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Normally, these columns are designed to raise debate, to analyse as well as polemicize situations within the music business but, for today, fuck that.
Simon Cowell’s attack on the Rage campaign has left me speechless. According to Kerrang, Cowell feels that the attack is against him personally, no suprise there given the monumental ego, and that the following is the sad truth
"Me having a Number One record at Christmas is not going to change my life particularly. It does however change these guys' lives and we put this opportunity there so that the winner of The X Factor gets the chance of having a big hit record.”
Quite aside from the ‘groovy uncle’ use of the word ‘guys’ which really grates lets actually work out the logic here. So, X Factor winners are due a hit record? It is an immutable law of the world that winning the competition or coming in the top three, five, ten gives you an inalienable right to have a hit?
Sorry but there’s no tears round here for the unfortunate if they don’t hit Number One. It’s a market and Cowell and countless no marks and talent in equal measure from his shows have had or not had hits according to market laws, they are not guaranteed nor due a hit in any way. The truth of the matter is that this isn’t about Cowell at all, it’s about a set of people sick to death of the way he has taken what used to be a really fun part of the pop music scene, the wait to see who would be Christmas Number One and covered it in grey. Another light going out in a world where Jona Lewie could surprise and it wasn’t always Cliff that got the stop spot. A bit of fun, a way to focus people on music and how much they enjoy it. So fuck him.
And while we’re at it can we get over the idea that Cowell is in any way a good thing for those of us who care about music? He doesn’t care about music at all. He cares about business and artist development and that’s fine but he’s not Berry Gordy and Syco isn’t Motown. Motown fond talent without advertising on tv and developed it with care and attention, not shit cover versions and tv voting. Motown had a political connotation whether they wanted it or not. They were a black label in the 60’s in the USA in the middle of the civil rights struggle. Whilst their great political records came in the late 60’s and into the 70’s every Motown record was political.
Nor is he Malcolm McLaren. Whatever my problems with punk (see my other pieces), The Sex Pistols genuinely over turned a culture and replaced it with something else. Jedward couldn’t turn over a slice of bread. And he isn’t Brian Epstein. If he is anything he is Pete Waterman, a grinning face celebrating all that is ephemeral and transitory in pop music. Now, that’s fine, pop music can be transitory and ephemeral but STOP TELLING ME THE GUY IS IMPORTANT. He’s only important because he makes a lot of money. How important is Pete Waterman now? How important was he in the 80’s? Thank you.
So, fuck Simon Cowell, good luck to the campaign, however stupid it may be as Sony end up winning either way (there is a third won't-someone-think-about-the-music way tho! - Ed) and I ain’t too keen on the track... a Merry Christmas to you all.
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ha
is their stuff even available digitally? Alternatively, rally together and 'Get Behind Me, Santa!' http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=196894760422&ref=mf - Sufjan FTW?
Finally...!
...someone who has written a piece on this rage-xfactor-crapmusic-realmusic debacle and actually made sense!
whatever your feelings on ratm or xfactor, the point is music has been hi-jacked, and tripe like xfactor is helping to produce a glut of meaningless music that doesn't have any impact beyond the rolling credits of the last installment of a glorified high school talent show.
and cowells an undoubtedly rich, and supposedly therefore talented, bastard.
Agreed!
But I think bringing up Motown muddies the issue - Syco records, or whatever umbrella organisation Cowell stands under doesn't give a hoot about music. It's a business - And yes, all labels have to be to a degree, but you telling me Earache would sign Ollie from The X Factor if they thought it would increase record sales? Of course fucking not. So it's not just about Cowell's big business verses another well known business, it's basic ethics and artistic integrity. Of which people like Cowell and Waterman have none. They've done more to ruin music than (and it hurts to say it) the shitehawks Scouting For Girls. At least their just shit, not greedy self serving twats.
Anyway, agree with all of this - All it makes me wanna do is by RATM more. Fuck you Cowell, you won't do what you tell me. SONY will tell me what to do instead.
...
Analogy Fail: Motown records and The Funk Brothers may have done it with an innovative style and super slick musicianship - but they were every bit a formula-driven hit factory as Syco is. They admit as much themselves.
If there's any difference at all its that collectively we're more aware of the techniques now than people were back then - some of us resent the cynical repackaging of the same musical motifs and styles being endlessly thrown back into the market day after day.
