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We're in a recession after all, and that is the cheaper option.
your mum's been giving it away as long as I can remember
christians are such losers
(not having sex before marriage), with the worst part about being an Ordinary Joe (not having sex after marriage).
(also, at least one of them is having an affair)
or a wank
Face flushed, penis tumescent, grimly but stoicly munching your way through a whole raw potato.
He should be so lucky.
It's from one of those satire news sites.
like a practise run?
Don't blame it in on the Christianity though, God wants to make some babies!
they are denying their nature, they are denying that they are animals, they are adjudging that animals are wrong, they are adjudging that others are wrong, they are adjudging nature is wrong.
They are perverts
It's a real turn on
then in the 3 minute window provided by her having to towel dry the hair she'd just sprayed he masturbated with the power and fury of a hurricane
can't print that though
That's the most creative euphemism for having a wank I've ever heard.