Your are viewing a read-only archive of the old DiS boards. Please hit the Community button above to engage with the DiS !
I like reading it in the "Look Around You" voice.
shower with compliments in most scinere was possible, listen to what she says is troubling her then hate on that and agree she should be upset. Even if shes crying about the price of weetabix it will work.
i agree that u should b upset. damn that weetabix, girl. i'm hatin on that damn weetabix.
dry your tears on this wiping device.
is also helpful :)
I meant to this Verbal's near-genius post.
I don't even know who Tustin Timberlake is.
Jew Kids on the Block
i'm never near any crying women
even better if you can get her to sit on a chair which you then balance on your back whilst doing the press-ups
Once she has had time to wipe her eyes and nose, ask her what is wrong in a soft voice, and don’t expect a coherent answer.
Last part gives away this was definitely written by a man
Pat the crying female awkwardly on one shoulder, and do not in any circumstance embrace her. You may still let her cry on you, but do not give any indication that you are enjoying this or are experiencing any emotions other than surprise and bewilderment. Act thoroughly confused at this uninvited gesture.
leave for a bit
say "there, there *name*. There there."
Repeat as necessary until tear glands have ceased their involuntary flexing. Then ask what time dinner is.
When the woman appears to be running out of tears, it is acceptable to either embrace her gently and quickly around the shoulders if you are familiar, or gather her to your chest if you two are intimate. This helps to squeeze out any leftover tears.
Women’s tear-producing organs work at 300 percent of their normal capacity when they are menstruating. Keep this in mind.
Or words of sympathy if there are no ropes around.
Walk out of room before they can answer
Place head in fridge for next ten minutes
just be normal i.e. be concerned, hand on their back and offer tissues. that's what i do. if i'm crying in public i've always felt better when nice women come over and ask the matter is and be like my mum.
It almost sounds like something poosie would write.
run her a bath, sitck a bit of Lionel on, get the ham & cheese toasties on, pour her a large glass of wine and tell her she's okay-lookin'.
curl up in a ball.
maybe both for greater effect.
Thankfully I will now know to reconsider the quality of tissue paper and handkerchiefs to carry around with me.