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Silkyskillz11 kicks off the big spending, securing England's #1 with a bid of £28m.

Far too excited for this.

i don't find that shameful at all, i'm having quite a good time.

The veteran GK takes on one last challenge at Legia Lurchy2. One other bid failed at £300k. Despite his age he's definitely worth £700k more at £1m.

The Emperor of Goalkeeping Julio Cesar signs for LLB Sports in a knockdown £3m deal, again beating a couple of pocket money bids from other managers.

Deadonthestairs secures the services of super shot stopper Pepe Reina for a whopping £22m, beating off two flyweight offers. "He might not be the best in the world, but he's preferable to Szczesny", said a delighted dyslexic Dynamos fan.

£25m has secured Gianluigi the Goalkeeping Greasball, and the man who has secured him is NikMak for the Paddywhackers. Once again, no other significant bids were lodged despite Buffon's worldwide reputation.

The saviour of centre backs signs for ... Deadonthestairs Dynamos! £33m was more than enough to secure his services. £32m more to be precise. Still, this guy is gooood.

I honestly don't think i bid over £500k for any of these lads so far.

Silkyskillz11 shows his transferskillz11 by securing the services of the veteran (but by no means past it) centre back Lucio. Four other bids came in, the nearest being £6m, but in the end a £20m bid won the auction.

Derisory bid wins through as Legia Lurchy2 picks up the talented youngster. Two other bids were tabled even lower than the £1m winning bid!

Two significant bids were tabled for the big Serb. Lurchy2's £17.8m sounds about right, but Middlemansbrough were always going to win with a staggering £35m.

Middlemansbrough pulled out another mammoth bid for the classy Spaniard with £40m. But when the likes of Kitchmo are willing to offer £75m, there's no contest. Pique signs for KFC.

Forza and NikMak went head to head on this one, lodging two bids very close to each other. But then LLB and Lurchy2 more than doubled these bids.

In the end ... Lurchy2 wins with a bid of £13.5m beating off bids of £12.3m, £5.9m and £3m for the Croatian Crossing King.

and I thought I'd put in some ridiculous bids.

LLB trumps Forza £17.1m to £7m.

I'll check in every once in a while.

Some of these bids are outrageous. 35mil for Branislav...my word.

Forzaborza finally lands a player in speedy full back Pablo Armero, beating off three small bids with his own bid of £7m.

Forzaborza breaks open the piggybank again to bid £30.2 for the Brazilian Bomber Dani Alves. But he's trumped by a £42.5m offer from Middlemansbrough. The north-east has never seen the like of it before. Well, at least not since Tony McMahon left.

he's just popped for another poo.

Possibly the most popular player in the auction, Philip Lahm received bids from nearly every manager, all of which serious money.

In the end £22.5m (lurchy2) wasn't enough. Nor was £26m (deadonthestairs). £30m (middleman), £30.2m (forzaborza) and £30.5m (svenrokk) came and went. £40.5m (OBT) would surely have normally got the guy. But NikMak bid £50m! And even that wasn't enough to beat the spending power of The Colonel. KFC Kitchmo win out at £75m. £150m on two players, but quality players they are!

it happens.

but if it runs over 'til tomorrow we'll have to get Ant to shit in his locker.

No more transfers until then. If you like I can just pick this up again tomorrow? Or I could do the defensive midfielders about 6:00ish?

I will have 70m left to play with in the coming days. expecting more hyper-inflated valuations as everyone throws their remaining cash around.

Happy with Alves, could certainly do with a top class CB though.

not going to win anything here. Not even dear old Kvist.

Five managers went for Alex Song in fact. Two strong bids were lodged of £15m and £18.2m, and the higher of the two was from Lord Lucius Banter.

If ever there was a player screaming out "derisory bid wins" it was Scott Parker, right? Wrong. Two small change bids were made, but Legia Lurchy2 get our Brave Scotty with a bid of £11.8m.

Four bids for the Danish Destroyer, with two serious offers. OBT missed out on his fellow countryman bidding a paltry £1.1m, and Svenrokk came close with a bid of £8m, but Lurchy2 obviously likes his anchor men (ooh hello sailor!) and lands Kvist for £12.5m.

The difference between the two bids for Xavi was £34.6m. One of those bids was a measly £1m. But I'm sure Forzaborza won't mind that he could have picked up the Spanish star for a lot less. He's got his man.

Possibly the transfer drama of the round so far focuses on German all rounder Bastian Schweinsteiger. Four bids were lodged. One was a bit cheeky at £11.7. The other three were so unbelievably close that it beggars belief.

LLB bid £29.8m
Forzaborza bid £30.2m
OBT bid £30.1m

YCMIU.

Nobody seems to want little Portuguese maestro Joao Moutinho. Two pint sized bids were made for the Ronnie Corbett lookalike, Lurchy2 being the higher at £1m. A real bargain!

The young double-barrelled one Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain survived the indignity of the regular derisory bid crew to be plucked from the ether by LLB Sports, for £8m.

