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but you're not selling it very well.

Meet the tools?

http://www.e4.com/toolacademy/meetthetools.html

but you are selling it very well.

you said something different.

Its probably on 4od...be warned. Its an hour and 45 minutes of pure LAD and some odd bitchy girls. One girl keeps calling her boyfriend gay infront of everyone and then he cries!

I find it hard to watch those kinds of programs full of horrible hateful cunts, ie. any reality TV show. It's depressing for me to know these people exist.
Glad you're enjoying it though.

Don't think I'd last more than half an hour before I smashed my TV (if I had a TV, that is)

if it was an academy run by the band Tool

after the guy "fingered" the girl in the loo, another LAD saying "let me smell your fingers"

I tuned at the time of the 'reveal' to see that angry guy going postal for the first time.

I like that they seem to be kicking off the boring ones first in this programme. That's how you do reality TV. Keep the nutters on board.

so many Officer Club t-shirts...

Gonna watch this. And Episodes. Promising looking TV on last night.

They showed the guys going to a bar/club and one of them kept going "I'm officially single! I'm single now!" and then went off into the loo with a lady.

Yeah. I really like the way they've got rid of the rubbish ones and are keeping the biggest tools in. The angry guy was nuts but I loved it when all the other guys found out he'd "kicked the girls back door in" and they all made him apologise JUST IN CASE he scared their girl.

Lie detector tests next week...I can't wait.

Fame Academy but with bands vying it out to be the ultimate Tool tribute band.

this actually sounds so bad it might be good. Still probably won't watch it as I know I'll just get wound up at how odious these fuckers are, which is the point of the show I suppose. Pure hate TV.

Sounds classic

Monday night at 10pm.

It's up there, and possibly beyond, that show a couple of years ago where the guy was physically sick because his face wasn't symmetrical.

really did look like a lizard!

at least half of them have serious issues. the guy with anger management problems is a genuine psychopath. TERRIFYING.

It's such a good idea. get loads of stupid and or maladjusted people and put them all on tv together, doing group therapy.

The 'gay' one, he's just gay.

I liked the one who was prejudiced against girls from north london.

will be oDing this tonight for sure...

it was something to do with 'true beauty' and was presented by Alexa Chung.

classic show.

more amazing viewing

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEH0ASZ3og4

:D

Bunch of chumps swap their primark tshirts for ninja ant outfits and learn how to platform, to a soundtrack of naff 90s dance music.

so it might not yet be up on 4oD.

I was completely hooked from the start.

The anger one is completely mental but I am also very fond of the one who smoke a lot of weed and talks all slow and is kinda half brain dead already.

that one was good, but the boys were generally nicer than the girls. This one is more evenly matched!

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/tool-academy/4od#3151420

brilliant.

The US version was terrible by comparison.

Expected more. Some of them were COMPLETE tools, others not really. The fact that one of them wasn't enough of a lad but was there supposedly for Britain's Best Lad annoyed me.

Also, the girls are just as bad as the blokes.

The more I read this thread the more I want to watch it, but on the other hand I know I'll hate myself for doing so. Might just go for the middle ground and read the DiS updates.

when they were all pretty gay/vain/arrogant/etc. apart from the angry one who was angry and the stoner one who doesn't know where he is. "Ah'm cluckin' for a joint right about now."

Really good.

The girls were awful. I really liked the dates and that girl who just spent the whole date going "but you don't like that! You don't like that chicken I make you! You won't eat it!"

where they were all sitting in the classroom and the girls were chastising the LADS, and one of the men said to his girlfriend "You keep your fackin' mahf shut" really quietly.

Don't touch a Greek man's car or woman and you'll be alright.

That man needs to fall down more holes.

And when his girlfriend said "What's your nickname?" and he said "Twinkletoes" and she said "That's a gay nickname!" and he said "...I'm not gay..." all dejected and about to give up on life.

And "The manliest thing I've ever done? [extended shitty breakdancing scene] I think breakdancing is quite manly."

'Nah, I wanna sit here and look like a cunt'.

"I aren't never done no cheating on yer!"

He must have been on something before. I think he's quite hot.

[One of the lads is crying]
[really deadpan] "oh look ee's cryyin'....it's cos she's made him look like a dick."

I hate people enough as it is.

"he's got a female friend who he goes round to visit at midnight"
"OH MY GOD THAT IS PROPAAAA. PROPPPPAAA. FAACKED"

I have to watch this now

Best theme tune ever.

It wasn't that good.
But now I can't remember how the original went.

When that girl said he went to see his female friend at quarter to twelve in the morning, I thought "Nothing wrong with that. It's better to see your pals in the morning, then you'll have the whole day ahead to do stuff."

