DiS watches the Brit Awards: our wine was nice and we drank the whole bottle
- Artists:
- Muse »
- Lily Allen »
- The Fratellis »
- Arctic Monkeys »
- The Killers »
- Amy Winehouse »
- Justin Timberlake »
- Take That »
- Nelly Furtado »
- Oasis »
- James Morrison »
Last night DiS sat down at home, a bottle of M&S red and some spaghetti before us, and flicked our telly over to channel three. Russell Brand! Not talking about his ball bags! It could only mean one thing: we’d tuned into the first live Brit Awards since that whole Sam and Mick fiasco.
Before we get into the whole Who Won What list thing, in an echo of this article, these are the things we learned from watching last night’s love-and-hate-themed awards ceremony on our boxes.
- Russell Brand’s hair really is that big.
- ‘Chelsea Dagger’ truly is a bag of shit.
- James Morrison, right, he’s really bad.
- Slutting yourself up, lyrically, in your latest songs and wearing a dress that barely conceals your jumper bunnies works wonders at awards ceremonies: see Nelly Furtado.
- Wearing a nice dress, smiling politely at photographers and doing a twirl on the red carpet doesn’t get you owt: see triple-nominated Lily Allen
- Hitting duff notes on the telly doesn’t matter when the viewers have already voted your single their favourite of the last year: see Take That.
- James Morrison, right, he’s really bad.
- Fearne Cotton’s accent is well weird sometimes. Is she from London or Lancashire? Or, like, Greenland. What?
- Cat Power’s so much hotter than Beyoncé.
- Dressing up in silly clothes is amusing: see Arctic Monkeys’ acceptance videos.
- Orson? Really?
- Seriously, Britain: James Morrison is crap. Just stop it already.
And here are those winners in full:
British Male Solo Artist: James Morrison
British Female Solo Artist: Amy Winehouse
British Group: Arctic Monkeys
Mastercard British Album: Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I Am Not
British Single: Take That – ‘Patience’
British Breakthrough Act: The Fratellis
British Live Act: Muse
International Male Solo Artist: Justin Timberlake
International Female Artist: Nelly Furtado
International Group: The Killers
International Album: The Killers - Sam's Town
International Breakthrough: Orson
Outstanding Contribution To Music: Oasis
DiScuss: Good? Bad? Ugly? Liam!?
- In Photos: Muse @ O2 Arena, London
- The Insider: Doing it for the kids? How Radio One needs to get over its obsession with youth
- Muse - The 2nd Law
- Weekend Listening: Gwilym Gold, Jens Lekman, Erol Alkan, Patrick Wolf + lots more
- News Mixtape: August 2012 ft. Kate Bush, Pussy Riot, Tom Waits, Flying Lotus, Talk Talk, Kanye West
- This Week's (Olympic!) Singles! 23.07.12: Muse, Delphic & Keane
- Leeds Festival - A DiS Summary
- Leeds 2011: A Festival Diary
joss stone
was like the female chris_is_cool
you mean DiS didn't get invited to the show proper?
and i thought you'd made it...
Three in the last five
'Smile' was also in the running for single, but didn't make the final five.
Ah I see..
All I have to do to win an outstanding contribution to music award in Britain is hang onto 6 shamefully poor album releases and call everyone else shit whilst still claiming they copied you.
I actually laughed so hard at reading Orson winning "best international breakthrough act" a little bit of wee came out. I hate these award things, but the thing that depresses me most is, in 20 years time the future will look back at us and say... "JAMES MORRISON??! Wow 2006 was a really shit year for music! oh well, back to my flying car :)"
Orson...
yeah they suck arse!
and..
Liam Gallagher really can't sing after all these years, u would think he'd be better by now!
its not an invite.
you pay thousands of pounds in bpi membership to go. that gives you your tickets.
British Live Act: Muse
The only one I agree with.
Which is one more than usual.
Jesus christ
Were Oasis always that bad? Did Liam always go out of breath after singing two words, and did Noel always play "solos" with the sort of rigidity that suggests the horribly clichéd Fisher Price ROCK AND/OR ROLL licks he's churning out are really pushing his ability as a guitar player, therefore needs to concentrate on them REALLY HARD? That live outro performance was EMBARASSING. Being wasted is no excuse either, because you should be a lot more animated and entertaining than that if you're off your trolley. They just looked so very old...
Ha ha
"Jumper bunnies"
OASIS
Were embarrasing to watch, as was Joss stone, failed second album love??? reinvent ya self as a sassy american sex kitten or something like that
The reason why the Monkeys didn't attend is...
..Because they are too busy getting fucked by their masters NME.
Their acceptance videos were the most unfunny shit I have ever seen.
james morrison
is unbelievably bland, limpdicked schlock. has he been on parkinson yet? seems right up his alley
nutini does actually seem to have potential though. unlike james morrison, he seems like he's got a brain, balls and a personality, and his voice is distinctive, natural and unaffected. they just need to give him better songs; his ballad singles are godawful; that jenny don't be hasty song is great though
the reason why the monkeys didn't attend
is because they think award shows are horrible events full of horrible people who are completely out of touch with reality, which they are (and the brits are the worst). they said as much in their interview with q after they won a q award for something or other. its nothing to do with not being able to get there due to rehearsals or video shoots...bands and singers routinely take intercontinental flights to get to these award shows (muse flew from the us to get to the mercury prize last year on the same day as the ceremony, the rhcp were at the grammies only a couple of days ago). and they knew the date of these awards, and knew they were obviously going to get nominated for something, a long long time ago, and could have worked their schedule around that. the reason they're not there is because they don't want to be there
its pretty pathetic really...if they had bothered to attend no doubt someone on here would have taken a shot at them for being industry whores only concerned with promotion. i dont particularly like them but they're a band who are clearly very down-to-earth people who have little tolerance of industry bullshit and who aren't willing to conform to the tedious routine of the modern mainstream music industry. really dont see how anyone here could object to that. the brits are shit, as everyone here agrees. so why go to them then?
I largely agree
I'm pretty indifferent to their music but at least they have a far better attitude seemingly than the horrible Gallaghers and all the Kasabians, Razorlight singers/band members etc
I think
they've learned from Oasis' mistakes and they're purposely keeping a distance from the showbiz side of things which we all know has nothing to do with the music.
They're trying to give themselves a chance of being in it for the long-term, good luck to em.
oi!
noel is brilliant. hes a nice man
As much as a lot of people
despise The Kooks, how could they not have won best breakthrough act? They fit all the criteria - coming from nowhere to sell an acclaimed multi-platinum album and they're really young. The Fratellis = a mindless, dense soundtrack for getting smashed.


Muse
Lily Allen
The Fratellis
Arctic Monkeys
The Killers
Champion Sound #13: Part 1 – Ten Yeezus Pieces
Parklife Weekender 2013 – The Drowned in Sound Review
Drowned In Sheffield #14
DiS Does Singles 17.06.13: Dornik, Washed Out, AlunaGeorge
All Hail the Culturati... Fighting Over Radiohead's Hail to the Thief
Cutting Through the Noise: What it's really like representing new artists at events like The Great Escape
Comments
- Post a new comment on this article