Boards
I'd love to make this video
Postman Pat intro (original i.e. the one that everyone knows the theme tune to, not the new shit one)
Just Postman Pat normal intro sequence, driving about the village and stuff
Postman Pat. Postman Pat.
Postman Pat and his black and white cat.
Early in the morning, just as day is dawning,
he picks up all the post bags in his van.
Postman Pat. Postman Pat.
Postman Pat and his black and white cat.
All the birds are singing,
and the day is just beginning.
Pat feels he's a really happy man.
Everybody knows his bright red van,
all his friends will smile as he waves to greet them,
Maybe... you can never be sure,
there'll be knock.
Ring.
LETTUCE THROUGH YOUR DOOR and it cuts to someone trying to force a lettuce through someone's letterbox and in a thick scouse accent 'ORDERED TOO MANY AND THEY'RE NOT GONNA FUCKIN' EAT THEMSELVES ARE THEY!'