I'd like to see the likes Franz Frickin' Ferdinand or The XX as the house band for Cowell's company and see how good that sounds.
I disagree
Motown didn't time their releases to hit the Christmas market, they didn't utilise prime time tv to make hits, they didn't market test the public over months to release one single and, most importantly, THEY MADE GREAT RECORDS. Nothing that has come out of X Factor has any lasting relevance. His only genius is to come up with a way to monetise listening to demos / using other people's' songs.
Anyhow, that's in response to the kind of pieces seen (see Word this month) that suggest this very fact rather than some novel new idea of mine. Bottom line is his assertion that he owns the Number One slot whilst hiding behind what the competitors deserve was what really fucked me off. As though all other musicians and artists don't have any rights in the face of his end of the pier show.
...
Even the most cursory research on Motown would reveal that their artists went through an absolute shitload of market testing. The company utilised every possible asset and medium in order to make money. And while I have no idea whether they ever released a single at Christmas - exactly what relevance that has, is beyond me.
Furthermore, does Simon Cowell make more money if the X-Factor single is released at Christmas or September? I'm leaning towards "It doesn't make a lick of difference".
Motown are without a doubt the template for almost every cookie-cutter pop performer developer that has been in business over the last 40 years.
You could even say Cowell's X-Factor is a sight more 'indie' than they ever were since with this talent show, we get to see the performer raw, before they ever get anywhere. A Motown artist would have been locked away with image consultants and the like for months before they ever reached the public. And as with X-Factor, a lot of the time the songs existed independently of the artist - the multiple versions of Heard It Through The Grapevine to use just one example, bear that out.
well, when Cowell releases
What's Going On I'll agree with you but don't confuse indie with what Cowell does. Indie means independent, Syco is part of Sony, indie to my mind means independence of ideas and a belief in pushing the envelope of music, which, again, as you point out yourself, X Factor doesn't do with its endless round of cover versions.
Sure, Motown employed all of this but it created something far more worthwhile and long lasting. And, aside from all that, Gordy utlised his talents to create, however much market research was employed, Cowell throws everything at the wall, waits to see what the public want and then releases it. Not the same thing at all.
This is what really rankles me about the treatment of Cowell and his comments as quoted. This idea that he is somehow an outsider when he is the very heart of the mainstream and the idea that he is creative when he is essentially a strategic marketing man. I don't deny the right of X Factor to exist but i do deny his idea that he has a divine right to be top of the pile unchallenged and that, given his strong position we should somehow reinvent what he does to give it meaning. I repeat, he is Pete Waterman for this generation, that is all
...
- 99% of every act termed 'indie' I've heard in the last few years has been, in my opinion, lazy, pitiful, derivative bullshit, devoid of any original ideas; a direct result of the money-focussed industry that the bands themselves depend on. Indie as in "independent-sounding" is debased beyond meaning. It is now "White bands with scratchy guitars, etc".
- Syco is part of Sony. So what? Am I supposed to automatically dismiss something because Sony fund it?
- "Sure, Motown employed all of this but it created something far more worthwhile and long lasting [and Cowell doesn't]." - Well that's like, your opinion man. My opinion: What's Going On (and a lot of other Motown tuneage) is watery gash EXACTLY like most of the songs Cowell is responsible for. If a song is good, then it's good - whether it came from Sony Megacorp or my garage. And you may want to bear in mind that the exact accusations levelled at Simon Cowell were directed at Motown and other hit factories when they started. And we know how that turned out...
At the end of day, comparing Syco unfavourably to Motown is equal parts hypocrisy and ignorance. They're two peas in a pod.
I do
like to get the Sufjan out at Christmas I have to agree.
If our campaign does work (I think because it's a controversial choice that's why so many have joined) then having this strong song headed backlash will wipe the slate clean.
Perhaps we can look forward to a chart for all, not just for his machine's output.
Hey, wanna hear something that is, like, completely crazy?
Never actually watched this show. Is it any good?
I know I never want to hear "Killing in the Name" ever again though.
By the by: I knew Pete Waterman. Pete Waterman was my friend. Simon Cowell is no Pete Waterman. Though Cowell's haircut reminds me of the front cover of Public Image Ltd's "That What is Not" album for some reason.
