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to kick me repeatedly in the shins.
Had to stop reading this.
even if i don't agree with all of it?
but i won't believe you.
but I do think there's an implicit stigma attached to it.
People that spend the majority of their time singe vs. people that spend the majority of their time in relationships.
so you don't know anyone who seems utterly desperte to not be single? or who pays for a dating site? or who waits for a new relationship to appear on the horizon before vacating the old one? or someone who equates "being single" with "dating loads but never making a commitment"? because they're all pretty much symbols of it.
i should have mentioned i didn't read the whole thing. but what he was going on about at the start - disdain or implicit judgement/pressure from people who are in relationships? nah.
but i think their reasons are probably a bit more basic
If you keep it going for long enough, people just stop asking. I win. Probably.
I think you've picked the wrong thread.
(Oversensitive Guy + Tactless Friends + Lack of Anything to really worry about = molehill) + fast approaching journalist deadline = mountain
Not against people who are single in between relationships, but there is for people who are always single.
Do you think it's different for girls?
Though I think you've referred to an ex or two on the past - what people find really weird is when they come across an adult who's never been anything other than single.
and "forever alone".
It won't let me.
""And I haven't minded. Or rather, I realise, I haven't minded enough. But now I kind of do. Take dinner parties. There comes a moment, and that question: 'Why don't you have a partner?'""
Stop going to dinner parties with cunts then...
I was single for a few years around the time all my close friends started to get 'serious' with their partners (moving in together etc), and I can't say I was treated any differently. Of course they would, seperately, have the odd double dates and that kind of stuff, but I was never excluded or left out of social events, even ones where it was all couples and me stuck on the end of the end of the table by myself.
It's just a confidence thing I reckon. If you come across confident in social situations people don't give a shit if your single or not really. If you come across as a needy forever alone virgin then yeah, people *might* treat you slightly differently because of your 'aura', but then people might treat you differently becaue you're wearing a tracksuit, or a football shirt, or a cravat, or because your a vegetarian or because you listen to Oasis or whatever (pun intended).
People use all sorts of criteria to 'judge' others - some of it justified, some not. Being single or in a relationship might, for some people, be one of those criteria but not for all people. It varies. But if you're confident about your situation (even if internally you might not be happy about it) then most people won't bat an eyelid.
I never said you could jsut 'get confident' if you're not, but I think it's more of a confidence thing than a being single thing that might make people be mean to you (as you appear weak, and mean people prey on the weak). Of course, confidence issues might partly be the reason you're single, but this thread is about discussing why some people are mean to single people, not so much what the solutions to that are.
because blah blah blah society says everyone should settle down by 30 and marry blah.
I don't think coupled up people do it to be mean to single people but they do it because they know or think that person would like a relationship and are usually just asking if they've found anyone nice recently. I know more single people than I do coupled people and I only ever speak to them about their love life if they seem down about it and usually want to talk to someone.