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ive never heard of these before. has anyone else (i wont say what i think they are yet, so as not to bias people...)
Less messy, granted.
I try and have a wank with a girl on.
I don't know what I was thinking. It's Friday afternoon, that's my excuse.
have I let you down?
when intending to reply. I think it was Jasmine, sorry.
I am naive... I had no idea that such notions existed.. like, what's the point?
* abandon reply
always thwarting myself.
anyway it wouldn't have been. Some of this had me weeping with joy:
A big long pause.
you can pay someone to do it for you?
that depends on the type of prossie you want. And if you want him/her to use lotion.
from personnal experience ?
he kept them in a draw by his bed and would show them to people when they came over his house.
He was from Portland.
but this guy had a collection :-/
didnt enjoy it, didnt really work. cried for a bit. had a proper one. then realised i had a gf, and cried some more.
not the best morning
but if yr really posh, you have your butler do it
he just gets the termites from dianas coffin to wriggle round until he shoots his load.
it was a reference to that privelege ad.
what should I do?
And take a course in self-flagellation.*
*no, I don't mean have a "posh wank".
people like Kirstie Allsopp.
according to my sources it is wanking with a condom on. maybe its just to stop you having babies with your hand?
The amount I do it I could have had my own private army of them by now
off urban dictionary. I think i like the small army of hand babies better. Though if it was winter, how many gloves would you need? And if you had twins, would they both be, say, right handed? And would that mean they could only march in circles? And how would they have babies? WTF?
To masturbate having first gone to the trouble of donning a condom.
The idea being that the extra time, effort, financial investment and ceremony involved separate this from a base, brutal or "lower" wank - the ocassion suggested by wearing a condom would usually only arise in company, and more specifically for pentrative sex with a special other.
i wasn't going to see lisa for 4 days, and i had the time and felt like spoiling myself, so i dressed the old chap up and had a posh wank.
I thought I'd tailed this thread off with my talk of excessive masturbation
cant really read what youve written there very well...
You can't masturbate in excess !
*wipes blood off hand with kleenex*
what are you going to go and do?