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Does your house have a name?
Did your parents?
Shall I name my house?
Looking back now, the day I worked out that that was just a really fucking terrible pun was probably the moment my childhood ended.
just a stupid cunting name I'd tip all your letters into a septic tank.
Stupid fucking housename twats.
THE OLD RECTORY
THE CINNAMONS (it’s just a lovely ingredient)
Can't mess about on this one, Lynn.
I think I'm just going to call it, 'Ye House'
after a line in a John Clare poem.
Pretty sweet huh?
had a sign outside saying "Girldley Woods". Apparently my uncle got tongue-tied during his wedding vows & mispronounced "worldly goods", so my dad, being king of the bantz, had a sign made.
but some cunt's address is like
Mr and Mrs Dunno
nr Phyllis St Edmundsbury
because it doesn't all show up through the little window on the envelope and they can fuck off.
and there's always one twat with an extra line making it not fit
also dislike the people with the really short addresses so the 2Dear Mr and Mrs Dunno" bit appears in the window too, looks rubbish.
there's a postcode, you dont need to write directions on the envelope
that said i used to have a job where i sent a lot of stuff to Sudan (pre split), and there were a lot of addresses i had to use that were like "behind the petrol stations"
if i had an imagination i'd think of a really good one, or steal one of Alan Partridge's idea. maybe i'll sell the naming rights to a local company.
is the old house on awkward hill in nempnet thrubnell
My parent's house has a name that is descriptive of its former use, and is on a patchy rural street where they all have names because they're not regular enough for numbers.
Oh wait, I think you dropped this: '
My parents never owned property and lived in London throughout my life so no names were to be had.
My mum thinks it's twee enough to satisfy her aspiration to live in a village. My dad doesn't. I don't include it when I send a letter as they've a perfectly fine first line address.
(there's no pear tree either)
we didn't have pound coins either.
I'm going to slap a rustic oak sign with some twee name on my gaff.
Reckon it'll add at least 20k to the value.
hate houses with names, unless they are properly historic
The general rule for naming your home is as follows: If your property has already been designated a number, you must display the house number clearly within the boundary of the property and always use the house number in your address line. You can then also choose to use any house name you like without notifying the the post office or local council as long as you use your house number in your address line. For example if your house number is 20 and you decide to name your house 'The Laurels', the address line should always be as follows:
20 Anywhere Street,
If your property already has an existing house name and NO house number allocated and you wish to change the name of the property, permission must be sought from the Post Office and Your Local Council first. - You will also need to notify your local council of your intention of changing the house name in writing before you can use the new house name for your address.
In the case of addresses where there is no number allocated, the registered house name forms part of the official address. - In this instance property owners wishing to change their property name should put a request in writing to: Royal Mail Address Maintenance Unit, Sunderland, SR3 3XW, Telephone: 08456 045060, Email: firstname.lastname@example.org AND also their local Council's department responsible for street naming and numbering.
The request should state your full name, the present full address of the property and state clearly the new preferred name. The property owner must contact the Royal Mail Address Maintenance Unit to see if the name is satisfactory, then the new address needs to be registered by the Royal Mail Address Maintenance Unit. If there is an issue with your preferred name, they will ask you choose an alternative name.
It is the responsibility of property owners to inform their own personal contacts and relevant council services of any official change or addition to address. Various councils have different rules and procedures to change an existing house name, so it is wise to first check on your local council website about their procedures and regulations before you order a house sign with your new chosen house name.
If a property in the local neighbourhood already has the same name that you have chosen, or if it sounds similar, you may not be able to use the house name because it could cause confusion to the post office, emergency personnel or council workers. - It is worthwhile just taking a walk around your local neighbourhood making notes of existing house names and thinking of several alternatives before applying to the Council. Some Councils charge a registration fee for their service and some don't.