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...explain your day.
(Idea stole from someone in bumblers thread)
have a bit of a fiddle
I put on my make up
To be the only girl to walk right home to you (not you)
Maybe touch my boobs too
but your body is a woman. Could you handle that?
I'd prefer it to be my own cock but nevertheless, I'd have a go. No cum in the mouth tho - down my chest please
or sex with men like women do
Nosh that off.
I feel bad about who I am.
-get up and read the paper while having breakfast
-head out for a coffee and a bit of shopping (if needed)
-head home for an hour of relaxation (crossword, probably) before lunch
hang on, is it a winter's day or summer's day?
and do a jiggly dance to it in the street.
after I've had some cereal
Boss: Why, not?
DMK: Im really sick
Boss: How sick is too sick? Important filing to do today buddy?
DMK: Well I've stuck a load of condiments up my ass and am firing ping pong balls out of my newly formed clunge?
Otherwise, I'd probably freak out, tbh. I like going to football and cupping my balls while watching tele, not sure I could handle life as a woman.
You shouldn't be freaked out. You've got boobies and a cooca now. Make the most of it.
Is that what women call that? Definitely want to be a man then.
I don't call it anything other than "my lady parts".
It sounds suspciously like another euphemism. Are you trying to tell me you have some sort of genital schizophrenia?
I'd feel rushed, because 24 hours isn't enough, really.
and check myself into the hospital for testing.
to make myself airtight
i'd have thought there'd be more suitable 'plugs' at my disposal, mind.
then probably learn to be more careful around other peoples balls.
probably whore myself out relentlessly all day
i'd make a killing
like how he can't die in groundhog day?
2. jump around and let my breasts whip about
3. hire a male prostitute out the yellow pages to give me a good stuffing
4. become irrational
Every single one of you would put on a dressing gown and post about it on DiS
I'm allergic to dressing gowns
Bring on the men, I say.
'hire a male prostitute out the yellow pages to give me a good stuffing '.
I reckon that means you're secretly gay. Sorry to out you.
are probably still curious. it's the one thing where a man cannot understand the sensation.
and don't give me 'childbirth' i've taken poos that weighed as much as a premature baby
so if i was in a womans body for a day only its one of the few things i'd have a chance of experiencing (unless i was lucky and got switched during a period)....i'm also curious to experience an orgasm as a woman as it seems a lot more of a complex sensation
most other things you could get upto in a day as a woman simply wouldn't over such an unobtainable experience
given the scenario
Then buy myself some sexy underwear, just to see what it's like to be fitted.
select female looking for female = fast-track to sapphic bliss
that my girlfriend is secretely a lesbian so she will still bonk me.
if successful, I would rejoice at the thought of never having to buy food again. If unsuccessful I would just have a twiddle with myself.
but lady milk is like a nutritious, life preserving broth, I understand
and you have the right hormones (pregnany ones) to lactate, though there are some circumstances were women can lactate without being pregnant.
(i had a friend at college who was worried because she was)
they can make me lactate
i'd at least get long hair, so I kind of see where you're coming from.
it'd be grim waking up as a woman with a number one crop.
Wondering why and how this had happened to me. What the fucks going on? Is any of this real? Has someone done this to me? Who? Why? HOW DAMMIT HOW?
Then I'd play with my boobs and have a fiddle down there.
then practice throwing stuff in the air and catching it, like an erectile hoopla if you will
I would be a LAD for the day.
I would wank myself blind.
Ideally Mrs Knees would also have changed
That's how it works right?
You've ruined my thread. GET OUT.
I'm intrigued as to what would happen the next day.
my first priority would be to sneak out of my boyfriend's house before he realises I have a cock.
Wake him up by slapping him in the face with it.
I would love to do that, but I think he might be a bit squeamish about it all :(
Stress about not having any clothes to wear
Phone in sick to work
Go back to bed and play with myself for the rest of the day
Get a chinese take away
Go to a club and get picked up, probably wind up getting spiked, freak out the guy or gal by waking up as a man next morning. WHEY!
*Possibly also get annoyed that my tits were getting in the way when playing PS3 and putting me off my game. Depending upon how big my tits were.
just to see if I still enjoyed it as much.
All I know is this:
he went out for his walk a man
and came home female.
Out the back gate with his stick,
wearing his gardening kecks,
an open-necked shirt,
and a jacket in Harris tweed I'd patched at the elbows myself.
He liked to hear
the first cuckoo of spring
then write to The Times.
I'd usually heard it
days before him
but I never let on.
I'd heard one that morning
while he was asleep;
just as I heard,
at about 6 p.m.,
a faint sneer of thunder up in the woods
a sudden heat
at the back of my knees.
He was late getting back.
I was brushing my hair at the mirror
and running a bath
when a face
swam into view
next to my own.
The eyes were the same.
But in the shocking V of the shirt were breasts.
When he uttered my name in his woman's voice I passed out.
* * *
Life has to go on.
I put it about that he was a twin
and this was his sister
come down to live
while he himself
was working abroad.
And at first I tried to be kind;
blow-drying his hair till he learnt to do it himself,
lending him clothes till he started to shop for his own,
sisterly, holding his soft new shape in my arms all night.
Then he started his period.
One week in bed.
Two doctors in.
Three painkillers four times a day.
to the powers that be
demanding full-paid menstrual leave twelve weeks per year.
I see him still,
his selfish pale face peering at the moon
through the bathroom window.
The curse, he said, the curse.
Don't kiss me in public,
he snapped the next day,
I don't want folk getting the wrong idea.
It got worse.
After the split I would glimpse him
out and about,
entering glitzy restaurants
on the arms of powerful men —
though I knew for sure
there'd be nothing of that
if he had his way —
or on TV
telling the women out there
how, as a woman himself,
he knew how we felt.
His flirt's smile.
The one thing he never got right
was the voice.
A cling peach slithering out from its tin.
I gritted my teeth.
And this is my lover, I said,
the one time we met
at a glittering ball
under the lights,
among tinkling glass,
and watched the way he stared
at her violet eyes,
at the blaze of her skin,
at the slow caress of her hand on the back of my neck;
and saw him picture
her bite at the fruit of my lips,
my red wet cry in the night
as she shook his hand
saying How do you do;
and I noticed then his hands, her hands,
the clash of their sparkling rings and their painted nails
flirt in front of male wishpig, so she would check me out and then the next day be consumed with guilt :D
stick stuff up my cunt
we have a match silkysllz11 mear ithica, please pay your fee to sean
bet you'd wear uggs though.
without feeling awkward.
use lots of sex toys.
thus dispelling the age old question
after all, we're superior
But in reverse, and with more fingering.
I do not feel like I am a 'member' of a 'club of men'.
I happen to be male.
I don't think the word 'member' is a good way to see this (although I appreciate that if you are in a group of women campaigning in an organised way against generalised predjudices, then some may feel that it is a bit like this.......but I don't think that being a 'member' of a gender, is the ideal concept