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they shouldn't be fucking trusted under any circumstances.
i know adults not being adults is a sore subject for you.
i'm pretty content rn. not sure i need the approval of the kirk van houten's of the world :')
Do YOU sleep in a racing car bed?
just realised recently that quite a few of my mates earn good money and prefer to live in squalor so they can spend their wages on boozing it up.
stuff like getting your own place, be it alone, with a partner, even with one mate or something, doing it up, being a bit houseproud, that's nice, isn't it? being, say, 35, sharing a bathroom with six other people, sleeping on a mattress on the floor, getting pissed every night still, that's grim.
Something i've noticed generally - pleasant, bright people who are 30, 35, older and still choose to live like students despite having well-paid jobs.
As i said, thread wasn't designed to be a pop at you, dunno why you'd think it would be.
about houseshares in this ITT.
But for the record I actually agree with you.
Shows what I know.
Went to view a flat yesterday and it was completely different to the pictures so was like ERRRR NO then the letting agent said "oh that ones round the corner, jump in the car and Ill take you there"! 30 minutes later we end up miles away....in a shared house.....with about 5 students. I should have bashed her face in for the insult.
"pictures for illustrative purposes only. actual property may differ." on them
WHAT EVEN IS THE POINT
How far into the 30 minutes was it before you became concerned?
but Im far too trusting and polite to question a professional
and made a point of how 'not London' it was? I mean I'd have thought 30 minutes driving in Leeds would get you halfway out the back end of Bradford, for example.
We dont all spend our life in the same place
i've always felt sorry for people trying hard to do 'adult' things to prove something to themselves
A lot of people just "climb life's ladder" (mortgage, marriage, career) just because they're too unimaginative to do owt else.
Note I said "a lot" and not everyone, don't all have a pop.
Jeez. I'd rather move to the other end of the country and have my own place at that age than still live in London and be in a flatshare or something at 35.
look, i'm a live and let live guy generally, just a bit weird how people who can afford to be independent would choose not to be. the difference in cost between a houseshare and a small rented place of your own isn't relative to the advantages, just don't get it.
i dunno, i suspect some people are absolutely shit scared of their own company, and/or want to prolong thier youth as long as they can. perhaps both are understandably.
maybe they're just saving up to buy somewhere? you pay a pretty solid premium to live alone.
Houseshares, even in 'orrible houses, more than it would cost for a housing association property, or even getting a mortgage. I know people who pay, say, £400-£500 a month plus bills to have a boxroom in a six-tennant house. To me that's madness.
I think anyone who thinks there is some difference is probably a bit of a weirdo.
i'm not ageist...just suspicious of people who get to midde-age and don't want a bit of their own space.
you have your own space in a shared house.
but you don't have your own personal space. if the fella next door drops his arse in his sleep, or the woman downstairs is on the job then you'll know about it. you can't be the king of your castle.
there's loads of benefits to having a shared space. I wouldn't live in such an awesome house if I lived alone.
- how much do you pay?
- how many people live in your house?
- how much would it cost you for a small one-bedroom flat in the same area?
- almost double and it'd probably be a shit heap
Yeah. But housing is a big issue here (and most places) so I'd need to be at risk to even be considered for housing through an association.
you do know housing associations are different to council housing, right?
anyway, it's irrelevant, completely. I love where I live and who I live with.
i'm suspicious of adults who don't want to self-improve. you've got to have targets, man. if you're still showering with the pubes of four other people when you're 30 or 35 then you (generally speaking, not you, obviously) need to have a look at yourself.
What's significant about those ages?
I would absolutely hate to worry about such trivial things. It's just a fucking age.
y'know, settle down, grow old with someone, own your own bricks and mortar, etc?
but 30? Fuckin' hell, give me a chance.
each to their own, but i think people (generally) ought to have some sort of idea what they'd like to do with their lives by that age. idk, just think it'd be really hard to start thinking of buying a house when you're, say, 40, especially having not saved money for a number of years. i used to think people who bought houses at, say, 20 were sad bastards, but the reverse is true really. who's that guy on here who paid his house off by 31? imagine the freedom that must bring. great stuff.
Swings and roundabouts innit. We all come from different backgrounds, different things motivating us in life. Different upbringings. Some people who have grown up in very unsettled backgrounds might just desire some security in life. Maybe the fact I grew up in a stable, two-parent home means I'm more willing to seek out the bright lights and a bit of fun. Perhaps.
my friend bought a house when he was 24. It's caused him nothing but misery and he never has money to do fun things.
also don't like living alone though
isn't really a houseshare though is it?
