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Shall we make this the banal thread? Or a smut thread? Someone say something. Please.
Maybe we should think of a trolly thred to wake everyone up a bit
If you like nice baking trays, that place will be like fucking Disneyworld.
Greatest shop on earth (but not where I got my baking tray from).
I bought a lovely le creuset frying pan
I have a 26cm non stick one. She's my pride and joy.
I was trying to think of something to post in here that was both banal AND smutty and then I received an email from someone with the surname 'Bigwood'.
The best name I encountered recently was Barry Fagg.
it's one of their 'AmazonBasics' range but I think it's worth the risk given the price.
and ive never been to Dublin
Does the job.
...cables do exactly the same job regardless of price.
i shouldnt even be on here.
SOMEONE DO SOMETHING EXCITING! or start a fight or something!
I think avocado gives me a headache as I always seem to get a headache after I eat some avocado. Boy, do I love avocado though.
I'm gonna ride to the supermarket in a minute.
I have a BIKE.
Got a text off CC at lunch, it ended with "got any plans for the weekend", which was a bit like, "Um, yeah, with you, duh", not that I said that, girls are weird.
"yeah, i'm being forced to spend time with this person I really don't like on Sunday. She's such a drag but we're going to see frankenstien so at least I won't have to talk to her the whole time"
i'd find that funny. she might not.
I was just like, yeah, quiz tonight, sleeping tomorrow, really looking forward to Sunday. Maybe you should go out with her instead.
She seems like a bit too much effort for me I'm afraid. Soz.
...but she's asking if you have y'know, /plans/...
Kiss de gurl
I haven't snogged someone in a very long time. I think I've forgotten how. I was always quite bad. I tend to get very out of breath, which is quite unappealling. This is all going to go very badly wrong.
I think you're working too hard. NEVER do the washing machine move.
It's been a while. I just suddenly become very aware of my breathing, and suddenly realise how loud and prominent it seems, and as soon as that happens, you start trying to change it, which never works, then you panic a bit and before you know it you're hyperventilating. And I have a nervous tremor at the best of times, it'll be like I've got Parkinsons.
Maybe I should take a hip flask and get fucked in the cinema.
Have a few drinks and stop worrying.
but anything can be arranged, for a price.
Also, I agree with her, stop being a pussy.
And I will try and refrain from pussyness.
if you feel yourself getting panicky, just take slow deep breaths out of your nose.
When you're saying goodbye (or if the moment arises before then), you have to be a dominating man. Put your hands on her face/neck GENTLY and pull her in for a big snog...but a gentle slow nice one...not a slobbery quick horrible one.
No strangling. Not until she asks you to.
HEAR ME ROAR *cough*, YARRRGH.
Do you have plans or don't you? I would at this point struggle not to say 'um yeah, with you, duh' to her face. Or at least say- quiz tonight, stuff tomorrow. Are you still on for sunday?
I think when we next MEAT up, you're going to have to show me your text chain josh, so I can work out whether it's you who's not finalising plans properly, or whether she's just being a bit daft. *over-protective hands on hips gesture*
we very definitely made plans in person last week to get brunch then watch the play, and she's the one who's bought the tickets so I'm sure she's aware of it. It just sounded a bit odd is all.
I WAS IN A GOOD PLACE AND NOW I AM PANICKING AGAIN :(
be the man and remind her.
I'm sure she'll text back sortly to say 'yes, me too!!'.
Also- top tip when it comes to your breathing- the second you start noticing how you breath, it's almost impossible to stop being aware of it until the stressful situation has passed. SO, please don't fixate on it, Just go for it. it doesn't have to be a 5 minute expedition with scuba gear- you can start with some soft kisses and then let them get deeper, and then just take it from there, ok?
I've just been playing around with this anti-snoring device, it really does make you breathe better. Might wear it on Sunday. Nothing sexier than a lump of grey plastic hanging out of your nose. "It's for medicinal reasons, baby."
When I've been on the jagers, apparently it's like a central line train pulling away from a station at speed.
ITS PORN EVERYBODY!
SHUCKS POSTED PORN!
i've got a twirl on my desk. but the only place its going besides in my mouth is into my tea.
Or my daim bar back.
You people make me fat.
will probably smash those doors in pretty soon.
then a twirl. Now a pack of mini toblerones.
Do you plan on eating anything from the other 4 food groups this afternoon?
A fat one.
(send me some :( please)
But I know nothing about building websites, so it held very little interest for me I'm afraid.
Good luck though.
It's like a little clip thing you put in your nose, sort of like swimmers use, which opens your nostrils better. Makes sense. The only issue is I won't know if it's working because I'm not aware of my own snoring. Maybe I should film myself sleeping. Is that creepy? It seems creepy.
no need to stop yourself snoring if it doesnt annoy anybody.
I always wondered. Are they not really uncomfortable to wear?
Apparently it's not just for the benefit of other people though, because you don't snore, and breathe better, you sleep better, then wake up with more energy and don't snack and LOSE WEIGHT. Miracle cure. But yeah, I will feel a little bit sad doing it all alone. Does a snore make a sound if there's no one there to hear it?
Don't know how comfortable it is, it's quite soft rubbery plastic, I imagine you get used to it pretty quick.
I suppose i never really thought about the other benefits from it. I only snore when im drunk. I snore like pig when im drunk
is this the one that this guy claims to have "invented"?
