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"Sources have confirmed that the only people the man has talked to today are movie theater employees."
"Theater employees are reporting the man knew exactly which refreshments to purchase, as though he had done this many times before."
don't understand why its still a joke that its for losers or something
The article is funny because of how ott malicious it is.
but it still relies on the idea that going to the pictures on your own is sad existing somewhere in the world
reminds me of one of my favourites
You can find me at the Peckham Plex at the first screening watching whatever Summer blockbuster for a fiver. Aisle seat. To the left.
This will stop soon once my new job starts. Honest. Like to stress that afterwards I meet LOADS of friends ~6pm in Franks Bar, The Bussey Building, Bar Story, Montpellier, The Vic and so on.
Daredevil - towards the end of it's run. Sat 11am.
There was me watching the film and a teenage couple snogging. Don't think they were pleased when I showed up.
but I went to the 10:50 am hobbit showing and when I got there at 10:55am I automatically said "is there any tickets left for the 10:50am screening". The guy sucked his teeth, ooohed and bit, tapped away and said "YES! A couple have just cancelled their tickets, you want one?" So I thanked him profusely, walked in, and I was the only one there.
top bants by the ticket guy there.
Literally the only person in the screening. It was so much fun.
Me, a friend and a guy who decided to sit on the same row as us.
Watching it in such an empty space made it all the more scarier.
Completely empty screen except for me. Wonderful.
right at the end of its run in cinemas and had the place to ourselves.
only person in there
Was a Friday early afternoon screening, I think I was the only one in the cinema.
had about five people in there, which made watching the endless sex scenes slightly less cringey.
Me, two other lone guys, and one lone woman. Weird and uncomfortable for us all.
It's pretty much sentence after sentence describing the same thing in a slightly different way. That probably doesn't make sense. But the writing used to be a lot more subtle.
the idea that this writer so effortlessly had ways in which to berate the....ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzz
It can get rather tiring if you read it week in, week out. These days, I just dip into it. It's like reading women's magazines or comic books. They tend to repeat themselves after 5-6 years because the readers have moved on and been replaced by the next generation.
could just be me, but I'm sure there's been a change. It used to approach things in the same detached way a newspaper report would - it's still superficially like that but there just seems to be more of a "voice" to a lot of the articles now - one that is actually slightly unlikeable.
I feel like comic book guy overanalysing a xylophone rib in a cartoon.
of the three nerds from the episode where Homer has to go back to University.
You're welcome x
when they stopped publishing their yearbooks/anthologies. Had all of them and they still make me laugh. So cannot really comment on their stuff since.
Won't stop me from speculating that the newer writers have grown up reading and loving The Onion as fans and are writing articles like fanboys. This is a big issue with super-hero comics where fanboys become professional writers and churn out stories they've been working on since the age of 13.
just for their Joe Biden articles:
midnight screening. got really really drugsed beforehand. sat in cinema alone. absolutely terrifying.