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My flatmate's been banging on the front door for the last like half an hour cos i guess he didn't take his key

still_here [Edit] [Delete] 116 replies 17:47, 28 May '12

i thought it was just building works cos a house on our street has scaffolding and stuff. But it isn't.

It's too late just to wander down and open the door for him isn't it? Yeah it is.

He keeps on banging really loudly. You'd think he'd get bored.

I feel terrible though but my hands are tied.

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  • I mean, i've got my window open and it sounds exactly like it does when someone's hammering something

    with a hammer

    still_here | 28 May '12, 17:48 | X
  • How are you typing if yr hands are tied?

    andyvine | 28 May '12, 17:48 | X
    this'd this
    • You could - and i'm saying *could* here because I have no background info

      be a bit of a wanker.

      cocodaLOL | 28 May '12, 17:50 | X
      TheBeautifulOnes_, OvertakenByTractors, and Cementimental this'd this
      • I think he's given up now

        i really hope he has

        still_here @cocodaLOL | 28 May '12, 17:51 | X
    • wander down and open the door and say

      *oh, I thought that noise was just building works cos a house on our street has scaffolding and stuff*

      j0hn | 28 May '12, 17:50 | X
      TheoGB, Icarus-Smicarus, OvertakenByTractors, and Cementimental this'd this
      • He sounds really angry though

        if he didn't sound so angry it would be fine.

        I don't like confrontation. Especially when i'm the one being an idiot.

        still_here @j0hn | 28 May '12, 17:51 | X
        cocodaLOL this'd this
    • call the police

      shrewbie | 28 May '12, 17:53 | X
      cocodaLOL this'd this
    • Surely he'd have given up by now

      If he didnt know you weren't in there already?

      E_H_Gombreak | 28 May '12, 17:53 | X
      cocodaLOL this'd this
      • Yeah

        but he can't KNOW i'm in here. I'm just gonna wait until someone else lets him in, then they both leave the house again before i get out my room and be like HIYA HOWS YOUR DAY BEEN.

        still_here @E_H_Gombreak | 28 May '12, 17:56 | X
    • jump out the window

      oh hi i was just out doing stuff outside the house, did you forget your key?

      CrispinAlexander | 28 May '12, 17:54 | X
      • fuck you dis

        THERE WAS MORE TO THAT

        CrispinAlexander @CrispinAlexander | 28 May '12, 17:54 | X
    • Jesus titty fucking Christ what is wrong with you?

      Say you had your headphones on or something. Don't be a twat. I'm now determined to find out who your flatmate is so I can tell him you were inside the whole time being a twat.

      eltham | 28 May '12, 17:56 | X
      TheoGB and StormJH this'd this
      • mate, he sounded really angry

        any anger management manual would tell you you should give an angry person lots of space.

        still_here @eltham | 28 May '12, 17:58 | X
        • i did have my headphones in anyway

          i don't think that's good enough though.

          still_here @still_here | 28 May '12, 17:59 | X
          • still_here

            still_trolling

            TheoGB @still_here | 28 May '12, 18:00 | X
    • is it definitely your flatmate?

      half an hour is a bit nuts. he must know you're there

      no-class | 28 May '12, 18:00 | X
      • Yeah i heard him on the phone that's when i first found out it was him not builders

        i feel really bad.

        still_here @no-class | 28 May '12, 18:01 | X
    • oh this happened to me before

      and i assumed someone else would answer it and by the time i realised i was the only one in it was too late. then they saw through my window that i was in and i pretended i'd been wearing my earphones but it was blatant

      shrewbie | 28 May '12, 18:00 | X
      • say you've been having a nap

        shrewbie @shrewbie | 28 May '12, 18:01 | X
        • i dont think that would work

          it might do but i dunno.

          I really want to help. I just don't think I can.

          still_here @shrewbie | 28 May '12, 18:03 | X
          • set off the fire alarm

            shrewbie @still_here | 28 May '12, 18:06 | X
            andyvine this'd this
        • *fap

          TheBeautifulOnes_ @shrewbie | 28 May '12, 18:08 | X
    • He probably sounds angry

      Because he can hear you typing through your open window.

      in_limbo | 28 May '12, 18:03 | X
      • nah, top floor

        plus i type like a mouse

        still_here @in_limbo | 28 May '12, 18:05 | X
    • show him this thread

      lemonbrickcombo | 28 May '12, 18:05 | X
    • This reminds me of the time this autistic kid knocked on my door

      but I was scared of him so I pretended I wasn't home, but after half an hour, he was still waiting outside, so I had to open the door like I was going out anyway and pretend that I'd been asleep and hadn't heard him knocking.

