My cell phone died. Bought a new one. Threw old one away. Later realized I had thrown the new one away instead! Great way to start the day!
My 15-year old car now has 50,000 miles on it. That averages less than 4 miles of driving a year. Calling the Guiness Book of Records!
My office at POW! has a life-size figure of Spidey. I should get rid of it. More people wanna be photographed with that figure than with me!
"Wow, Stan Lee came back to your shop?"
"Stan Lee never left my shop. I am starting to think his mind may no longer be in mint condition."
(i actually don't know if it's actually real, but STILL)