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Martin Luther King had his dream, and I have mine – granted, mine is a lot more egotistical and selfish and not really concerned with social utility, but I'm 17 years old, give me a break."
The 'Anal Probe Finds Parsnips and Pigs' Tails' link just to the right of the article there?
at least the Guardian have learned one thing from the whole Max Gogarty fiasco...
and found the page you're probably referring to.
"...let's call a spade a spade..."
Made me giggle.
fuck off you total cunt.
She's got blue fucking hair.
but fuck, rejected from all those universities with those predicted grades? That would get me pretty upset too.
Rejected because she's a wanker. Even the foreign students had her sussed.
But you think one of those places would have offered her a place - they let enough wankers in. Are they really all looking for people with four As, or A*s?
When I was applying for Physics at unit in 1993 anyone wanting to do English pretty much had to give up unless they had 2As and a B. Okay, it's 3As now but that's more a reflection on how many A-Levels people do now.
The fact is that arts study is still massively over-subscribed; if you want to get into a good University then study science or maths because they're crying out for people.
(this is about six years ago). I applied to do English at pretty much all the same places as her, and got accepted to all of them, and that was based on predicted three As.
So glad I'm not trying to do the same thing again now.
Wish i could read more of her... if only she had a blog or something?...
...(but I didn't have coffee, because I don't like coffee, but "having a coffee" is like an expression, though, isn't it?)...'
From March 30:
'Also, because of Saturday, and the moderately inferior music taste of the Cartels, I have started listening to the Cribs, who are actually really good. They're sort of like Friendly Fires in the way that all their songs blur together in my mind to form an indistinctive mass of sound. Good sound, but rather incomprehensible sound. I think it's because they concentrate more on the way the instruments sound than on the lyrics or the vocal melodies or whatever. So I can't really differentiate between songs. '
Maybe ribenasflavourisdeeplypalatable.blogspot.com was already taken.
(to be fair though the martin luther king comment is fairly self deprecating)
Though ripping on a 14 year old's poetry is like shooting fish in a barrel tbf
thank FUCK the internet was primitive when I was 14 and Homestead, Tripod and Geocities are dead.
it's like the fish are dead....
cos I don't want someone that annoying going to classes near me.
but I was no way near as bolshy, and full of faux self-deprecation as her when I was her age.
There's a good chance that fullerov already has about 50+ people that annoying going to classes near me.
And what you remember being like as a fresher and what you would actually seem like if you met yourself now are pretty different. If you weren't nearly as bolshy at that age you've obviously got a fuck load more bolshy as time's gone on. ;-)
I mean students annoyed me enough when I was one. I doubt she is the worst.
Not really so much as a prospective undergraduate.
Bit of "world weary" humour in there, constant pop cultural references. Like a nick hornby book. Clingy, superficially self deprecating, egotistic, painfully "contemporary" etc.
If it was an excersise in writing to the style of a publication she's done well. In terms of writing anything that causes a bit of empathy from the reader? nah, cos i don't give a shit.
look at the weekly top artists and click on the "unique to this group" button, guess what's at number 10?
Is that from people not turning off their scrobbler while listening to podcasts and watching films?
I don't know that she has. I'm sure that a large proportion are fairly sympathetic.
I actually feel neither sympathy nor antipathy towards her. I'm just in it for the laughs.
Though I'm not sure they go in for this sort of blog of death.
The new 'I'd hit it'
but i guess that's partly an effect of having spent too much time reading actual student magazines. at least she can construct a complex sentence and seems to broadly understand the meanings of most of the words she uses (though to be fair, this probably had the advantage of being edited to fuck)
I spotted a few run-on sentences in the (many) parenthetical asides.
"Some are being made available even before they are even released, such as Jeffrey Archer’s novel, Only Time Will Tell, which comes out next month.".
Even even!!! By comparison she's doing pretty well.
You seem awfully keen to defend her, Theo. Do you have any disclosure to make her?
no sorry, can't do it.
but yeah :'D
." It's not a case of black people seeing a mass of impenetrable whiteness at Russell Group universities and therefore being scared out of applying. I mean, we got a man on the moon. We didn't let our fear of aliens stop us from breakdancing on that over-sized lump of rock, did we?"
good luck to her.
*from her weblog*
Life is a bitch. Then you die. You die without ever having the chance to be further educated at that quaint little college on the outskirts of a bustling student village surrounded by an almost overwhelming atmosphere of knowledge and learning and intellectuality, in which every day there is discussion and debate in an environment where ideas can flourish and thrive.
*it's all daytime tv and masturbation as far as i can remember*
don’t seem to realise, is that EVERYONE who applies to Oxbridge is predicted at least three As at A-level. There’s no automatic right to a place just because you meet their minimum standard. The universities are looking for that something extra.
It’s also true however, that a lot of people (including David Cameron) don’t seem to realise just how much a private education, family ties, old-school networks and the wealth that allows for ‘character-building’ gap years can help certain applicants give themselves an edge over the rest of the crowd.
It’s probably a bit different now, but when I applied to study architecture at Cambridge, there were 30 places on the course, (that’s for the entire university, not just the college), and upwards of 600 applicants chasing those places.
