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that's what i am doing
you do fuck all to interfere in their relationship - that's up to them
you do whatever it takes to make you feel you have a good relationship with your friend 'cos that's the only bit that's your business
so they are both my friends?
that whatever he does in his relationships is his own private business - between him and whoever he's with - but knowing he's unfaithful to his girlfriend makes it difficult or awkward for you to accept her as a friend or as them as a couple ... if that's how you feel
but really, I think your needs from their relationship are way below their needs for their relationship
it's a little bit more complex but like i say i don't really want to get into EVERYTHING - but yeah
but i don't keep friends who i would actively and openly describe as "a bit of a dick"
The two aren't mutually exclusive.
i steal freddos occasionally but that's it
every group of friends has at least one person who is a bit of a dick
if yours doesn't ... then it's you
but idk, i don't really deal in friendship groups. bit weird. like sometimes i'll go somewhere with a group of people and we're all friends with each other but that's different
Admittedly they're not people I'd rely on for emotional support (I've got other friends for that) but they're people who are great for an entertaining night out with unexpected twists and turns. Surely no-one just wants to hang out with a group of homogenous people who share all your beliefs, values and ethics all the time?
people are free to believe what they want
if part of what he believes is that it's ok to just continually cheat on girlfriends/treat people like shit
Nothing wrong with that of course.
i might have, i can't remember exactly. but what i mean is that i'm happy to be friends with people that believe some things different from me, i've even got friends who like reggae (cunts) but yeah, there'll be some things that'll mark a person as someone i don't want to spend time with
Maybe tell him he's being a dick if you know him really well and can have that conversation with him.
I'm only friends with assexual hand-wringers.
absolutely none of my business and not sure why I think it would be
theyre probably a sociopath
if they're a good friend, they oughtn't be exempt from criticism. hell, if my friends are being unpleasant i'll tell them so, why is this any different?
look: you cheat on someone, that's a BAD thing. you're fucking around with people's emotions, you're betraying someone who is most likely hell of committed to you (i don't know this to be the case in this instance BUT). that's not so much how to use a penis, it's how to treat other human beings with dignity and respect
they're fucking someone else and intentionally hurting another human being who is committed to them and trusts them.
but i think it's a pretty simple situation
No relationship is as simple as a guy and girl are happily going out with each other and thats it. People have problems and different boundaries etc. If its really bothering you, talk to your friend and say you will have to keep your distance if it carries on as it makes you feel uncomfortable.
are entirely theoretical.
...and doesn't give a fuck either way. Not sure what sticking your beak in in such fashion would achieve.
perhaps some kind of wake-up call. i'd feel uncomfortable not letting my friends know if they're doing something i personally strongly dislike - and i'd expect them to do the same if i were
In spite of never having come close to cheating on a girlfriend, I'm not sure I personally have a strong enough moral standpoint from which to judge people's behaviour from... but if you feel you do - fair enough.
They give him an ultimatum that either he tells her or you will.
texting him now
that took the photo of the guy dying under a train
that you're not entirely convinced doing nothing is the right thing. otherwise you wouldn't have made the thread.
ha - it's actually mildly more complex than the OP suggest but I don't really want to get into specifics.
and yeah i'm not entirely convinced doing nothing is the RIGHT thing. I think it's the only sensible option, and the best thing to do in the situation - but i don't think it's necessary RIGHT to stand by and watch someone getting fucked over.
I'm uncomfortable with it i guess.
cheating happens once in a while and while it's fucking awful i could sympathise with someone who did it if they were proper gutted about it and felt awful. i cheated on my first girlfriend and i didn't eat or sleep for 3 days. i felt like such a cunt. if however, someone in my close circle was at it all the time and didn't feel bad about it, then yeah, i'd have a problem being friends with that person.
Make them aware that it makes you uncomfortable and you don't approve and leave it up to them to make the right decision.
Call him a twat and make it clear you have no respect for him for doing that. Make jokes and comments about it.
that's all you can do really. I wouldn't tell her.
or were bitching about someone ?
In one of my old houses, my mate's GF lived with us, but he cheated on her near constantly. She would go home a lot as she was a masters student, and the second she was gone, he'd be knobbing some lass up the arse. Thing was, I could only afford the rent as they were both paying, so if they split up, I was fucked. BUT I also hated her, so while I felt bad for her, it also gave me a sick laugh every time she annoyed me by turning off televised sport to watch ANTM or sent her food back in the resaturant EVERY SINGLE TIME on some principle (*you get better food if you send it back, forces the chef to up his game*)
Anyway, we all ended up moving out, and they split up when it came time to get their own place. A year later she married a 52 year old party planner.
So yeah, steer well clear, plead innocence when asked
but I owed him loads of money and was really struggling to pay him back at the time.
That would be putting you in a very awkward situation, making your living arrangements virtually untenable, and you’d be perfectly entitled to tell your mate to sort out his situation PDQ. (I still wouldn’t tell the girl though. That’s just absolute madness.)
So wherever we went, on principle she would take one bite, call the waiter and send it back cos it was too cold/sauce wasn't think enough/was underdone.
It was mortifying. We all started going to great lengths to avoid eating with her
I avoid sending anything back unless I really feel I have to, precisely because I don't want to disturb the flow of the meal.
I don't want to get stabbed.
(end of thread)
but I wouldn't do anything. I would offer your friend support if they wanted to talk about it (unless they were like yeaaah i fuck this bird and have another bird lol) as sometimes its not just a case of going elsewhere for a shag, its usually a deeper problem they're having in their life or their relationship so as a friend, I wouldn't let what they do in their alone time come between us.
They're still your friend at the end of the day and might be acting out as they're going through something so I'd just stay out, not add any pressure and definitely not meddle.
you'll be a better person if you do something though. As long as its measured and with genuine intentions.
Don't listen to the people being nihilistic on here. We're largely defined by our relationships with other people. Trying to do the right thing with them is a great way to live and you'll feel good about yourself.
so aslong as you're okay with that, go ahead, butt in.
You'd feel pretty stupid if she turned round and said 'yeah, I know....we have an open relationship'.
you'd just be like, oh right, fair enough. and you wouldn't have to worry anymore about whether you should do something. also then you can boff the girl
which would probably mean going behind his friends back and doing something nasty instead of just having a word with his mate like a normal person. The guy wouldn't trust chris with anything in future.
It would (obviously) get back to him and he'd be hurt that you betrayed him and told his girlfriend without consulting him.
Its not a soap opera. Its very humiliating and upsetting and you have to be very tactful if you are going to tell someone information that they will not want to hear. Its not your place to end someones relationship, its up to the people in the relationship and thats it.
How would you feel if you had a friend that was seeing/shagging someone who was married/in a relationship? Would that make you feel uncomfortable too?
he's just gonna go 'yeah yeah whatever' then go shag some girl and go home to his girlfriend.
guy is a tool, can't be friends with that
Surely the act of cheating on your loved one would be enough to make you feel guilty.
SOmetimes you need a bit of a kick up the arse to realise what you stand to lose.
"Erm, what would you do if I told you that I found out your girlfriend is cheating on you....?" and take it from there
just talk to him or something, idk. I dont know the context or anything.
He'll thank you in the long run.
take the gold (you'll need to barter with Brother Strange on level 2 with this) and hold the spyglass up to the eyeshield
going to stick to the currant strategy or not doing anything and tutting behind said friend's back.
Feels distinctly pot/ kettle.
putting all his eggs in one basket. Dunno what's going on so steer far, far awayyyy