I saw the devil...
And he had fake, white teeth. People worship him in Tesco, Asda and on telly.
i think you've been taken apart pretty well so far
but the idea that Simon Cowell doesn't like music is bullshit of the highest order. Of course he cares about money, but do you think he's spent his entire life doing something he doesn't care about? Anyone who's watched the programme knows he gets affected and is attached to music in the same way as anyone else. Except he's interested in pure pop, and the basest element of that - the vocalist. And he gets other people interested in it.. do you not think it's a good thing that the public at large is exposed to "the creative process"? And the creative process doesn't just mean writing shitty indie 4 chorders, but the actual process of performance. Getting inside a song, going through it as one single, uncut take. Is it not good that the public see a singer stripped bare of the production techniques used by *gasp* even credible artists? Is that not something worth taking into the wider world?
i don't really care either way about the x factor
but almost invariably, the end product is dire - in the case of the christmas single, an overwrought cover version with gospel choirs, key changes and kitchen sink thrown at it. if the winner was fixed up with a good songwriter and producer, and released something a bit more on the ball, i wouldn't mind, but you can sense the cheapness of it all from a mile away. that whole lack of innovation, with the reycling of songs and the tried-and-tested formula - which the article alluded to with the clumsy Motown analogy - is what drives me mad. still, what better way to fight that than with a rap-metal song from 1992, eh?
also, don't get too nostalgic about the christmas number one spot - it's been shit for years, as Mr Blobby, Bob The Builder, Westlife etc will testify. in what way did they make people focus on how much they love music?
to be honest....
...i feel sorry for the people who actually enjoy this show....they've been brainwashed....unfortunatly.
The whole campaign is built on nonsense anyway
Cowell's empire isn't going to crumble if the X Factor winner isn't number one, because a) he knows they'll more than likely shift units when the second single and album is out in October 2010 and b) the album chart Christmas number one will be between Susan Boyle, Westlife and JLS. Besides which, why pick RATM? They're no avatars of anti-commercialism, being on Sony and having had Killing In The Name on the Radio 1 playlist at the time - there seems to be this implicit belief that Reggie Yates, exactly the kind of person you'd imagine would go along with such a campaign for the post-ironic lols (Cotton definitely would and is probably going to support it as if it were her own next week), will play the unedited version on the Christmas chart show, even though even the organisers are suggesting 'we' buy the radio edit. It doesn't make any difference at the end of the day. Nobody is suddenly going to buy RATM over the winner because they're aimed at completely different audiences, one much larger and far more commercially/publicity viable than the other. The citadels of all we hold dear in independently minded music didn't collapse because Alexandra Burke's Hallelujah outsold Jeff Buckley's.
''Cowell finds talent people like, records stuff people want to buy, they buy it, people get angry at Cowell?''
i think you can discard the points about..'people like the x factor songs so they buy it. simple as'.
the question is, why do they like it in the first place. La roux going huge is because people liked the song. given, she was in the right place at the right time, as she has said herself, but the x factor, inevitably, going huge, is because it's rammed down peoples gullets until they feel so caught up in it all, buying the record is an extension of watching the programme itself. it's inevitable, enjoyment of music doesn't really come in to it, it's enjoyment of the whole brand. tell me, can you imagine this sentence being uttered..
(imagine a 14 year old girl or whoever buys)
''well....i really like olly, yeah. loved him all the way through...really thought he had a good voice...but i didn't really like the song he chose to release at xmas so i didn't buy it''
no chance. more discerning music fans might choose not purchase a record by someone they like based on...y'know...the actual quality of the music (similarly, why would you buy RATM if you didn't actually like the song and were just making a stand. bizzare). x-factor fans will buy whatever because it's just become an extension of watching.
that said, i actually think it would be impossible to come up with a cover version by the winner that wouldn't sell. metal machine music as done by olly would still rock the top. you could argue that people like steve and andy, who slipped into obscurity after the initial wave of success, is an example of x factor buyers being discerning and voting with their wonga. or were they just failed by the marketing juggernauts. did viewers really go from fervant appreciating to not caring because the quality of music changed from the performers? doubt it.
so no. they don't just buy because they like the tunes.
i think people might be angry at cowell because he's created a culture in which you don't have to listen anymore, just watch. and that aint music yo. that said, stacey seems perfectly charming and can sing a tune so whatever. again, not sure how she would be marketed though....can't see her busting grooves ala burke and lewis and girls aloud and jls...and it seems like ballads will only get you so far after winning one of these competitions.
i dunno...who the fuck knows or cares. not me. i'm glad i wrote all this to show how little i care.
