Old standards and new inventions.
arseholed: it’s good, it’s a classic, you know where you stand with it. It displays the versatility of ‘arsehole’ as well. It might come from being so drunk that you act like an arsehole, or being so drunk that you feel you’ve been shat out/shat upon (or that you’ve taken it up the arsehole, or are so drunk you could take it up the arsehole). Great stuff.
cunted: the best for describing maximum drunkenness. It makes me think of being so arseholed that you feel like you’ve been smacked about, somewhat like twatted, but instead you’ve been brutally smacked about, thus cunted; not so much so drunk you become a cunt. When someone says they were cunted, you know they were beyond the pale, beyond help, beyond good and evil.
Jazz Aged: I made this up when I was watching Boardwalk Empire. It has a couple of meanings: 1} drunk in a highly debaucherous way (as that’s how it’s always portrayed in films about the Jazz Age); 2} drunk when you’re not supposed to be drunk, or somewhere you’re not supposed to be drunk, such as at work or a really formal party you accidentally get cunted at.
Here we go.