The Big Toe in a Suit astounds the footballing world once more with his amazing black satchel of football tactics.
Bobby Manc gets a ball in the face.
Messi saves Luis Enrique's bacon and then reveals he'd rather eat a tramp's anus warmed up than sign for Chelsea.
Shagger Pards downs Spurs.
Bony Wilf off to City for £25m.
Wiggy Boys lose again.