Festival Food on a Budget!
Go To Tesco
Tesco is best for three reasons:
1. It isn’t a horrible brown colour like Sainsbury.
2. It isn’t owned by “would you like a hand gun with your sprouts” US giant Wallmart (see: Asda).
3. Tesco Value
Buy The Following
1 carton of 4 Tesco Value packet soups (minnestroni) £0.28
1 carton of Tesco Value instant mash potatoe £0.56
3 packets of Hao Hao flavoured noodles £0.33
1 pot of beef&tomatoe flavour Tesco Value pot noodle £0.39
6 pack of Tesco crisps (various flavours) £0.74
12 Wagon Wheels (packs of 6, buy 1 get 1 free) £0.68
Total Cost = £2.98
oh, borrow a camping stove or hexi burner, it’s important.
Menu
Thursday
You’ll want to eat something before drinking copious amounts of alcohol (it’s traditional) so make your Tesco Value pot noodle and eat it with a couple of Wagon Wheels. Wash out the pot and keep it.
Friday
The morning is a bad time to play with camp stoves and fire in general so it’s a packet of crisps (avoid cheese and onion before midday) and a Wagon Wheel for your breakfast. Lunch is a wonderful packet of Hao Hao noodles (beef or chicken, avoid prawn) complemented by a Wagon Wheel. Eat noodles from Tesco Value pot noodle pot from last night for proper festival effect. Otherwise eat from pan. Dinner is where it gets really exciting, make up one of your instant soups in your value pot noodle pot but don’t fill to the brim. Now add spoons of instant mash to the soup until you get the desired mash consistency. Hurrah, minnestoni mash potatoe! Eat with packet of crisps and guess what...a Wagon Wheel!
Saturday & Sunday
As Friday, although if you feel daring try swapping the lunch and dinner around.
Monday
Before you leave you’ve just got time to munch up the last packet of soup (potatoe optional) and 2 Wagon Wheels. You will officially be fed up of all the products mentioned by now but on the plus side you should be relatively healthy and have spent approximately 1/20th of what you would have getting diorrhea from the festival food vendors!
Drinks
I would suggest Tesco lager (not Tesco Value lager you understand!), with 3% cans coming in at £1.75 for 4 and 5%ers for £2.99 it’s hard to beat and tastes pretty good. But alas Reading has no Tesco so it is to brown coloured Sainsbury you must go, or to the trucks selling crates of 24 for ridiculous sums of money. Just try to avoid cider, this isn’t Glastonbury you know...
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I bought a bottle of cider there and it leaked in the car all over my 'value' digestive biscuits.
Fuck.
Festival Food on a Budget!
That's my plan. My plans usually end up going one of two ways, either incredibly well (look around dis for a second..) or are a bit hit'n'miss (see my attempt at relying on pr people for a reading ticket).
I'll get back to proof reading probe so that all 20,000 issues can goto print for reading.... if you see one, grab one for free off us (cus it is FREE!!) and say hello! :o)
byeeeeeee
Sean
Festival Food on a Budget!
Festival Food on a Budget!
do not, i repeat, not, buy Martini, it might look cheap for the alcohol content, oh, and James Bond drinks it, but it's *FOUL*
basicly
and needing teh toilet is all in teh mind, it can be overcame with hardcore training
rah.
Festival Food on a Budget!
i.e:
go to the nearest tesco/safeway/kwiksave [if it's a basic supermarket it'll do.]
purchase two large multipacks of crisps and a pack of jammy dodgers.
live off crisps all weekend.
steal all other essentials [i.e. vodka] from surrounding tents, in exchange for jammy dodgers. surrounding campers will be so enchanted by your privileged possession of such wonderful and covetable munchables that they will offer vodka, jaffacakes and indeed sexual favours in return for your jammy dodgers.
one idea might be to put up a sign, advertising your jammy dodger trade. you'll get lots of vodka then. :)
o
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Gen
[nb: it does help if they're gomez fans.]
Jaffa Cakes, yum!
pah! who would trade jaffa cakes for jammy dodgers...obvious drug fuelled madness and bound to lead to more regrets in the morning than any alcohol induced vomiting incidents!
Festival foood budget style...for my first one I took alot of tesco value tinned fruit salad, meatballs,crisps and about 50 breakfast bars in my attempts to inject my festival diet with some vitamins....I spent about £6 on food for 2 of us, and about £50 on beer :S
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