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i just completed goldeneye on 00 agent, feeling very accomplished.
gonna do some work for a few hours and go check out some really lou dbands at the unicorn later.
Time for some extreme parameter-based fun!
although seems like all you can really do is make stuff super easy or hard?
Not played it in years, but seem to remember it was fun to try one-shot-kills games (where you crank enemy health right down and their damage and accuracy way up...). Another version is to do the same, but turn their reaction speed right down, and then try to do a level with just bare hands /a knife.
and then turn on the cheats to give yourself and them all rocket launchers. EXPLOSIONS.
and bored of the constant knock backs. How come some knobheads just get life handed to them on a plate and i'm stuck fumbling around trying to eat with my hands.
feel guilty getting any attention because loads of people have it worse.
you're allowed to be unhappy with your lot. you're applying for new jobs and stuff right? that's always depressing as fuck, just gotta keep plowing through and you'll land on your feet eventually.
sorry for ruining the saturday thread :D
you're allowed to be sad, but don't give up hope! you never know what tomorrow will bring!
you know sometimes when i am feeling crap about everything i watch david hasselhoff videos on youtube and it makes me feel a bit better.
woke up super late, had a lazy breakfast, went shopping and bought a shed-load of stuff for my holiday (2 working days to go!!!!!!11!1!). now i am making a playlist for my holiday and thinking about cooking up some chili. later going to drink cocktails with my palz.
woke up at 11, went for a run and made a super-double-mega-breakfast
(see running thread)
but good job.
and I've not really started looking for somewhere yet. Also, people will start looking round here soon so there's loads of cleaning/sorting to do. So, I'm just ignoring all that and watching the rugby because #yolo
affordable tailoring, or like semi-tailored suits. anyone have any recos or can find the trhead?
were pretty good imo.
london will have more options though probs
Wearing a ridiculously over the top play suit dress thing. Not sure how he'll react...
went to look at a flat, first place i've seen and its perfect, right by the river (the place in the whole world I am most fond of), 10 minutes walk from station and town, own garage, amazinig view, private gardens and access to the river (seriously considering buying a canoe and rowing 5 minutes to this pub on the river bank), 5 minute drive from my family, only £20 fees. Just hope it doesn't fall through.
don't know, I don't drink though
And a few chimney bleus with a friend. Can't believe it's dinner time. Where does time go?
because my GF doesn't like roast lamb (!?). starting to smell proper naughty
then gonna go to the shop and get myself a lovely, lovely pizza
it's my favourite place
Don't know why people bother keeping up the pretence of liking someone, go out of their way to make it known and stuff then just sever all ties all of a sudden over something stupid. Legitimately hate all men.
Sent me a message about some beef off here from weeks ago and I can't even work out why they've linked to a thread/what it's supposed to mean. Can't even reply cause I think they've unfollowed me or something. Pure sad.
it's just bizarre that multiple men off here have imagined that I've 'defended' him. Where have I ever done that? Literally the person who has defended the woman involved in the whole thing more than anyone else on here. When she was being attacked by shitheads on here and people were calling her mad and vindictive I don't remember any of them saying anything supportive or helpful at all. Got a bunch of weird messages about it.
i used the word vindictive but Also defended her! How very dare you!
eltham sent me a link to this thread http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4460204#r8486249 and told me i was a failure.
dont know what he said to get it deleted in the first place or anything. did he say something really creepy again "as a joke".
If you like yeah x
Have that horrible day time drinking feeling. Withdrawing from alcohol is just super depressing but I can't really stay in by mysf maintaining level f drunkness. Need to read a bunch of reports tomorrow thoughsk idk
There's just two problems: a) I'm not too sure I'm any good and b) I think maybe music is boring
if you thought were good you'd probably be a twat
and b) making it not boring is the goal
so i'm considering just not turning up. what do you think will happen? also got a video thing to do wanna die fuck off
If anyone's not seen Cucumber yet I'd recommend it. Starts off pretty standard fun Russell T Davies fare but has gotten trippy and brutal fast. Some properly good writing.
See ya later
every now and again i think of that guy in the seven up series who dropped out of uni and ended up homeless for a few years and it fills me with dread
wish i was going out tonight instead of tomorrow. sunday night's the only time i ever feel motivated to do work
I'm hoping the new independent travel, and the having the driving test and all that outta the way means I can think about sorting out a cool future / job relevant to my degree / social life or something.
