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'I once bit into a _______, only to discover_______....'
No damage done, but a really horrible crunch and then spat a load of glass on to the plate. Fuck knows how it had got in there.
Obvious go-to herb for chefs trying to look flash: 'fusion cuisine' just means 'coriander on top, 25% surcharge'. Tastes soapy and weird to me.
Deliverance even put it on their Irish stew ffs. Why?
ruins so many dishes.
YUK YUK YUK
I had a proper strop at that, in the middle of the restaurant :D
Mushrooms are a) fucking disgusting and b) not vegetables. I've seen 'Mushroom pakora' listed as a separate option in some places, I certainly do not want or fucking expect them in a veggie pakora.
I would advise checking, as many people consider them vegetables, or at least vegetarian, hence OK to include them along with vegetables in things like pakoras. And most people don't find them disgusting, so probably don't put a warning if things do contain mushrooms, unlike if it was a fish eyeball or similar.
so best to check when consuming items just marked "vegetable". Just to be on the safe side.
No actual chicken, just cartilaginous material.
Gristle is bastard. Gristle in sausages, gistle in bolognese
I love sausages and it really puts me off for a few minutes. I only buy the 'good' ones and know that they're still probably full of eyelids etc, but you have no control if you get one from a cafe or wherever.
while playing football
felt something funny in my mouth, spat it out - was a spider.
As a child I poured some Coke into a glass and began drinking, felt something funny in my mouth, spat it out.
Some kind of large bug with wings. Fucking horrified.
but this did make me feel properly sick for a minute at the thought. Felt horrible.
on the plus side, Brooke and my mother are terrified of spiders, so telling them about it was quite enjoyable.
One one occasion I laced them up (used to take about 2 mins) only to feel a tickling sensation around my left foot. When it happened a second time I quickly unlaced the boot and emptied out a large cockroach onto the floor.
That was unpleasant
and a wasp which had climbed inside went straight into my mouth and went berserk with the old stinger
when i was young. i will never forget it. now i cant go near the stuff, and the smell of it makes me feel funny.
At first it's like, why is there an acorn in my food? Then all you taste is bloody cardamom on that side of your mouth for an hour.
but they were old. i mean
The sausages were fennel and roast garlic flavour...
Never had fennel before
Started off quite nice, but then I noticed quite a strong aniseedy type flavour to them.
Not sure I like fennel.
Having lunch at school, my vegetarian friend got the pasta. She didn't realise it had sausage in it until she'd eaten half of it.
it wasnt marmite
It was actually cat food.
You just reminded me of a girl at uni who was drunk and went to the toilet then had a chocolate mousse - and then licked it off. I'll leave you to fill in the blanks.
Massive kudos to her for telling us all the next day though.
i assume they involve shit, but i can't work it all out
Very funny but quite saddening too.
I thought that only happened in cartoons.
Only to discover a right load of snobby middle class bollocks
Turns out it was a disposable earplug. I hope she hadn't been wearing it!
*I was really drunk and didn't especially care.
dead fly in my salad in a restaurant once. The waiter didn't handle it well either. 'Guess you got some extra protein!' Oh, fuck off.
*Are quotes still broken on here, btw?
that wasn't good
but it was actually just a teaspoon of coke and lots of empty sunflower seed shells
Before I saw the girl that works at fuel that I'm in love with, and she was walking past me down the road today and I just had a pack of turkey dinosaurs in my hand, without a carrier bag cause I was being good on the environment and then she saw and now thinks that I'm a massive wanker
Was sat at the kitchen table (still covered in the previous evening's drinks), picked up what I thought was my glass of squash and took a mouthful - turned out to be someone's leftover wine from the night before. I don't like wine at the best of times.