Quick one this week, as I’ve sausages to get home to and Southampton are on the telly at 8…

Take That (pictured) knock Kaiser Chiefs off the top spot in the singles chart; I’d love to say it’s deserved, a la their excellent (oh come on, it is) ‘Patience’, but ‘Shine’ is, sadly, shite. Post-Brits profile-hiking clearly hasn’t done the reformed four any harm, as their Beautiful World album is also on the march (again): it rises from five to two in the appropriate chart.

Elsewhere in the singles chart, The Gossip score a hit with youknowwhat, which reaches seven on the back of a shit load of E4 ads for some show about naughty teenagers. It, the highest new entry, is followed by Cascada’s ‘Miracle’ at eight. I’ve no idea what that is. At all.

Scroll scroll scroll… ah, The Pigeon Detectives make 19 with their kinda okay-ish ‘Romantic Type’, and The Maccabees score at 33 with their also-decent-but-nothing-amazing ‘About Your Dress’ single. The Horrors are one place worse off with ‘Gloves’, which seems fair enough to me. Idlewild’s ‘No Emotion’ is at 36.

Albums! Kaiser Chiefs are at one with Yours Truly, Angry Mob. Predictable, the charts? Never. Last week’s number one, Amy Winehouse’s Back To Black, slips to three, with the top five filled by Mika at four and Snow Patrol at five. So far, so dull… but what’s this!? Electric Light Orchestra’s Out Of The Blue at 18 and Dr Hook’s Hits & History a place lower? Amazing!

Patrick Wolf’s The Magic Position just misses the top 40 at 46, and 30 Seconds To Mars are new at 51 with A Beautiful Lie. Here’s a beautiful lie for you: I care about what I’ve just written, just here, just now.

Ha! Do I fudge… I’m off to watch us spank Preston North End, fingers crossed. See ya, Championship!