DiS does like to play pop, from time to time, but for every ‘Back In Black’ there’s a ‘SexyBack’ just around the bend to trip you over with its initially impressive skitter and slide. To ensure you don’t suffer likewise, we’ll do our very utmost to provide you with a weekly guide to what’s what, chart-wise. So, here’s the runners and riders – and fallers and non-starters – for the week beginning July 17. THAT’S TODAY. Wow, the Romans were great…
Far from the ugliest face staring out from Tube posters the capital over, this Monday sees Lily Allen (pictured) cling on – like some spent Hubba Bubba stuck carelessly to the side of a bus seat, ready for the trailing skirt of some elderly lady to brush by and make one heck of a gooey mess – to top spot on the UK singles chart. Her ‘Smile’ continues to make the public at large, erm, smile, actually. Which is good for her, we suppose.
A little further down – beyond Shakira at two, whose hips are still shaking to the rhythm of truth – Neighbours star Natalie Bassingthwaighte successfully follows in the footsteps of Kylie and Jason with her band Rough Traders’ ‘Voodoo Child’. It’s quite the “banging”, so the local school kids told me outside the newsagents a little earlier. Razorlight’s ‘In The Morning’ settles at seven (review), while biting at their arses is Busta Rhymes, whose latest Mr And Mrs Smith-inspired video has propelled ‘I Love My Chick’ to unexpectedly lofty heights. Could its success have anything to do with him flirting outrageously with Popworld’s Alexa Chung t’other day? No, probably not.
Elsewhere, the teens are occupied by a handful of indie sorts: The Automatic’s ‘Monster’ sits pretty at 13 (unlucky for some? Have you read the review?); The Kooks’ ‘She Moves In Her Own Way’ rests but a couple of places higher; and The Zutons’ Flaming Lips-lite ‘Valerie’ hovers at 15, down three places from seven days earlier. New entries include James Dean Bradfield at 18 with ‘That’s No Way To Tell A Lie’ and Dirty Pretty Things at 20 with ‘Deadwood’. That’s the name of a telly show, too; they say “cunt” a lot, my mother tells me.
Disappointingly, Gnarls Barkley’s ‘Smiley Faces’ only enters at 23, but The Feeling tumble to 28, so it’s not all bad in the Top 40’s depths. Jamie T’s ‘Sheila’ hovers just above obliteration at 36 (review), and Rooster return with ‘Home’, in at 33. No doubt they’ll be flirting with Alexa next week.
Album-wise (and we’ll keep this brief, oh pickers of quick-fix pops), Muse reign like the modern-day kings of ridiculously OTT rock and roll that they are. If you’ve not got Black Holes And Revelations (review) on, loud, in your office right now, then blatantly you’re not us. ‘Cause we have. YEAH. Those pesky Kooks are at two with an album featuring their aforementioned single (review), and some other songs and stuff, and Thom Yorke’s debut solo effort, The Eraser, lands at three (review). A hearty “hurrah!” for bleeps ‘n’ pieces gatecrashing the charts like a rogue hurricane upping pedestrian precincts in Hull. Or. Something. Snow Patrol’s Eyes Open is at six (review), and Fatboy Slim’s Why Try Harder? compilation falls to nine (review). A glace downwards reveals Johnny Cash at 12 (review), Guillemots entering at an impressive 17 with their Through The Windowpane debut (review), and Kaiser Chiefs’ Employment STILL in the top 40 at 33 (review). Wow.
“So what’s out today?” I don’t hear you cry, ‘cause you’re not in the same room as me. Well, how’s a bit of McFly suit your tastes? The pop quartet’s ‘Please Please’/’Dont Stop Me Now’ double-a-sider is, like, totally Lindsey Lohan hot. Red Hot Chili Peppers’s ‘Tell Me Baby’, the second single to be ripped from their double-disc album Stadium Arcadium, is readily available at all good Virgin Megastores, as is Rhianna’s ‘Unfaithful’. Is it as good as ‘SOS’? Is it fuck…
So-hot-right-now singer-songwriter sort James Morrison is to begin his assault on Blunt-damaged hearts with ‘You Give Me Something’; let’s hope it’s nothing that itches. Franz Ferdinand get all boring with ‘Eleanor Put Your Boots On’ (review), Klaxons release their ‘Gravity’s Rainbow’ twelve-inch, and The Flaming Lips sorta-kinda re-release their excellent ‘The W.A.N.D.’ (review). We’d mind, but it’s fan-fucking-tastic, so let’s dance.
Albums, yeah we’ve seen some: Razorlight release Razorlight, Paolo Nutini transfers his face from a billion posters to an album cover, The Pipettes get all girly on their debut (review), and some girl called Lily’s Alright, Still. Apparently.
And that, is that. Sure, there are loadsa songs out today, but we’ve business to attend to, like finding something to get the thought of Mr JT getting sexy on our backs outta our heads...
Have a looksie here for DiS release listings.