      Zapsta | 28 May '12, 18:06 | X
      • yes, sorry about that

        TheBeautifulOnes_ @Zapsta | 28 May '12, 18:08 | X
      • fucksake just wrote quite a long thing in reply to this

        dunno what happened.

        Glad you finally got to air this story on dis though.

        still_here @Zapsta | 28 May '12, 18:11 | X
        • :D

          Zapsta @still_here | 28 May '12, 18:14 | X
    • Is he still there?

      -dan- | 28 May '12, 18:08 | X
      • ^not a pun btw

        -dan- @-dan- | 28 May '12, 18:09 | X
        • Although actually, it's a pretty good one

          Let's say it was intentional.

          -dan- @-dan- | 28 May '12, 18:09 | X
          TheBeautifulOnes_ this'd this
    • people have a lot of different ideas about things

      ohgood | 28 May '12, 18:08 | X
    • so...you're either waiting for him to call a locksmith or for another housemate to come home?

      you know, if another housemate comes home right now he's going to know you were there

      honestly i was just pretend to be sleepy and say you were asleep, he'll almost definitely get angry but fuck him, it's not your fault he forgot his key.

      CrispinAlexander | 28 May '12, 18:08 | X
      • nah we've got locks on our doors

        if i stay right here and don't move, there's no way he'll ever know i'm here.

        But yeah my contingency plan is that i was sleeping/had headphones on. Which is sort of the truth really.

        still_here @CrispinAlexander | 28 May '12, 18:12 | X
        • ffs, just go down right now and say you've been watching a film with your headphones on

          Act surprised if/when he mentions how long he's been knocking. To be fair, knocking on a door for an hour is pretty mental anyway so he'll probably just say he's been knocking "for ages" and then bugger off to his room embarrassed.

          -dan- @still_here | 28 May '12, 18:20 | X
          • being locked out is really annoying though

            and if you then find out someone was there all along, it's extra irritating. especially if you're an angry basketcase like this guy seems to be.

            but still you need to go down there and let him in, just let him be pissed off it doesn't matter

            CrispinAlexander @-dan- | 28 May '12, 18:21 | X
    • Tell him you've been stuck on the loo with diarrhea.

      Two_dads_kissing | 28 May '12, 18:10 | X
      • Beautiful.

        And have a mugful of peanut butter handy if he dares question you.

        eltham @Two_dads_kissing | 28 May '12, 18:19 | X
    • Link him to this thread

      Vernon_Kernel | 28 May '12, 18:12 | X
      • is there an echo in here?

        lemonbrickcombo @Vernon_Kernel | 28 May '12, 18:17 | X
        • An echo...

          in here..?

          -dan- @lemonbrickcombo | 28 May '12, 18:20 | X
        • ctrl+f link = 0 results

          Can you blame a guy?

          Vernon_Kernel @lemonbrickcombo | 28 May '12, 18:26 | X
    • Someone's back!

      they had a key. I don't think it was him.

      Thank fuck can't believe i got away with it.

      still_here | 28 May '12, 18:35 | X
      • shit it was him

        that's okay though he got someone else's key which still gave me a window in which i COULD'VE got back from the library.

        Result.

        still_here @still_here | 28 May '12, 18:37 | X
        • if he finds out tho

          he's gonna strip and eat your god damn face

          CrispinAlexander @still_here | 28 May '12, 18:39 | X
          • :D

            nah i reckon in an hour he'll be calm again. I would be, but then i am very forgiving.

            still_here @CrispinAlexander | 28 May '12, 18:41 | X
            • you think he will mellow after an extra hour of waiting?

              exhausted maybe, but wait till he recovers his energy

              creakyknees @still_here | 28 May '12, 19:04 | X
    • :D

      no-class @james_ | 28 May '12, 19:21 | X
    • also :(

      no-class @james_ | 28 May '12, 19:22 | X
    • I'm actually genuinely worried by the mental health of people on this forum

      Some of you go beyond sociopathic and straight into pyschopathic.

      lemonbrickcombo | 28 May '12, 18:50 | X
      Darcy, Body_In_The_Thames, Icarus-Smicarus, sexy_girl, MurkyB, TheBeautifulOnes_, andyvine, Cementimental, Luis_Carruthers, and LOLpop this'd this
      • sorry

        you're not very good at diagnosing mental health problems of people on the internet.