Who refer to their "housemates"
said he lived with a couple called Bev and Sam. He was in his 40s and Bev and Sam were his parents. I think he works on the fish counter now
Lots of benefits and can't think of the cons. Maybe bringing a girl back and my flatmate is on the sofa. "Shall we just go to my bedroom?", "Sure". THANKS FLATMATE.
none of the complicated politics and mess of living in a big flatshare, all the benefit of having someone to chat to etc. i would definitely go quite mental if i lived totally alone.
costs a bit cheaper, you have some company, but you can still make the rules. you have your own space and personal space and if not it's easy to resolve issues. no waits for bathrooms or shit like that, but a bit of noise so it's not weird. aye, that's fine. i just don't understand people who live five or six to a house when they could do this for marginally more money and it be more convenient in numerous ways.
If I had five or six people here I wouldn't need to work.
dreading it, can't be arsed living with some other cunt. What if he's a prick.
and you end up marrying him?
and knowing how to cook and everything and I'll just be the clueless undeveloped weirdo no life skills despite being the same age
nobody under about 40 can cook. lots of people pretend they can. that weird superiority thing again, but in reality nobody cooks from scratch except on special occasions, they all stick a frozen pizza in the over, make some pasta, go to the chipp like you and i do. don't worry about it.
I take it you live alone?
so it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world to still be here in my 30s. It's fun having a group of friends at hand you can watch Game of Thrones/watch the footy/go to the cinema/go to the pub with rather than having to organise to meet someone who lives 2 tube lines away.
I think it'd be weird though if you're 30 and you're one of those housemates who skulks around in a dressing gown not talking to anyone. If I had one of those in my house I would probably confront him and ask them what they're doing with their life. If it turns out to be me then I hope to have the self-awareness to move on to a better existence.
move to London and get a flat with me so I can get the hell out of here.
i know you find it hard to accept that we're not all giant babies, and that you're angry at me because i'm younger than you, but accept yourself, you'll finish college at some point.
as if you're younger than me.
They all cook really nice stuff from scratch all the time.
And then get pissed and laugh about how they don't spend all their wages on rent and council tax and energy bills.
(two of us are still in our 20s so we're fine) did all this great cooking for the first few weeks and I felt like a proper loser just making pasta or sausage and beans all the time. Ever since like a month or two after we moved in they both just have like pizza all the time. Proper cooking is definitely too much effort for anyone to keep up.
with montages of you learning how to boil an egg and accidentally dying all the clothes pink and then you'll shrug and laugh together at your hopelessness and then one day you'll bake a cake and clean the bathroom all on your own and it'll be a heartwarming coming-of-age moment
Mid fucking thirties though? Still a child!
would prefer the dynamic of living with someone more outgoing than me.
also had the chance to live with 5 other people but they all play musical instruments and weren't planning on getting a tv, that would've been hell on earth
each to their own. just a bit bored and seeing if the auld fishing rod still works. been thinking about moving in with this bird from work (not Jean, she left last winter after drunkenly ploughing her Fiat Uno into the village post office) who lets out her spare rooms. i could half my rent and cut my bills by two thirds. in theory, could save in the very least half of my wages every month. in reality, think it could be a bit depressing having less space and freedom, so i'd probably just drink most of that.
Fraught with danger that one surely?
Living in houseshares in their 30s out of choice. More due to cost or not wanting to waste loads of money to pay to live on their own (which to me would be lonely and not worth the extra cost). Living with randoms would be grim, living
with mates would be ok as long as it didn't descend into student squalor. Each to their own big guy
Living with my parents is loads better than some grotty houseshare. My mum's actually such a laugh and it's been great getting to hang out with her all the time and I'll cherish the next few months for the rest of my life.
and it was great. I totally agree, if you have a good relationship with your parents it's fantastic. My Dad passed away unexpectedly less than 3 months after I left, so maybe I'm putting an elegiac tint on it, but I'm so glad I got to spend some proper time with my parents as proper adults. Totally different dynamic, it was fun and pretty much totally stress free.
Nowt wrong with moving back to the parental nest to recharge/plan what you want to do next.
how horrible the very idea of an Other
I'm 24 but I've done everything late in life, and protracted university stuff means I'm still an undergrad, in my 2nd year. I live with one other person and it's brilliant, the flat is lovely. My flatmate is really nice, she works a lot so we're not always around at the same time which works for me, but when she's here she's nice to chat to.