Flying the flag for Japan is Shinji Kawaga, and he will be flying that flag at Legia Lurchy2 who lodged the only substantial bid for the player at £17.2m.

Well, not much. Three laughably low bids thought they would get away with swiping the nippy England winger for peanuts, but again, LLB springs in with a serious but not ridiculous bid of £8m.

Four bids for the young English German. Two were cheeky low ones, Svenrokk put in a decent tactical bid of £4.5m which might have come off on another day, but Lurchy2 picks up yet another player with a bid of £11.2m.

MAXIMUM DRAMA over here at DiS League towers in Virginia. We have a TIE! Both Lurchy2 and NikMak bid a cheeky £1m for the tricky Spanish protege, so if the managers can't work out some kind of deal between themselves, it goes to a coin toss!

Well, a nice crisis. Unbelievably the wheeler-dealer manager has picked up another two attacking bargains, one of which is massive news.

Firstly pacy forward Gabriel Agbonlahor joins the Legia legion for £1m. More significantly though, he has secured the services of the most popular player from the original player lottery, Gonzalo Higuain ... also for £1m. Incredible Jeff!

Unbelievably only two managers made serious bids for the Spanish superman. And again it was a flippin' close one. And again forzaborza edges it. £35.6m to deadonthestairs' £34m. Some incredible business from the Mancunian master.

Incredible scenes at DiS League towers as the derisory bid kings went head to head over arguably the best player in the world. Forzaborza outbids Lurchy2 by £1.2m to £1m. Well, that was the case until NikMak came in at the last minute with a case of crisp £50s to the total of £90m. Paddywhackers rejoice!

As always they are loving the Brazilians on Teeside as Middlemansbrough swaggers in with a bid of £18m for the unproven but highly rated forward, seeing off two bids from Team Derisory.

It seems only the poor were interested in the unpredictable South American as we had a genuine three way team derisory shootout for the little Brazilian. OBT and Forza miss out to Lurchy2 who secures yet another bargain purchase for an entirely silly £1m.

Well, a nice crisis. Unbelievably the wheeler-dealer manager has picked up another two attacking bargains, one of which is massive news.

Firstly pacy forward Gabriel Agbonlahor joins the Legia legion for £1m. More significantly though, he has secured the services of the most popular player from the original player lottery, Gonzalo Higuain ... also for £1m. Incredible Jeff!

(from above, sorry, threadsmash fucked it up)

Actually powerful forward Edinson Cavani is pretty good in the air and will get to show off his aerial skills at ... Sporting Svenrokk. Surprisingly only one proper bid was made for the slick forward, £30.5m.

Seven bids in total for the Brazilian wonderkid, five of which were serious money. £28.1m, £35m, £53.5m. You had to expect OBT would have got him with a bid of £60.1m, and ... he didn't! Silkyskillz11 wipes the floor with a DiS league record bid of £92m securing three out of three of his targets.

You guys just don't learn, do you? I'm not even going to try and make this funny or sensational.

Forzaborza has edged out a bid of £1m by Lurchy2 to sign Lionel Messi for £1.2m.

You fucking idiots. Well done Forza, that's great business!

I'll update the squads tomorrow. Cheers everyone.

that I'm surprised no one else tried. And well played to him. The jammy dickhead.

missed out on Lahm.

Well played Forza...Xavi, Iniesta and Lionel....I think im going to be sick. You mugs! Wink

let me know!

Had a really busy day at work doing actual work (or as close to actual work is possible testing Football Manager). Have managed to update the transfers page, so you can see who signed for who there, or in this thread.

As regards the returned player sale, I'm really sorry but I can't provide the list of all the players right now.

My computer is still not connected to the internet at my new place and won't be until next week. I'll try and borrow my housemate's laptop and update stuff properly, but if not we'll have to do this on Monday.

Feel free to trade players amongst yourselves until then!

any one want to swap it for some players, like?

Will update everything tomorrow, including the extra player list. We can then get underway, first round of fixtures will take place next week.

All transfers and budgets should be updated correctly. I'm updating the squad pages sporadically.

Database - http://tinyurl.com/d2yk5nd

Here's how the final player sale will work...

- VERY EASY - Managers can bid for as many players as they like. Bids must match the minimum value I have attributed each player. Managers cannot bid more than the total of their remaining budget. Highest bid for each player wins.

Here is the list...

