I can't decide what part of this story is the funniest, everything about it is amazing.
Being a small town journalist must be superb, look at the related stories:
Angus man jailed after topless knife-brandishing episode
Montrose man threatened elderly woman who found him urinating in garden
Arbroath man accused of attacking Chinese takeaway worker
Double-limit drink-driver loses car and licence
Man bit Arbroath home owner’s hand after being found in garden
Arbroath man admits attacking police officer