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had him in October '96
it was the winter of 2006 and I'd just got off the phone with a farmer form East Sussex. pleased with my telephonic performance, an in procession of my favourite and only sharpish knife from the office kitchen i proceeded to slice into my orange. slicing into sixths in a wholly appropriate way, i did what anyone in my position that wanted to eat an orange they had recently sliced into sixths would have done. I ate it.
One particular game against ayr ladies (and believe me, you don't get many 'ladies' in Ayr) had been particularly vicious and I was playing on the wing against a big lump of a lassie who was remarkably fast and I flet like I'd covered about 10k in the first half alone. it was also a scorching hot day and I had my period, so was really not feeling tiptop. I recall quite clearly how that orange at halftime was like manna. i'd like an orange now.
Ridiculously consistent, orange-wise. Perfection every time. No fucking pips either. Fuck a pip.
So delicious and juicy.
I once nicked one from a garden I was walking past.
Lucky I didn't get caught, heard the punishment is pretty Sevilla.
are you taking the pith?
I know this is probably from some weak observational comedian, but oranges are kind to pointless, other fruits have all their advantages with none of the disadvantages
i saw a child playing with a tangerine the size of a tangerine.