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for me it's a 4 way tie between Luton, Milton Keynes, Scarborough and everywhere in Scotland
Seems like the perfect place to go slowly fucking demented
One of those decimated seaside towns.
i love it!
(I know this was probably baiting)
Gainsborough, Louth, Goole, somewhere like that. crap transport, no jobs, no good places to visit, no hope.
one of the knackered ex-mining towns in South Wales, like Ebbw Vale. also lose points for being in Wales.
Northern Island's a bit far from everyone/thing i know too, and hardly seems like Avalon
Stoke is just ring roads and industrial estates and sadness.
And Goole swimming pool has a great slide, so I'd go back there.
actually i want to know a couple who live in Goole so i can call them a Pair of Goolies
i used to have recurring anxiety fantasies about having to go and take a job in Shrewsbury. never sure why the prospect upset me so much, can't imagine Shrewsbury's that not nice a place
But of the places I've actually visited, I'd say Great Yarmouth.
to a move to Aberdeen. it would have been absolutely silly money, but it's so far from home, and even though I quite like curry and strip clubs, it's all that aberdeen seems to have for nightlife (from my own experiences of going there- I'm sure it has a lot more that I've not seen).
I applied for Uni at Aberdeen purely on the basis that it was as far from home as I could get. Had no idea what sort of place it was. Didn't get offered a place so was saved from that.
so now you know
is massive vulture-sized seagulls carpet bombing the place with shit.
Two old ladies walking down the street got hit right in front of me. It looked like they'd had white paint thrown all over them.
because I can't be arsed to think about it
Actually Luton wins hands down. Most depressed old mining towns have a chummy "shit and we know it" communal vibe to them, and are often near outstanding pieces of natural beauty. Those southern commuter dormitory towns have nothing, are nothing.
which is hard to find cos most remote places have a certain beauty.
which scottish city does everyone shit on? dundee?
Not far from the Trossachs, which is beautiful, nice little villages and towns around it, town's perfectly servicable with some nice pubs 'cause of the University, at least one quality distillery nearby, decent castle and monument, the castle from Monty Python's Holy Grail up the road, Glasgow and Edinburgh relatively commutable.
My pick would be Runcorn. Or the other one. Warrington. Had one awful night out in each. Shit, ugly towns, awful accent, extremely fighty, just far enough from Liverpool & Manchester to feel isolated and embittered.
Also Carlisle, the anus of the Lake District.
for that stretch of the motorway between Liverpool and Manchester which looks exactly like hell.
Just because people from Manchester never shut up about how much better it is than everywhere else.
so even somewhere remote, you could do lots of nice country walks. Shitholes are often near large vibrant cities. So it would need to be somewhere remote but not beautiful, and a shithole surrounded by other shitholes.
It's got the word 'cunt' in it for a start.
That sucked balls.
I also had to go to Derry several times a week a few years back, but I very quickly grew to love the place. Never did get to meet our v own MissBass though :(
but every time i go up for work i cannot wait to leave
I was just enjoying the Simpsons reference
i think i'd rather be dead than have to spend a year in either of them. think i hate Rugby more though.
like Workington or Sandwich
Cardiff seems okay though...
That said, I had a horrible time in Nottingham when i was there once. Probably more due to the fact I was down for an interview when I worked in Games and I was a fresh grad. They flew me down at 6 in the morning and my interview was at 3pm so I spent the day wandering, nervous as fuck and last minute studying in what felt like the most depressing place ever.
Manchester also has a horrible place in my heart. I moved there having never been on a weeks notice for a cracking job. Still the best most creative job I have ever had (Coding bespoke VR solutions with a heap of cool tech, haptics, tracking, stereo headsets/projection systems back in the day)
I was 20 though and knew no one, was the youngest at work by over 10 years and ended up in a shit flatshare. Never really gave it a chance to be honest but the last 6 months of my year there were grim. I am sure it is great really if you do it right.
whatchagonnado when it comes for you
Some dull characterless dormitory town in the south east
I'm going to pay £300 a month to specifically avoid living in London (trains)
Crewe and Swindon look like utter holes from what you can see out of the train window but that doesn't really count.