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People you haven't seen for years? Or is that some kind of disgusting mental illness?
I don't think it's weird. Regardless of him being a cheating bellend, I really thought we'd settle down together and I still have love for him.
He was a right knob, none of my mates liked him which should have been a sign...but you know you get caught up in it all
Unless you just mean a sort of general fondness or something? I was a cheating arsehole after about six years of going out with someone, but we were ridiculously young and it was probably for the best - its been another six years since and while we've always got time for a chat and a hug when our paths cross, it's purely platonic and not strange or anything.
I thought I still really liked someone from years ago and met them recently and they were very disappointing. I think if you keep thinking about them now and again over a long period of time you almost create a separate person in your head that only has some similarities to the actual person. It's possible to still love someone after a long time but it's hard to know if you would still like them if you met them. Time changes people innit
and whether or not you still have those qualities, or whether you've actually changed quite a bit from another person's perspective, but not realised, because you're ALWAYS there and it's difficult to have any perspective?
I used to be very quite and reserved when I was younger. I would not open up until I got to know someone well and it seemed to work out for me. Someone told me recently that I need to stop putting myself down in public and joking about myself, it might be honest and shows a comfort with yourself but doesn't get you anywhere. I am completely oblivious to how I act in certain ways around others.
I would prefer to be like I was before but it isn't really me anymore. The friends I have now are the friends I have made since college and they would have never seen the quite me, I enjoy their company so maybe this is now the person that I wanted to be when I was younger?
I think the core values I had when I was younger have not changed but I have changed in my confidence and forwardness.
as long as it doesn't go too far and you properly dismantle yourself before others.
I was much less inhibited before, but I can't be certain how gradually I've become the way I am. and I wonder if I made friends when I was more extroverted who I might not get on with as well because of how I am now.
also, I've had this defense mechanism for years of subconsciously adapting to other people's personalities in fear of being alienated, which I reckon got a bit beyond its natural use, and started contributing to my alienation, and I've been struggling with my identity for a while.
no one ever measures up to the made-up versions of people you create in your head over time.
dont hurt me
In life after love?
yes. it makes perfect sense. sometimes it's chemestry and not at all logic.
it does NOT necessarily mean it's a good idea.
Quick shag? could be beautiful. shotgun wedding? avoid at all costs.
but, you know, if you start hanging out and things are good and nothing seems amiss...well, i hate to say it, but it might be meant to be.
just thinking about someone I had a crush on at a previous job.
To be fair, this was sometime after I'd watched Her, so loneliness has established itself as a pretty big theme of this weekend.
it may be a part of it, but I definitely don't think it's completely due to nostalgic distortions and the like
It's not this anyway.
it depends who.
romantically i think youl always feel something for your first love. its natural
WILL ALWAYYYYYYYYYSSSSS LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOUOUOUOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
the person you first fall head over heels for (whether it is reciprocated or not) -OR- the first person you mutually date?
why do they always fuck you over?
but the people I fell for after the first person didn't leave a big gaping hole/question mark/annoyance behind for me.
You trust implicitly, it's probably the last of childish innocence and selfishness in a way. Like the naive and selfish idea that your love and devotion is powerful and central enough to the universe to protect something great forever. Don't think you can make that mistake twice in quite the same way
it wasn't mutual and it wasn't a relationship
Irrational, certainly, but then love's irrational.
That and thoughts about how it could've been, what if X hadn't happened, etc, etc.
I think if you haven't managed to have a few stable relationships by your kid twenties you are bound to spend your life alone, it's better to come to terms with that as so as you can
(at least I certainly hope you are).
When you are in your prime with no responsibilities and little baggage, you aren't going to change that later. It's more pragmatic than pessimistic; look after your own self esteem and give up
I have got some work to do before my appearance and personality are up to scratch.
Try not to boost our egos too much now, eh?
else I'm even more terrified than I was before