I'm worried about next year, as neither of us can really afford to keep living here, and my flatmate wants to live with other friends in an area I really don't wanna live in. I previously lived with eight other people and I hated it, I felt like a guest in my own home- I'm really worried about being in a situation like that again. It's pretty much my worst nightmare to have to be living like that in 7-10 years time. Also, every guy I've ever lived with has been a passive aggressive prick and really unhygienic, but a lot of women seem to just want to live with other women (according to Gumtree ads etc, for the same reasons I expect) which makes it difficult to find housemates I can stand.
Another big issue I have with most houseshares is the fact that they're in big Victorian houses with high ceilings, very damp and cold. It amazes me how many people are content with living in fucking horrible houses. I'm really affected by the environment I live in, I can't feel happy in an oppressively dark and cold house. Another thing is room size- why are people obsessed with having large bedrooms? I feel like the only person under 40 who uses their bedroom mainly for sleeping, rather than as a living space/place where they eat meals. As long as there is decent storage space/a double bed the room can be as small as possible. And flats without a living room can fuck off.
So while I'm enjoying my flatshare at the moment, I do think it's weird when proper adults with salaries live in houseshares. I definitely couldn't do it. I wonder if men are more likely to do this than women.
well i suppose i could live on my own somewhere but at the mo i share with two others (and have a 10 minute walk to work) in a decent space big enough to house of the stuff i can buy with the money saved from not spending £350 a week to live on my own in literally a shipping container. LONDON.
for the five or so decades of the rest of your life is 'freedom'
We can't all post threads about insects. The important thing is you tried.
I'm planning on moving to the big smoke this year (been saying that for years but finally debt free). I'm in the house share dilemma. I'm 33, could probably just about afford a tiny studio but wouldn't leave much spending money ( and I tend to spend a lot), and I did it once at uni and pretty much lost the ability to speak. Would prefer a house share with the right people but that's pretty tricky, think I am exactly the kind of weird silent housemate people (including myself) want to avoid. Those 'we enjoy socialising over a glass of wine' ads make me recoil (which I guess is their purpose), kind of want to put an ad up to find similarly weird but not too weird housemates 'enjoy socialising rarely and only over msn, in seperate rooms doing are own things' (msn reference shows how long it's been since my last house share). Also would be too self conscious to play musical instruments (and wouldn't want to annoy people) in a house share, as it's my only interest/hobby that's a big concern. Might have to opt for one of those studios where all the pictures are taken with a fish eyed lens (dunno what they try and achieve with that)
but if you aren't in a hurry to move you can always hang on til you find a really good one. i lived in places where i had a massive room that i treated like a studio flat and didn't rely much on the shared stuff. one place i had a whole floor to myself. those are pretty rare and you'll have to see a million shit places first but they do exist.
...and then sub-let? This means you get to pick who you live with and also gives you a degree of leverage as you are sort of the landlord.
I am sure we know loads of people this age living in houseshares, it is just the way it is. But when does it get a bit weird? 40, 50? How about a group of 65 year old lads living together? I lived in shared houses until I finished Uni then moved straight in with my girlfriend at the time, we are still together and I am 30 now. God knows what I would have done otherwise, I like to think I would have got a 1 bed flat somewhere and lived on lentils, had no TV and washed in a sink to save money. I doubt it though and just moved in with some Uni razzclarts and watched them play GTA every night on the TV while swigging back tins of Fosters.
If you've split up with a partner and / or are single, what are you meant to do? Spend £1200 (plus bills) to live in a studio flat by yourself in case someone judges you?
everyone over 30 is in both a relationship and a steady job.
I now spend £450 (plus bills) to live in a nice two bed flat by myself.
in brixton & surrounding i'd say
for £1,400 and that ain't even in Londres. Not that anyone has taken it yet...
I'm only 24 but I'm thinking about moving into a place alone.
Last six months lived with 3 other people (two of them being a couple) and it's not working. It's definitely financially do-able.
My parents seem to think this is incredibly sad, I'm not sure. Is it?
but, specifically, everyone over 30 that i've shared a house with has been, yes, odd
It's alright as a student, but at my age I'd feel so on edge having to share that much personal space with people. What happens if you want to do something like have a dinner party or have the in laws over?