They've been around for fucking years!
He says the key competitor is those plasters that go on top of your nose. He did show me an American example on the same principal as his, but his was definitely better.
I'll just ask it here instead
there's this fancy psychoanalytic theory by this dead French guy that basically boils down to this: if you recognise the question as directed at you, then it's directed at you, even if it's not directed at you.
Make of that what you will.
more the flexibility
LOOK AT HIS CHOPS AT THE END!
i'm going to celebrate by getting tanked in the pub.
but they misheard him. Poor little tyke.
"Why the shitting hell"
Yeah that's right guys, now that thread looks pretty sweet doesn't it?
...he is getting married tomorrow and I am the best man. Staying at his tonight to make sure he doesn't flee the country. He is allowing me to take him out for 3, yes that's right count em, 3 beers tonight.
Probably be pretty smashed at the wedding though.
In my inifninte wisdom, I decided to throw a party the night before I got married, and so got shitfaced and couldn't sleep, and ended up getting up and going for a jog around the Isle of Bute in the 4am inky dawn, and talking to a rock that i thought was a seal.
good luck with the speech. remember, it's better to be unfunny but still invited to the Christening than vice versa.
For the first time in nearly 5 weeks! I ought to feel excited, but I'm quite stressed out just now, and it's making my emotions go a bit funny.
Still, it made me smile when my sister broke the news to the dog last night that I was comnig home, and they went crackerdog. I got to speak to Dolly on the phone and after speaking to me she started running round the kitchen table and wouldn't stop :D
I haven't been home since Christmas. Don't have any plans to either.
I was up mid Feb for my birthday. Start of March for my mum's (this was a whistlestop tour though- less than 2 days). I tend to go back every 6 weeks or so. It would be more if I have the chance (the cash)!
I've seen at least half of Braveheart though, so I'm probably sorted.
and i've never seen Braveheart. I well wanna go. We got offered a drink by two scottish men yesterday. They were old, bald and ming though.
most drinking establishments in Scotland.
Friendly but mingin.
I was hoping a sexy scotsman in a kilt would be there waiting for me. A girl can dream....
"wanting to get off with ginger trannies" thing.
I don't know.
YEV GORT ER LOVLE SMIYAL
and gets into a big strop blaming the english for all the ills that befall them despite the rich scottish folk being as complicit, then yep.
Totally sorted. Absolutely fuckall has changed.
DONE. We can stay a night at PO Towers to 'gather ourselves' and then hit the road and DO STUFF.
If we can drink lots of whisky? And wear tartan? And can I do my Scottish accent?
(and indeed, I do them every weekend of my life :D).
ARGH. I have forgotten to pack a mini-kilt. Will need to buy a new one.
because my parents have gutted and renovated my bedroom and it has a double bed for the first time ever which I'd quite like to enjoy. Double beds are still a novelty for me since I only got one when I got my own flat for the first time.
You want to try doing a 20 stretch
my backs a bit tight, might do some yoga when I get in.
or have a nap, whichever feels right at the time.
This is making me smile a lot.
i love disco.
they'll still be wearing skinny jeans and indie type jackets? I really hope so. I know I will be.
don't fancy them or anything
bum hang makes them look like theyve shat themselves i think that itll probably be quite apt.
...are an abomination.
then I accidentally bought some and theyre not too bad. Feels like i'm wearing NOTHING AT ALL.
they should only make skinny jeans up to a 28 inch waist.
Anyone with a waist bigger than that needs to wear a normal trouser or your going to look slightly out of proportion.
Also, pull your fucking trousers up, no one wants to see which comic is printed on your comedy childs Y-fronts.
I'm 32 and hardly chub. DISCRIMINTATION FUCK OFF
in skinny jeans have 28 inch waists.
Or people with 32 inch waists who are 6'7" tall.
Either way shorty mcchubster, you look like an egg with two pipe cleaners sticking out the bottom when you wear skinny jeans. AND PULL YOUR FUCKING JEANS UP! I don't need to see your hulk skivvies.
the only jeans
everyone else needs to wear normal jeans or be mocked for the foolish beings they are.
I am kinda unwell with a cold. It's at the sneezy eyewatering stage. But on the plus side I'm glad I have some explanation of why I felt so awful and fainted yesterday. The drilling outside my room seems to have stopped (for now). I've wasted most of the day going back and forth to the laundry room. My friend is coming to visit tonight so must tidy room/wash sheets.
Also got my first urge to not be a vegan today when I walked past some chocolate. I resisted (been a week and half, not bad).
They're too big for one person to manage with. Doubly annoying if your laundary room is far away. You have my sympathies.
This reminds me. I went to put my sheets in the wash this morning and someone had put an empty washing powder box back in the cupboard! Can you believe that?! Animals, these people are! ANIMALS!
I'm on the 5th floor. It's a five minute walk. I hate my life.
Do not mess with me getting to Bournemouth.
good luck with that.
UPS VAN JUST CAME DOWN THE HILL TOWARD MY BUILDING
THEN TURNED LEFT AT THE CORNER AND WENT THE OTHER WAY
NOW SMASHING MY HEAD ON THE KEYBOARD
listen to some disco. it turns out the trammps' first album is amazing. i knew 'disco inferno' couldnt be a one off
I hope chopper bikes make a wacky comeback.