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Ronseal. Done before but always enjoyable.
What will you do with it all?
"Exactly what it says on the tin". Unlucky!
Making all "What would you do if you won the lottery?" conversations, in any format, illegal for perpetuity.
fine, i won't buy you a car with my imaginary winnings
That's Dr Grumpy to you, pal.
Go to the pub
whilst working out my notice put 5 or 6 million into investments
then have a round the world trip for about 3 or 4 months, having fun and scouting out places i might want to buy a house
buy a flat in london and a big pad with swimming pool, studio space etc in the country, and a nice holiday home somewhere hot
get a personal trainer
get loads of music and art equipment
have a big party
get a chef to teach m how to be an amazing cook
stuff liek that
• Go on holiday immediately tonight (probably SE Asia somewhere, first class obvs)
• Upon return, buy house in London (Crystal Palace), buy one for my sis wherever she wants, buy my parents a flat in London and pay off their mortgage
• Get someone to invest my money wisely in something so the rest of the cash lasts forever
• Start volunteering / training to be a bike mechanic instead of working for money, might even start a business
• Give ESA some money to fix the site
I don't think I'd ever approach the world of work ever again if at all possible.
the bike mechanic thing with a view to opening a bike shop one day / to give me some skillz in the event it all goes tits up, cos fuck going back to a desk job
They probably wouldn't mind. They do ski stuff too, so that would be handy if you were also interested in skiing.
Great shop. I live... along that road.
call my missus and tell her to do the same, break the news and go get lashed somewhere, call my parents and ask them what I could buy them as a gift, then make some appointment with an accountant or something to work out how I can milk this so I can be a man of leisure for the forseeable future (is £15m enough to never work again?)
So 75k a year if you invested all of it. That would probably do me fine tbf. Could spend a few mill on property up front, and get down to 10m and still bring in 50k without any mortgage or crap to pay.
put 6 mil in the bank and you get about £180,000 a year off the interest!
And not get a pang of spending guild at adding guacamole.
It's like having an ex that you know would ruin your life, but you never stop thinking about getting back together.
But, with internet dragons.
Go to the National Lottery building.
Present my ticket, sort out the admin and get a heap of bunse off them.
Go straight to Musicmaker and buy them out of all their best guitars and basses.
Rent a bus back to Cork to bring all the instruments home.
Meet my landlord, buy the house I currently rent.
Go to my local record shop and buy the whole place up.
Buy a few pairs of Technics 1200s.
Get my house renovated over the next few months.
Listen to and play music all the time.
Give out my collection of instruments to my friends and buy more.
Go to Nandos to celebrate.
pay off my uni debts
pay off friends' uni debts, give good friends 50k each and best friend 1mil so he and his family can live comfortably/he can move out again and into a nice accessible flat with a massive kitchen
give brother and parents some money but not too much because their response to the lottery question is "Why would you give money to your friends?" which is unbelievably selfish so fuck them
go on endless holidays with friends until I've gone everywhere I want to go to (may take several years)
buy huge, amazing bachelorette pad in London or Manchester, get it fitted with a bar, pool table and swimming pool. maybe a hot tub too
donate to land mine removal charities
invest the rest
which is frightening
That's not even enough to get the blue dots back.
and recording a dubstep album?
To, idk, do the dishes or something.
AND SMEE DANCES ON THE SAND
JUST LIKE THAT RIVER TWISTING THROUGH A DUSTY LAND
Buy a new car, look at houses, buy/plan to build a studio for Brooke.
invest some, sort out friends and family with debts, and things they need.
or buy some land and build my own
sort out my parents & gf's parents mortgages
buy a flat down in london + a decent whack towards one for my brother.
get a couple of proper, tailored suits.
go on a long, big holiday with my GF, flying different people out to join us for a bit at various points
get a house somewhere sunny.
that'd probably take me down to about £10m, which I'd invest and live off the interest. maybe buy a pub/cafe or something too
which should be enough to cover all combinations of numbers, then win the lottery again.
I would so nothing differently, at least not for a number of months.
And whenever I complain about my life, I remember this fact and STFU.
Obviously, come month 8, I go total Tonto and die 3 weeks later from collapsed septum and general Fun OD.
(have you seen the tweets my bf has been sending to ISIS today *changes identity (again) and moves country (again)*)
I'd totally forgotten about till it popped into my head for no apprentice reason a couple of hours ago :)
don't trust one charity enough or care about one particular cause enough other all others do give millions to one charity, so probably spread £5m around food banks, charities, just giving people money or whatever.
give me and me dad and me sister a million each. give me nan some presents or summat and my auntie who looks after her too.
then just go to japan and eat loads of sushi.
pay off all debts
buy a super sweet campervan
fuck off in said van living like a king (a king in a van) for a few months and plan the rest of my doshed-up life
Buy a big house in Melbourne. Get MCG and Etihad stadium memberships.
administration costs would probably eat up the remainder
stop reminding me i haven't won the lottery.
