Some of you may know I've recently returned from a lengthy sabbatical. I can now reveal that during this period of absence, I was conducting an (er...semi-)xindependent enquiryx into the attitudes of DiS forum users.
To cut a long story short, I have come to the conclusion that DiS is Institutionally Emoist (those who would like to read my full report can't visit www.xemoofficex.gov.uk/report.pdf, cos you're not xscenex enough)
Emoism is cunning and appears in many guises. I am daily stung by the repeated flippant and pejorative use of the term 'emo', a practice which is just the tip of an iceberg of misunderstanding that remains both gratuitously, and fucking, large. I may have floppy hair of an unnaturally dark shade, and a proliferation of undersized black clothes, some of which I have been known to share with my xgirlfriendx, but I am a person too.
The extra-whiny version of pop-punk we all love to hate is a cruel distortion and misappropriation of a variety of hardcore punk with a noble past and a vibrant and innovative future.
So please, have a heart. Think of me, every night, weeping into my xjournalx as my heart beats through the wall of my chest like a bullet through the stained-glass wings of a fallen angel. Wearing xeyelinerx.
We at the xEmo Officex will shortly be rolling out an emo awareness xadvertising campaignx, including shocking looped footage of puppies being kicked to death by emo-hating indie kids, and like leaflets and xshitx. And a screaming man parading around school playgrounds dressed as a Myspace.
So stop being mean or the xemo-policex will take you to xHMP WitheredAutumnFlowersx and tie you up with spiky belts and smack your face off with a fire hose.
With xlovex from your resident self-confessed emo,
p.s. Otherwise, please feel free to post your abuse in xthex space provided below.