        I'm pretty good. Can tell the psychopaths on these boards a mile off.

        still_here @lemonbrickcombo | 28 May '12, 20:13 | X
    • I don't want to worry you

      but if I lived there I probably wouldn't knock for 30 minutes.

      If, however, I'd slain your housemate and was wearing his face like a mask then I would probably wait it out as it would seem like a 'creepy psycho' thing to do and it would probably appeal to my sense of twisted vanity.

      Si_Badvibes | 28 May '12, 18:52 | X
      still_here this'd this
    • Having once, aged 14, had to stand outside my house desperately knocking on the door and the window

      Whilst my dad listened to Dark Side of the Moon on vinyl at full blast (was making the front door shake), I dislike you. Sorry

      LordLuciusBanter | 28 May '12, 18:53 | X
      • Sorry.

        I've had something similar a few times though.

        Quite a few times my step mum would lock the back door and leave the key in the lock by accident, so i'd have to wait hours to get in. That was annoying.

        One time one of us (kids) accidentally locked her out when we left for school in the morning and she went to walk the dog although i can't remember how and i can't remember how she got in but when we got back she kept us locked out for about an hour to teach us a lesson. That was surreal.

        still_here @LordLuciusBanter | 28 May '12, 19:05 | X
        • I mean we could see her and her mum walk past the windows of the house every now and then

          and we'd be like `what the fuck?` But yeah. Well weird.

          still_here @still_here | 28 May '12, 19:07 | X
    • fucking hell

      some people

      Jordan_229_2 | 28 May '12, 19:12 | X
    • Just to reiterate,

      you are a spineless twat.

      Can't believe you'd let someone wait outside for so long, just because it might make you feel a little bit uncomfortable. Troubling.

      malick | 28 May '12, 19:12 | X
      Silkyskillz11 and TheBeautifulOnes_ this'd this
      • chill out

        i was only aware of it for like 5 before he left.

        still_here @malick | 28 May '12, 19:16 | X
      • *Trolling.

        Cementimental @malick | 29 May '12, 15:32 | X
    • Just say you had your headphones on. He will be relieved you let him in.

      I never usually answer the door because its usually the same traveler looking for sponsorship for some made up event. Usually if someone is calling over I know in advance.

      skellywager | 28 May '12, 19:20 | X
    • you're a bad person

      i don't even mean morally bad, just lacking in the abilities you would expect a person to have.

      codpieceface | 28 May '12, 19:24 | X
      Icarus-Smicarus and badmanreturns this'd this
      • yeah i can get on board with that

        still_here @codpieceface | 28 May '12, 19:27 | X
    • this thread is actually hilarious.

      especially the really angry posts.

      no-class | 28 May '12, 19:26 | X
      • Really?

        It just makes me thank that this guy is a complete asshat.

        lemonbrickcombo @no-class | 28 May '12, 19:46 | X
        • it's just one of those curb your enthusiasm

          awkward social scenarios taken to a ridiculous extreme isn't it? the other guy sounds like a bigger asshat..generally if i'm dumb enough to forget my key i'll knock on the door 4/5 times max and if it's not happening it's not happening.

          then again, you never know it could have been an emergency - that just occurred to me there..

          no-class @lemonbrickcombo | 28 May '12, 19:54 | X
          • it wasn't an emergency

            he's on his computer now.

            It was never gonna be an emergency, if there was a chance it could've been i would've felt COMPELLED.

            still_here @no-class | 28 May '12, 20:03 | X
            • hope he was reading this thread

              Cementimental @still_here | 29 May '12, 17:06 | X
              no-class this'd this
    • I really hope he breaks the door in

      and you have to pay for it.