Lindegaard - GK - 84 - £8m
Given - GK - 77 - £2.5m
Woon-Jae - GK - 76 - £2m
Squillaci - DC - 76 - £2m
Carragher - D R/L/C - 78 - £3m
(Gary) Caldwell - D R/C - 79 - £3.5m
Boyce - D R/C - 78 - £3m
Shotton - DR - 77 - £2.5m
Hibbert - DR - 79 - £3.5m
(Armand) Traore - D/M L - 75 - £2m
(Karl) Henry - DM/MC - 75 - £2m
Frimpong - DM/MC - 80 - £4.5m
Cattermole - DM/MC - 79 - £3m
Fletcher - MC - 82 - £5m
Seedorf - MC - 80 - £4m
Riquelme - M/AMC - 81 - £5m
(Ravel) Morrison - AM R/C - 78 - £3m
Lallana - AM L/C - 82 - £6m
Adu - AM R/L/C - 75 - £2m
Routledge - AM R/L - 79 - £3.5m
Jarvis - AM R/L - 82 - £6m
Owen - FC - 80 - £4m
Holt - FC - 81 - £4.75m

Don't know/don't care how the auctions for this are working but I had a fucking dream about this the other day. I was trying to put a low bid in for every player and just see what I ended up with but I hardly had any time and LLB was trying to look at my bit of paper and meths was hurrying me and I ended up not getting any bids in at all.

I have no idea what's going on, but I have heard OBT is attempting some sort of counter auction of all his players, basically, whether deliberately or not (it seems deliberate) trying to undermine the whole setup by making his squad empty.

In light of this there will be no further transfers between managers ratified. Final player auction closes tomorrow at mid-day. Cheers.

If OBT wants to back out we'll find another manager for his squad.

OBT has PM'd me to explain. Still seems a bit odd to me, but it is a misunderstanding rather than anything malicious, which is good. He's still in, but his auction is off. Trades between managers are back on, if anybody still wants to do that.

Deadline for final player sale is still midday tomorrow. Games will start next week.

Cheers!

Not everyone has submitted bids. I realise this is probably because most (all) of the players are wacko jacko but deadline has been extended until about 1:30pm if you wanna get rid of your spare change as I won't be able to announce anything until then.

Never has so much money been frittered away on useless rejects! Well, not since Tony Fernandes took over QPR. Which isn't that long to be fair.

Named "Caldwell" due to the fact his main, possibly only strength is shouting loudly, Gary Caldwell is the Paul Chuckle to his brother Stephen's Barry. A Butthead to his Beavis. The better brother. Still ... would YOU pay £20.2m for Paul Chuckle? Middleman wouldn't. He'd pay £6.9m. But Deadonthestairs ... he very much would.

Adam Lallana has achieved what Matt Le Tissier mastered in the 1990s - looking really good by virtue of playing for Southampton. The thing is, Le Tissier was actually good. Again Middleman puts in a solid bid of £11.6m, but again Deadonthestairs gets out his mum's credit card to pay a mind boggling £21.5m for the young attacking midfielder.

Oooh so close! Middleman almost wins the services of Sir Alex's secret child with a bid of £11.8m, but NikMak saves his bacon by bidding £12m to secure the really ill midfielder.

OBT finally sees success of sorts (pun intended) in an auction, by securing the services of Barbados legend Emmerson Boyce for £3.6m.

Colin Wanker's famous quote obviously passed OBT by, as he secures his second backup full back for a piddly £3.4m.

No! A whole £16 million secures the services of sulky but skilful trequarista Juan Roman Riquelme. This kid is a talent when out on the pitch. It's getting him out of bed that will be the problem for Deadonthestairs.

Zshe copsch were left baffled today as a pensioner, a certain Clarence Seedorf, disappeared from his sheltered accomodation in the Netherlands. No trace was left of the old man, but in his place was left a cheque for £11.3m signed by Deadonthestairs. Later, a different cheque for £10.9m from Middleman arrived, but it is thought this was returned as they already had more money than they knew what to do with. Apparently the unexpected windfall will be spent on re-painting the splattered toilet walls.

Even in his Liverpool glory days when he was banging in goals for fun, Michael Owen only commanded a transfer fee of £8m from Real Madrid. Now, after bringing the NHS to the edge of financial ruin, and having had a maximum speed limit of 6mph wired into him, Michael Owen signs for free-spending Deadonthestairs Dynamos for a borderline illegal transfer fee of £20.2m.

Two sizeable bids were made for the highest rated player in the sale. Still, a bid of £17.7m is way over the Danish stopper's value, so Middlemansbrough must have thought he'd got his man. However, the big Dane joins his countryman OBT instead after a staggering bid of £50m.

All other players will be melted down and made into Pritt Stick.

I'll try my best to update the squads and stuff as soon as I can, but this might have to wait until early next week.

First games should take place on Thursday next week, though I'm away this weekend and not back at work until Tuesday so they may have to be delayed slightly. We'll see!

Almost there...

Finally have internet at home now so tomorrow I will update the squads and put up the fixtures.

If everybody can get their teams in to me by Sunday we can start games then. If not, we'll do them next week.

Sorry this has taken so long!

I've had some unexpected stuff to deal with recently and I've also been ill for the last few days. I'm back at work now but feeling shit. Gonna be incredibly busy the next few days too preparing for a show I'm putting on this coming Saturday. I'll endeavour to get the squad lists finalised and the fixtures up tonight. Then I can hopefully do the first fixtures next Monday, then another round before a break for xmas / new year.

Just checking I've not missed another thread on this or anything...