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First time I've had one in god knows how many years. It's massive! Must be about 3 whole chickens in here.
So whenever I do, it's fucking brilliant! :D
Never sober, always on a drunken walk home.
as waking up with one of those foam beige boxes still in your hand.
I have been there and it genuinely made me consider stopping drinking for 45/50 minutes
continue eating a kebab out of one in her sleep after passing out. It was a disturbing sight.
Why wait? It makes the walk home/wait for a bus so much better.
Although I once had to chuck a pair of Converse away because the chilli/garlic sauce I had on my kebab had gone all over them on the walk home and had caused irreparable staining/damage.
and how likely it is that the person you walked home with and who could not be bothered to wait in the drunken takeaway has arrived home, left the door wide open and passed out as she fell on to the sofa...
Something grotesquely utilitarian about sitting in a harshly lit takeaway joint drunkenly shovelling in meat while trying to avoid eye contact with the man who's come in and is mumbling threats to himself under his breath. Whereas I can get it home, stick on something trashy to watch, indulge myself (plus extra sauces / cutlery / napkins if needed) and pass out without worrying about the consequences.
Eating takeaway pissed up stumbling around is pretty much as low as humankind can stoop
Have a word with yourself, ffs.
a small "chicken" donner to be honest
you need to upgrade your order.
I love a chips and donner 'meat' with garlic mayo all over it. It's horsemeat for courses innit.
I feel oddly sad about this.
like having an ice cream that's just the stick and the wrapper.
and think "ah come on, that is fuck all meat, I wish I had a large!". Then I try and eat it and realise there can be a ridiculous amount of meat in there.
I have started eating kebab wraps recently, instead of forking up all the salad and trying to wrap up a poorly opened pitta, it is all in there ready to tuck in. Often cheaper too, but less visually impressive.
Maybe back when the A-Z nights were still going.
Live off Green Lanes these days, the only kebabs I get are properly cooked, charcoal grill shenanigans :(
which is amazing, considering they are sticks of meat left in the open for long periods of time. I have had dodgy canapees at least twice, and a dodgy chicken sandwich from a Spar, but never a doner.
tbf I think I've done the most damage with excess chilli sauce rather than the dry horsemeat shavings
Comfort, condiments, cutlery, nice read/watch of the news ...
Fuck eating in a kebab shop and then having to get home full of food and feeling sleepy.