I manage to be downbeat about everything. Gimme a subject and I'll be downbeat about it.
would be better us both being here in my tiny houseshare being poor and happy than us both being lonely and miserable. can two people live off of £1,100 per month?
If it's just after rent, still yes but it'd be a bit of a stretch some months.
that is my monthly wages
have about 1000 euros left after all rent, bills and tax. i dont pay for transport and its easy to walk / skip the tram fare. just need to stop eating in the canteen (5 per day) and buying coffee. dont need to buy any new clothes or shoes for ages.
one person live off 500 euros a month after rent, bills and tax?
but you can never eat out, never buy anything non-essential, never travel home, never go the cinema, never replace anything likes plates/towels/bedding, never buy clothes, never drink,..I mean, I could go on.
but sex is free, the internet is free, nature is free etc.
only really a matter of whether your relationship is strong enough to survive being broke and skint all the time. Can he not work there though?
its difficult if you dont speak french or dutch though. pretty much everywhere expects two or three languages. definitely think we'd manage being skint though, we're both really skint right now and life's too short.
worried about everyday things like conversation but then now i'm now i'm tired and will fall asleep
also talking about how you're tired is a instantly relatable confersartion piece to fall back on and you can know where to put your hands (rubs eyes)
went through a phase a few years ago of saying 'i'm tired' as an anxious conversation habit even when i wasn't tired
when i'm tried for real i feel feerless. might be why those people fall off scaffolding
really need to start going to bed much earlier on weeknights, can't keep doing this 6 hours per night shit
GOOD: bridesmaids dress looks nice, been invited to the hen weekend, got an idea for my best mate's birthday present for next month, had Lebanese food, got a day of lazing around watching football tomorrow
BAD: Angels drew against a relegation zone club, on the drive home listening to BBC Radio Kent the guy i fancied (/stalked) when i was 12 was one of the commentators - reminded me that so many people i fancied in the past are now successful in fields I would like to be successful in (working for the BBC, writing for a national newspaper, winning awards for writing plays...) and i feel inadequate and unsuccessful and really envious that they clearly haven't had their professional lives/career goals fucked about with by crippling depression and anxiety issues :/ rubbish uni years seriously killed my motivation for everything and now i don't think i'll achieve anything in my professional life. esp as I no longer want to pursue my long-term goal (journalism). no idea what to do with my life :(
I watched Frances Ha today. Really good, understated character study, and the ending moved me even more 'n it did the first time I saw it I think. Made me miss having a social life and in-jokes with friends and stuff, though.
I do stuff like going to gigs and the cinema on my own, I think it's the doing nothing and talking nonsense with people that I miss. Hope all's good with you anyway, maaaaan.
Brutal work at an open day. Explaining to people why they need A-Levels and GCSEs to get on courses gets a bit wearing after the 6th hour. Listening to Cat Stevens and drinking tea as I'm mega ill and went out last night. Got a friend request from a girl I fancy but shes mega unphotogenic which makes me fancy her more, which is weird.
I was gonna go out but I'm too tired and just can't be bothered. Wanted to go to Retrospectacular but it's an hour away and I can't really afford to go out two nights in a row anyway.
i want to sleep.. why won't you let me sleep??
I'm still working
I have been working all day FOR FREE
and the dog keeps fucking farting
seeing Craig painting mannequins in his workshop made me imagine S_a_d painting Warhammer figures.
- really sore and can't take anymore painkillers
+ i had a migraine and the pills have just took the edge off it so i need to go to bed to try and fall asleep asap
- my hearings gone all funny and i'm dizzy and feel sick
+ i got an £8 tip at work
in conclusion: might go and read a book in bed
But one mate left at 10 and the other left about 11 to get the last DLR. As if DLR is a thing. Guess I'll get an early night then.
like the train equivalent of sitting at the top front on a double decker bus
i don't really know what the DLR is, i think i got it once about 15 years ago
just got a phone call from my eldest sis, one of those ones with the calm, serious voice that you dread. she asked me to put our mum on, I knew what it would be. of our two aunties, the one our mum got on with passed a few years ago, and now the one our mum was estranged from passed.
until our other auntie's funeral, this auntie was just an unseen apparition. hadn't seen her since I was a toddler. saw her a few times since; it was strange, to see this reflection of my mum and my other auntie, in the way she looked and acted.
the side of her that made my mum excommunicate her became clear, but still, she was family. and she was lonely in her last years, lost her husband, my cousin Chris didn't see her much because I think he resented the way she was to him. and our other auntie had passed, of course.
my mum took it exactly as I expected, at least from how she responded to the call in the immediacy. no surprise, no sadness, just as if it was anything else. stoic, matter of fact. just as if the she'd been informed the days for different refuse collections had been changed around, something that ordinary.
don't really know how I feel. the usual background family melancholy elevated some notches above the usual level, I guess.
i hope you're ok xx
thank you xx
Fuck off forever lousy winter months, survived another year, in your face.