      Icarus-Smicarus | 28 May '12, 19:26 | X
      • do you mean like

        it sort of sounds like you mean you hope he rapes him

        CrispinAlexander @Icarus-Smicarus | 28 May '12, 19:54 | X
        • well I certainly don't hope that happens, but if it does

          que sera sera.

          Icarus-Smicarus @CrispinAlexander | 28 May '12, 20:09 | X
    • Shouldn't have forgot his key

      should he?

      Songs_about_ducking | 28 May '12, 19:57 | X
      still_here this'd this
    • This sort of shit always happens to me.

      Once I was in my room watching a film and didnt hear the door for ages. Finally went to open it in my pyjamas and it was my friends Nan who had made him a lasagne and driven down from London and it had all gone weird because it was out of the fridge for so long.

      I felt really fucking bad. Pretty sure she's dead now too.

      coolerthantv | 28 May '12, 19:58 | X
      • :((((((((((

        that's the saddest thing.

        I'm glad it wasn't anyone's nan.

        still_here @coolerthantv | 28 May '12, 20:01 | X
        • Apostrophe's are the bane of my lif'e

          coolerthantv @still_here | 28 May '12, 20:07 | X
          • oh it looked like i was being a grammar nazi there doesn't it

            i wasn't sorry.

            I meant i'm glad my flatmate wasn't anyone's nan. In an abstract sense. I know it's physically impossible for him to be a nan.

            still_here @coolerthantv | 28 May '12, 20:10 | X
            • I get mad grammar paranoia.

              Even checked that original post for apostrophe mistakes and didn't find any. That's my career as a sub editor over before it's even begun.

              Strangely enough after posting that I went to the shop to get some Grated Italian Parmigiano Reggiano and forgot my keys and nobody let me in for 5 minutes. IRONY RIGHT THERE GUYS.

              coolerthantv @still_here | 28 May '12, 20:24 | X
              • derren brown is watching and laughing.

                sexy_girl @coolerthantv | 28 May '12, 20:39 | X
                coolerthantv this'd this
            • Oh, and I believe that 'didn't it' is the phrase you were looking for.

              coolerthantv @still_here | 28 May '12, 20:27 | X
              • haha

                oh, you

                still_here @coolerthantv | 28 May '12, 20:37 | X
      • this exact thing

        that is the summary of sadness i think, someone going out of their way to do a sweet thing and it's not noticed. Like the oscar wilde nightingale and the rose

        sexy_girl @coolerthantv | 28 May '12, 20:14 | X
        • I definitely had to google this literary reference,

          and ended up reading the whole story. Tragic stuff, although I did enjoy the part played by the cynical lizard.

          coolerthantv @sexy_girl | 28 May '12, 21:09 | X
          • What's the etiquette when say

            you hear your flatmate knock on the door, you know they have their keys, but they're just too lazy to fish them out of their bag?

            I never let them in, out of principle. Maybe I would if I was by the door at that exact moment to let them in (hasn't happened yet), but there's no way I'm disturbing whatever I'm doing to appease their laziness.

            Fuzzy_Dunlop @coolerthantv | 29 May '12, 15:15 | X
    • this thread is great

      cat_race | 29 May '12, 15:25 | X
      • it's one of those threads where you can't work out if the implications for the OP are worse if

        a) they're telling the truth
        or
        b) it's made up and they're trolling

        brusma @cat_race | 29 May '12, 15:31 | X
        Cementimental and joeymahone this'd this
        • haha yes!

          completely.

          cat_race @brusma | 29 May '12, 15:34 | X
    • DiSers: baiting the men in white coats since 2001

      brusma | 29 May '12, 15:30 | X
      monoshono this'd this
    • I forget my keys from time to time

      but I usually just txt one of my flatmates if so and they can throw the keys out the window and I can catch them.

      The other day one of my flatmates threw the keys but missed the open window and smashed the closed one. I was covered in glass, and luckily reacted by looking down otherwise I may have gotten glass in my eye. I no longer forget my keys.

      Antelope | 29 May '12, 15:35 | X
      • how hard did he throw them to break a window?

        no-class @Antelope | 29 May '12, 15:42 | X
        • Well he was on the other side of the room

          and I think he was a bit over-excited. The keys were attached to some pretty hefty key-chains so that contributed to it. I live among insane people.