Which I will leave empty (sorry) because renters destroy the place. That's the money safe, then I will continue living life identically to how I do now. And not tell a soul I've won, of course.
Fools tax and all that. There's a much higher chance, statistically on winning with certain scratchcards so that's a better way (to get £20)
sit in it for a few years not leaving the country in fear of dying in a plane crash or something before I could enjoy my winnings
1. pay off everyone in my extended family's mortgages/buy their houses for them. the ones who don't want to own the places they're renting/council houses can pick somewhere else, because i'm that kind. also cars for anyone who wants a new car.
2. buy myself somewhere i can live with my dog.
3. invest in actual property.
4. buy myself some proper shoes and an actual sturdy bag made of actual material not canvas.
5. go everywhere i want to go to within this country (mainly fishing villages on the east yorkshire coast, the highlands and the cities i haven't been to)
6. get round to renewing my passport and book to go to america.
7. maybe book up for driving lessons.
obviously whilst i was away i'd make plans to start a non-profit organisation as soon as i got back
then give my sister about £10,000 so she can buy a new house. but she'll have to work all her life i'm afraid because she does a useful job.
i would buy 3 houses
i would go to america and then go to an 18-30 holiday resort in europe
i would buy whatever job i feel i would like to have
i would buy something in my hometown like the public rooms or something that they want saving instead of having to sell off.
i would probably do a rich get richer sort of thing and have a billion in a few years and then freeze my head and buy an electric bike. then maybe play sim city in real life
Call my former friends and tell them I won the lottery. Then I hang up and block them so they know they lost out on my generosity because of them being such massive cunts
that more people on here haven't said that they'd give most of it away to good causes.
If only they had the money to do so.
large amounts of unearned, untaxed wealth distasteful if it's they and their family who have it.
Yer maw obviously
Then for buying a cool flat when I finish uni
I reckon that's a bad idea, even if you don't like your job. Keep things "normal" while you work out what you want to do. If you just go home and sit there you won't know what to do with yourself. Your mates aren't all going to be able to join you. In the meantime, your job will be a lot more fun knowing that you're free of the constraints of goals and targets mattering to your future welfare...
I know I've just won the prize for "most boring answer ever".
including you lot.
And reply to every post with a jpeg of your bank balance
Wouldn't walk straight out on work, as they're good folk, generally. Agree with wotsit above who says it'd be all the sweeter anyway knowing you could take or leave it.
That night: call everyone I love and tell them the news. Probably start working out the best thing to do for them all (pay off mortgages, loans, help buy flats etc). Maybe do a one-time debauched holiday for friends/family.
GF could quit job. Probably enrol in some kind of masters thing in London, which'll keep her quiet in six months when I'm on the randan with all my winnings.
Buy us a nice, not ridiculous flat in London. Kit it out. Probably think about quitting work and travelling the world. Come back and start a family. Having been jobless before I know I'd start to go insane so would at least have some projects on the go.
Oh: See loads of cool plays, bands, shows, films, etc.
cause I like my job and my organisation does good things and I wouldn't want to leave them in the lurch.
I'd definitely buy a nice property in London, but nothing majorly expensive. I'd also pay my parent's mortgage off and give my two bro's a big chunk of money.
After that not sure? Would like to set myself up for life financially, with a view that I could make a bit of a job from deciding where best to donate the proceeds to charity. I think that would be nice.
I'd probably eventually go back to do uni and study something for a while. Would be nice to fund a post-grad bursary at my old uni too.
like waiting for the money to come in and clear, and paperwork and legal shite. So right now - nothing probably. It would be tempting to tell work to fuck off, but there could be some nice satisfaction keeping things normal knowing you have a fuckload of money in the bank.
But yeah, once sorted - actually leave work. I wouldn't want to tell them I am leaving because I have 15 mil though. Claim personal or family reasons, maybe even wangle it so they can potentially keep my position open.
Basic stuff to get sorted is clear any debts, including boring stuff like student loans and my current mortgage. Then get cracking and buy a nice big house to live in. Nothing mental, no country mansions. Could even have some fun and oversee somewhere being completely renovated. Could then do the same with the old place and sell it on. I'd get a couple of decent cars - again, solid, no Ferraris. Not even BMW territory. A nice Fiat 500 for the city and something else for long journeys.
Then when settled work out a long term plan, investments and all that to have an income forever.