I'm gonna do some ironing and make a coconut curry and text a bloke about a spare room and watch the rugby.
that's all really. Might start an application for a masters degree.
V much looking forward to hopefully quitting my job in about a month. Not sure how that's gonna look on my cv but DONT CARE
I was looking for a sunday thread to rant in so this one will do.
So yesterday went to see a 2 bedroom flat, it was completely perfect and it would be extremely hard to find somewhere as cool as that (see upthread). we told the landlord we almost certainly wanted it and would confirm today. this morning I get a message from my future housemate saying he has checked his current contract and he can't move out until the end of may, and he doesn't want to discuss it with his current landlord as they recently got rid of another tennant because of his noise complaints.
this in itself is fine, people make mistakes, but what has really annoyed me is the way he just sent the message saying he couldnt take the place and ended it with saying he hasn't slept so he is going to sleep now, meaning he just dropped this bombshell but wasn't up for discussing it. I think it is worth exploring, the landlord will have to fill the room at the end of may instead of the end of march, would he really be losing out enough to care, he got 10 months rent out of him already. also there were lots of problems with his current place, which a lot of tenants would not put up with that I think would give him a lot of leverage.
while I think what he says is true, I am also quite a paranoid person. we saw the place, both really wanted it, did all the sums but he kept saying we should wait a day to confirm (where as my instinct was just nailed down asap), which makes me wonder if there is something else going on and he might have come up with this as a get out. I have had really flakey housemates in the past that were a nightmare, and this has really set my flakiness radar off big time.
the whole thing is really awkward because I am pretty annoyed with him (but pathologically incapable of expressing that to someone in person), he is about 1/3 of the people I regularly hang out with so don't really want to fall out with him, but it really has put me off the whole thing. so now I back to the situation of needing to move out but not wanting to live alone but not wanting to live with strangers when yesterday everything was looking up.
Am I over reacting? I myself find it really difficult to confront awkward situations, as evidenced by the fact I haven't tried to phone him to sort it out, so maybe should cut him some slack in how he handled this.
he didnt want to sign yesterday until he checked his contract, after doing so hes found out its not possible until May.
not really flakiness.. just not great at communicating, like you seem to be (tbh)
youre not really over reacting though.. its frustrating finding somewhere to live and finding decent people to live with.
if he's your mate give him a break imo.
yeah I suppose, but it is not like we would have signed yesterday it was just telling the landlord we wanted it (things can always fall through after that, references checks, notice dates etc). and there is the slight inconsistency in that the other day he was saying it was good timing as if we took it he could tell his landlord not to evict this other noisey person on his account, where as now that is a past tense thing that has happened and means he can't even ask the landlord about moving a bit early which makes me wonder if it might be an excuse (to me the noisy tenant is a non issue, no other tenants past or future should have to put up with that anyway so it is a issue the landlord would have had to deal with regardless). I recognise I am the kind of paranoid person that thinks the worse, but it still puts me off as two avoidant communicators living together does not bode well.
it's at least worth him asking, if the landlord says no, no big deal. good chance they wont care.
yeah thats my view, which makes me wonder if there is something else going on. his reasoning is about another tenant being evicted because of his complaint, but to me that should not be an issue as any future tenant would also have similar issues so that the landlord. to me it is worth asking, and putting not wanting things to be awkward with a soon to be ex landlord, over losing this place and messing me about, is what has really annoyed me.
ok so he replied eventually and explained the situation more, turns out he has actually already discussed it with his landlord who is being firm, and there are some other unexpected financial issues so I jumped the gun a bit and was being a bit paranoid.
my friend invited me to live with him when he moves, i'd really like to but can't for secret relationship reasons. he's gonna think what you're thinking now and he's right to think that
its probably fine as it is in the future, its not like you've found a place and said you want to take it. Just tell them you've had a think about it and realised you can't move at that time
i am meant to go for a 10km run this afternoon but i'm so tired and can't really be bothered. apart from that i have to clean the apartment and pack my suitcase and skype my mum.
it only takes half hour
i used it as an excuse to have a bath <3
no it's not