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my day>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>your day
and there was this first year lad there who nobody knows that well and he spent the whole night not talking to anyone (which is fair enough really)
but then near the end he came up to me with a big grin on his face and went 'that guy is a bellend!' and pointed at my mate who was at the other side of the room and then he high fived me. bizarre
self-inflicted peer damage. he'll go far
Something something unchecked immigration
Black wings, white scapular patches, white neck, yellow/red beak. Stork. Ffs.
Sorry for doubting your ornithological expertise, Loui!
you are forgiven, however, as I have been blessed with this sign from the Almighty
MARLON: Roscoe there is something I have wondered and that has preyed on my mind like a lion if my mind was a desert chicken
ROSCOE: Hang on let me just finish ironing these potatoes for dinner... there we go... now what it is that troubles you, young man
MARLON: Well Roscoe there are so many people now having babbies. The maternity ward is always full of babies an--
ROSCOE: Why are you walking in maternity wards?
MARLON: It is my special shortcut to the newsagents, you can shave off two minutes from the journey if you climb out of the maternity ward winder. But anyway please do not interrupt me Roscoe a smuch as I respect your interjections
ROSCOE: I am a sorry man
MARLON: Anyway. All the babbies being born, yet I never do see a stork. Or at least very rarely and even then often just mulched up on the front of a reckless van. SO HELEN AND OLLY ANSWER ME THIS WHAT IS THE EXPLANSION
ROSCOE: You really are a foolish boy Marlon with your lack of knowledge re colon the facts of life, re colon the fundamentals of nature and of human reproduction
MARLON: Oh is there something I have missed in my ongoing calculation via my perception of this the world in which we live and of its myriad physical laws
ROSCOE: Yes you dolt. I cannot begin to even comprehend how you get this far without knowing
MARLON: Oh do tell me
ROSCOE: I just have to exhale away the geists of my disbelief. (exhale)
MARLON: Oh please the suspense is having a poo in my heart
ROSCOE: Ok -- ok
MARLON: Come on come on I must know
ROSCOE: Well Marlon, the truth -- as any lad of your age should know -- is...
MARLON: what is it be?
ROSCOE: ... the storks they have underground tunnels and they transport the babbies that way. It is much safer that way because then they can't drop the babbies and inadvertently kill innocent grounded people
MARLON: Ah I see and that explains why there are sewers
a classic of the genre
ALAN YENTOB: Welcome to Imagine with my Alan Yentob. Today it is a documentary all about M-B. So M-B... care to illuminate us all
M-B: Well I start the day off with a packet of Mission Deli wraps. That keeps me energised so I can think of ideas and then eat more Mission Deli wraps later on in the day
ALAN YENTOB: So how does a master auteur unwind
M-B: Usually with some Mission Deli wraps
ALAN YENTOB: You understand that it is Mission deli wraps, not Mission Deli wraps
M-B: OK you get out
here you see it approaching the houseboat
here you see it atop the houseboat, front right
here you see it approaching the houseboat, lamentably semi-obscured by a lamp-post owing to the cruelties of timing. its right wing is nonetheless visible and unmistakably storkish
I think where you live is haunted
the principies naturae of lux reflectae! inverted through the partial mirror of a translucent surface at an angle proximal to the Transient! that Ghost was no Ghost! twas a Murderer, Within, whom I subsequently Thwarted with a Prong
MASON: Hey what's going on
DIXON: Why-aye mate
the photos show a white stork...but the tail is black. White storks should have a white tail!
Not being racist or anything, but...they couldn't have been CRANES, right? that'd be even madder
The photos make it look way too small to be a stork in the first place.
I was on the 10th storey
now seriously doubting they were White Storks, coz of the tail
No birds, though.
might go and vandalise it
give me a house
i went to the northumberland show and it was good as thats 100% my ideal past time except for compared to my local agricultural show it was about 1/6th the size and just nowhere near as good. made me really want to go to mine but i can't go to it this year for the first time in ages which is so sad. or i could just go to it actually but i don't have the spare plane money. actually i might go
hog roast is a pound more expensive too and they don't have as good toilets and 2 bits of fudge was 2.50 and there was no young farmers tent/diorama. and the animal selection was poor. just a few rabbits in a tent + dogs+ horses+ cows+ sheep but not a lot of any of them. just lacked the spark i'm used to. 6/10
sorry to put a downer on your day
that is where one of my clients lives. i live in a basement somewhere near woolwich
my day >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> their day
Egyptian fucken Goose
a roe deer, a jay, a red kite eating roadkill, a pheasant and a flying stag beetle
but no storks
~confirmed~ this time. sevenoaks wildlife reserve. the ibis is quite the draw