An infinite crowd of mathematicians enters a bar.
The first one orders a pint, the second one a half pint, the third one a quarter pint...
"gotcha", says the bartender - and pours two pints.

Statistics Canada is hiring mathematicians. Three recent graduates are invited for an interview: one has a degree in pure mathematics, another one in applied math, and the third one obtained his B.Sc. in statistics.
All three are asked the same question: "What is one third plus two thirds?"
The pure mathematician: "It's one."
The applied mathematician takes out his pocket calculator, punches in the numbers, and replies: "It's 0.999999999."
The statistician: "What do you want it to be?"

One day, Jesus said to his disciples: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3x squared plus 8x minus 9."
A man who had just joined the disciples looked very confused and asked Peter: "What, on Earth, does he mean by that?"
Peter replied: "Don't worry - it's just another one of his parabolas."

A mathematician has spent years trying to prove the Riemann hypothesis - without success. Finally, he decides to sell his soul to the devil in exchange for a proof. The devil promises to deliver a proof within four weeks.
Four weeks pass, but nothing happens. Half a year later, the devil shows up again - in a rather gloomy mood.

## Nope.

## something about electrical engineers and too many js

## Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?

To get to the same side!!!!!!!!11!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!3

## I've decided this is easily the best post in this thread

## why did 6 8 7?

because 7 8 pi!

## lolz

An infinite crowd of mathematicians enters a bar.

The first one orders a pint, the second one a half pint, the third one a quarter pint...

"gotcha", says the bartender - and pours two pints.

## ha ha ha

Statistics Canada is hiring mathematicians. Three recent graduates are invited for an interview: one has a degree in pure mathematics, another one in applied math, and the third one obtained his B.Sc. in statistics.

All three are asked the same question: "What is one third plus two thirds?"

The pure mathematician: "It's one."

The applied mathematician takes out his pocket calculator, punches in the numbers, and replies: "It's 0.999999999."

The statistician: "What do you want it to be?"

## there must be a joke about a Canadian mathematician saying 'eh' ('a'/'A')

or something

I'll work on it

## my sides

What is sour, yellow, and equivalent to the axiom of choice?

Zorn's lemon.

## I'm here all week

What is purple and commutative?

An abelian grape.

## You could've just posted the link, pal

## i don't know what you are talking about

## except friday - not here on friday

One day, Jesus said to his disciples: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3x squared plus 8x minus 9."

A man who had just joined the disciples looked very confused and asked Peter: "What, on Earth, does he mean by that?"

Peter replied: "Don't worry - it's just another one of his parabolas."

## megalol

I'm sorry", he says. "I couldn't prove the Riemann hypothesis either. But" - and his face lightens up - "I think I found a really interesting lemma

## heres the first bit

A mathematician has spent years trying to prove the Riemann hypothesis - without success. Finally, he decides to sell his soul to the devil in exchange for a proof. The devil promises to deliver a proof within four weeks.

Four weeks pass, but nothing happens. Half a year later, the devil shows up again - in a rather gloomy mood.

## hehe...'lemma'

## last one - bored now

Was ist paradox an der Analysis?

A: Man faltet, um zu glätten...

hahaha

## brilliant

## I don't get it

## don't really get this one.

## Doesn't really work

## this is good, really!

http://www.spinnerdisc.com/einstein.html

## I can confirm this is good, really