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IT'S NOT YOUR FART D:
But, honestly, I hate farting. I hate public displays of bodily discharge.
I really don't believe this happens.
Then again mine are usually relatively odourless.
but the groom realised he was marrying a right shit.
...if you're horrified by your own smell then something is seriously wrong and the structural integrity of your underwear is under threat
It was a winters day and I was wearing a great big overcoat, unbuttoned at the top.
As I ran, I accidentally let a little fart go, just a little snifter and didn't think it would cause any problems.
But then I got in the lift - which was crowded to capacity - and as the doors closed this unbelievable eggy corpse smell started to leak out of the top of my overcoat, just the most hideous gag-inducing atrocity, and within seconds it had obviously filled the entire elevator because people started shuffling around, coughing, muttering, and when the doors opened EVERYONE piled out of the lift (including me of course, frowning and looking around accusingly) in spite of the fact that several buttons for higher floors had been pushed.
PLEASE SIT DOWN