It wasn’t necessarily the best place to study architecture (back in 1996 if was one of about 4 or 5 universities, along with the Bartlett at UCL, Sheffield, Newcastle, Bath and Cardiff, that, depending on who you spoke to, had the best course), but everyone who even entertained the idea of attending one of those would automatically apply to Cambridge, as a wildcard if nothing else.
getting into top universities has been a lottery for years.
and the parents of students her age that the reason you don't get into the university of your choice is because DER TOREEZ IS EVIL!!!!!!!!1111
Here are my options:
1. Go to Queen Mary (although I don't think I want to because I probably won't get on campus or university accommodation, though they are 13th on league tables for English.)
2. Decline Queen Mary and apply thorough Extra to Southampton, Sheffield or Exeter- universities I have no pro's or con's for because I didn't apply to them (or consider applying to them, because I am stupid).
Boo hoo. Suck it up and go to Queen Mary. And accept the fact that it's not a Russell uni like Southampton or Sheffield. And learn that (as much as I wish it weren't true) no matter how good your grades, the blue hair that you keep mentioning like a tryhard isn't seen as some kind of trailblazing sign of free thought and individuality, it stands out as a naïve symbol of defiance to some pretty key people - which ain't the best basis for Oxbridge entry.
She seems really well read and clever at her subject(s). But she comes across as needy and far from wise. Which (on top of the blue hair) may be one of the reasons for not getting into Oxford & co. Based on her writings, a bright future as a Guardian hack lays ahead.
could be because i'm not in the running for sneer of the year award though
A pink aardvark?
remember that pac-man clone game he had commissioned that featured him in the role of pac-man destroying a load of trees? just sitting around in his fabulous mansion, playing an arcade cabinet, on a game that featured him being a dick? who would want to play that game?
SUCH A DICK
Gabe, I will pay you good money to make me a video game; a side-scrolling beat-em-up in which I walk from left to right punching and kicking puppies, kittens and babies to death. Soundtrack by Anamanguchi. Work with me here, Gabe
He’s basically a proto-Tony Soprano: they both share a common desire to dominate the neighbourhood in which they grew up, and a disappointment with the son that seems disinterested in following his father’s example.
The man had hidden depths. To caricature him as a DICK is a little disingenuous.
but show me the episode in which Tony Soprano sits around playing a Galaga clone with a picture of his head of the ship and rival mob bosses as the enemies, and I will also label him a dick
He didn’t like Galaga – preferring Galaxian and its one-shot simplicity. ‘It teaches you more about respect,’ he says.
the videogame tastes of classic film and TV characters: potential blog.
Charles Foster Kane all playing Line Rider, a wistful tear in his eye
‘You stuuupid woman,’ he says, as Lara Croft gets sliced by a rotary saw as a result of the clumsy movement controls and collision detection.
imposing his own unique set of order on the falling pieces, although he is inevitably overwhelmed, with disasterous results
I look like a huge wanker.
Its bright colours, occasional but whimsical violence and slapdash attitude to high-velocity physics are a necessary and welcome relief from the dark and disturbing environs in which I make my living, Diane.
quiet, peaceful, serene.
UNTIL BERT RACCOON WAKES UP! the cunt.
Cyril Sneer is a DICK and Bert Raccoon is a CUNT?
Just who's side are you on here?
anyone who tells you any different is selling something
But the Roland Barthes comment: sad times.
She sounds like a total plank but almost anyone at 17 is intolerable. A little knowledge is a dangerous thing - never more true than with a moderately intelligent teenager.
She's a 17 year old English student...Some of you are liek...50 right?
- there is very little lasting record of my teenage lamery, which was much worse than this, I'm sure.
But the funny thing is, if she was a character in a HiP n QuIrKy indie dramedy, y'all muthafuckas would be going 'oh she is so me'.
And, you know, student in being an annoying belm shocker.
Is there such a thing?
she's 17, chill out and give her a break. im sure you were all versions of yourself at 17 you'd not be embarrassed by at all now, pfft
she's fucking awful.
Glad we cleared that up.
Perhaps if we could institute radical reform on a fundamental level and destroy the old bourgeois, elitist ways we wouldn't even be having this discussion.
I'm glad that no national newspaper asked me to write anything at the time, and tbh the Guardian are being a bit naughty for paying her to entertain us all.
Also, wanting do something, trying your best and failing does suck arse, and at 17 you have no sense of proportion whatsoever.
I'm pretty sure I'm far more of a cunt now than I was at 17.
for a project I wrote a "manifesto" which was slightly fascist in a Logan's Run sense and set up a room full of slogans that literally flashed red every 3 seconds.
When you reach the cunt Everest like that at age 18 the only upside is that however a sorry piece of work you are now you can sleep peacefully knowing you will never be able to reach for those heights* [*deep DEEP depths] again even if you tried
I imagine we would have agreed to start *a flat hierarchy thought collective* but fallen out because the other person wasn't visionary enough.
I've always been pretty boring though, at 17 I was far more interested in making my guitar sound like Jonny Greenwood's than about writing some faux-intelligent woe-is-me piece about university.
Am I really the only one? Oh Dis.
I was trying to get Laid.
I'm still amazed I got into university cos I just applied on the last day before the deadline with very little preparation. Oxford rejected me. The other places didn't.
but I certainly knew enough people who were similar or had other youthful qualities they've left behind.
I do feel a bit bad now :(
Put the URL into google and there's a massive (and far meaner) thread on thestudentroom... just read a bit of it and it also says something about people writing harsh comments on her blog as well.
It struck an awkward balance between making me giggle and severely angrying up the blood.