Fuck yeah.
You all seem to be missing the woods for the trees, and the trees are large pines dusted with snow and the tears of small children. Following this to it's logical conclusion, we can conclude that Cowell is the antichrist, and he sends his many floppy fringed minions to establish a OWG over the Earth. It is, I believe, in Revelations.
Contrarily, the Jews do not believe in the antichrist, and I know of no Jew who watches X Factor. It follows that only the Jewish can save us, and so I wish them a Happy Hannukah and pray they loosen the nefarious grip Leona Lewis has on the minds of the young. Also, a two state solution is a real, viable alternative to the current bloodshed in the Middle East, and so I ask you to pray with me for this social utopia to be established.
FYI, Leona Lewis may be a technically proficient singer, but she can't carry a tune. This means that she is carrying something else - possibly the antichrist's child? If she is with the child of the hoof footed one, this explains the rather disgusting title of her song "Bleeding Love." Far from it being a piercing social analysis of the effect a broken hymen and/or late period may have on a young girl, it is in fact nothing less than a subliminal cry for help. We must liberate Leona Lewis, friends.
Susan Boyle is an average singer who looks like a bag of slapped bastards and therefore is considered more talented than she actually is. We must help her find work in her local Debenham's when the inevitable backlash begins.
Apart from that, I agree with everything the author of the article says.
My problem, if you read the piece
is his insistence that somehow anyone challenging the X Factor winner's right to have a Number One is unnaceptable. Just read the quote again, he is pretty much saying that he now has the RIGHT to expect the Number One slot for Christmas, not for him or Syco you understand but for 'the guys', his artists. The rest of it is me ranting (and I admit that at the start) but ranting on what I feel is a bloody good basis.
As for him liking music, I disagree. If he liked music he'd not be churning out cover versions weeek on week but finding writing talent to link to his competitors. He likes entertainment. That's fine but it's a different thing. X Factor is a talent contest, that's entertainment, not A & R. And, again, I don't have a problem with this. The only thing I have a problem with is him throwing his toys out of the pram because someone has dared to disrupt his cosy closed shop.
I made the Motown / McLaren comparisons because I am piss bored with critics falling over themselves to retrospectivly give him some kind of artificial artistic position. He is on Newsnight tonight and expect to see his face grinning at you from a cover come Tuesday evening / Wednesday morning so he's got plenty of ammunition to fairly get the Number One for those poor X Factor 'guys' without behaving like a spoilt kid.
As for all this about Motown being similar is arse, Motown had Holland-Dozier-Holland (amongst others) writing for their artists and brought through the Supremes / Jacksons / Marvin Gaye etc etc. Sorry but don't tell me that Alexandra Burke or Jedward or Susan Boyle are even in the same game, never mind the same league.
Brine Haw 4 Mare
X factr is killing the indy lke McDonlads. I'm HATNG It!blink4lyf
Waterman wrote.
He wrote many hit songs. Cowell doesn't. Also Waterman's contribution to musicians (particularly his Transfermation studio) is devalued by such pieces. I can understand your anger, but it's pretty fucking childish. Get a grip.
did you
really huddle round the radio, heart beating in anticipation, to see whether mr blobby or bob the builder or sclub 7 or crazy frog had got to christmas one?
have you suffered the torture of working in a mainstream record shop at christmas? (two words: il divo).
the christmas number one is just another commercial opportunity for record companies to grab some of the public's fickle festive interest, and cash, and sell more records. yawn yawn....get over it.
i think the xfactor show is getting moronic but it's saturday night karaoke entertainment....it's only pop music. chill out!
Simon Cowell's not killing anything. He does what he says he does, cares about it, doesn't moan, rewards people who have ability, and is to honest with those who don't.... and, most, of all, does it all successfully - I love the fact some receptionist like Leona can suddenly be on Oprah and sell 5billion records if they have the ability to gain the public's imagination....whilst these acts are quite stage managed, the ones who've done well are good at what they do....i mean, look at Michelle McManus.

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