          Antelope @no-class | 29 May '12, 15:45 | X
      • i would throw my keys to moousee

        and now i don't have a bottle opener on my keys anymore

        cat_race @Antelope | 29 May '12, 15:48 | X
        • I can't even imagine how many times

          I've had to use someones key-chain bottle-opener, they are incredibly handy and I ought to invest in one.

          Antelope @cat_race | 30 May '12, 04:50 | X
    • Did you let him in?

      skellywager | 29 May '12, 15:36 | X
      • nah

        still_here @skellywager | 29 May '12, 15:38 | X
    • You probably should have just let him in

      I couldn't get in my house once, knowing one of my parents were in I kept knocking and I knocked so hard I smashed the glass and cut my hand open.

      To be fair we didn't have a doorbell and there was another major door to go through aswell as our first front door went into the vineyard, so was kind of external. So understandable my knocks weren't heard I guess. Still annoying though.

      chris_is_cool | 29 May '12, 15:42 | X
      • I knocked so hard I smashed the glass and cut my hand open.

        our front door went into the vineyard

        brusma @chris_is_cool | 29 May '12, 15:47 | X
        -dan-, andyvine, and Icarus-Smicarus this'd this
        • the second part of that is really where the attention should be

          cat_race @brusma | 29 May '12, 15:50 | X
          cocodaLOL, Si_Badvibes, Cementimental, and umlaut_ampersand this'd this
        • :D

          ohgood @brusma | 29 May '12, 15:52 | X
    • HAHAHA TROLLED

      not really though.

      I don't really understand why some of you losers have got so indignant over all this. If it makes you feel better, the guy literally never takes his key with him anywhere, so he had it coming tbh. Just unfortunate that i was here. But simultaneously fortunate that i'm a bit of a cunt.

      still_here | 29 May '12, 15:59 | X
      • Well, you know, you attempt to make your profile look like a girl's

        so that implies you're a bit of a dab hand with the trolling. And you normally post everything with a massive wedge of hyperbole, so I think everyone's just jaded.

        TheoGB @still_here | 29 May '12, 16:30 | X
        • sorry...s_h is a guy?

          you fuckin kidding me

          Silkyskillz11 @TheoGB | 29 May '12, 16:55 | X
          • not so proud of those pms anymore huh

            still_here @Silkyskillz11 | 29 May '12, 17:02 | X
            • nice try, squirt

              Silkyskillz11 @still_here | 29 May '12, 17:04 | X
            • someone hitting on someone else through pm

              is nowhere near as weird as not just opening the door.

              cat_race @still_here | 29 May '12, 17:26 | X
          • Abhorrent behaviour.

            TheWza @Silkyskillz11 | 29 May '12, 21:31 | X
        • I don't think that s_h is that profficient, all he has done is stick up a photo of someone else

          from the description of the story and without looking at the profile I had assumed s_h was a guy anyway.

          I thought aishapra was far better

          creakyknees @TheoGB | 29 May '12, 19:48 | X
    • I hate one of my flatmates too.

      poptimusgrime | 29 May '12, 20:27 | X
      • Oh, the best time was when I went in for a shower and locked the front door

        (because I like to lock the front door when showering or shitting) and my flatmate came back and was banging on the door for about 20 minutes and calling me repeatedly. When I got out the shower and opened the door, I said "Why didn't you use your key?" and he said "Oh yeah..."

        poptimusgrime @poptimusgrime | 29 May '12, 20:30 | X
    • This reminds me of one my girlfriend's insane former housemates.

      I knocked on their door, then a full half an hour later she opened the door. She explained she'd been waiting for me to wander away from the door so she could make out who it was from a second floor window - she thought it was a policeman with a gun.

      That was her FIRST assumption. Terrifyingly crazy person.

      powerfulmellow | 30 May '12, 02:27 | X
    • So is someone gonna make a funny song about this

      And post it on Youtube along with a picture of still_here, his picture, his parents' picture, and phone number and address and blood type?

      in_limbo | 30 May '12, 03:22 | X
    • dude

      let him in

      DarwinDude | 30 May '12, 05:22 | X
      • hmm

        DarwinDude @DarwinDude | 30 May '12, 05:26 | X
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