Grab a spot of lunch, all very civilised :)

The presenter guy looked like he was crapping his pants when they all started getting angry about being labelled tools :')

WHAT IS THIS, THEY'RE PROPA MUGGIN US OFF, MAKIN US LOOK LIKE DICKS

when 'vain tool' walked off in a huff because a professional footballer was better at football than him :D

AND

his intro bit where he does a front flip and then falls over but tries to pretend he means it

:'''D

It would be great if he turned round and said, "I'm definitely not gay - I've been pumping you AND this other girl for ages!"

Then did a little victory breakdance. And a cry.

laugh out loud reality TV. Apart from the presenter. Still brilliant though, I'm hooked.

The psychologist actually trying to help these people, and bringing these issues to the fore in a tv series, but visibly cringing as she finishes off her advice with "..here at Tool Academy."

It was the only way I could prove my worth as the ULTIMATE LAD so that I could win this competition. Which, as it all transpires, isn't even a real competition at all, but an intervention to prevent me being a tool because I've been philandering with some other floozey, which I did to become the ULTIMATE LAD... Oh! What a horrible vortex of emotional pain I exist in! I'm torn! I'm on a downward spiral and there's no prevention for my ultimate doom!"

I used to play football with Chris! What a cock!

1. Big Brother Psychologist
2. Tool Academy psychologist
3. Clinical Psychologist
4. Forensic Psychologist
5. Educational Psychologist
6. Health Psychologist
138. Occupational Psychologist

but what the hell is the criteria for expulsion?

His girlfriend seems to have put him in here to make him more of a tool.

their first task whats commitment and the guy who cheated on his bird passed!

the two that got expelled both seemed alright, really..

Hopefully it's one of those rubbish CDs with a recording of an interview of the prog metal band Tool.

the ian wright one was a complete arsecrack.

but the lizard man seemed relatively ok.

The gay one piped up, "Harry, I'm not gay."

Great timing, lad.

My guess would be buying enough of those letters which footballers have on their shirts to put their name on the back of every single item of clothing they own.

"Oh, he's getting a right bitch slap now!"

Twinkletoes to victory!

"Are we allowed to have a touch?"

Tool: "If she wants me to lick her arse I will"

GOLD. Was overlong, and far too many "coming up" and "earlier" montages when you watch it on demand. But yea, excellent. Will definately tune in for the lie detector!!

need to watch this

:'''')

Was entertained and appalled in equal measure.

Twinkletoes' girlfriend is a repulsive human being, he seems like a decent bloke and she is just awful, truly awful.

Quite liked the condescending put-downs from the presenter when they were trying to decide who was to go, ha ha ha.

despite myself, I watched this on catch up the other night as there was absolutely fuck all else on.

Your post sums up pretty much my sentiments... also adding that the girlfriend who went through her boyfriend's phone was teeth-grindingly stupid and shallow. I hope he bins her.

These people quite clearly should not be together yet they're clinging on for dear life even though they're being treated badly, the girlfriends AND the boyfriends.

I think the girls are the types that like the DRAMA.

I can't wait till about halfway through the series when everyone suddenly realises that the girls are the ones who are as equally fucked up and in need of help, the girl who checked her lads phone gave us a brief glimpse of that, heh.

Don't remember names, but she had MASSIVE chebs. But she seemed really articulate and well spoken.

However, the more she went on crying and saying "I JUST WANT YOU TOP BE HAPPY" I thought to myself...'hang on, there's something not quite right'.

Then they showed her pinning a large glass of wine and asking for another and pulling some genuinely frightening faces.

They are all brain damaged.

I found that quite distracting.

I know the one you're talking about though, she looked mental at one point. My girlfriend said, "She looks like she's got really saggy boobs..."

Classic.

I hope there is going to be a big reveal to the girlfriend of the one who was fingering in the toilets. That'll be amazing. Should be next week in the Trust ep i hope

or you'll all be on the next season of Tool Academy.

I know which one you're talking about Darcy. She was pulling some scary faces.

.. why not just ditch them and be single? There was one blonde girl who looked close to tears so much of the time? What's the point in being in a relationship if it makes you so unhappy.

they love the DRAMAZ. That and they get to make their boyfriends and themselves look like complete dickfarts on national TV.

you have to win at awful tasks such as going out on a date with your girlfriend and talk to her!

Not trying to brag, or put myself forward as boyfriend of the year or owt.............but I think I could manage that fairly easily, especially if I stood to win 20 grand!

Though most of the girls on there looked like high-maintenance types who would get annoyed at someone spending 4 nights a week doing band stuff.

Obviously not in content but in terms of utter crapness but still brilliant to watch? If so, I'm totally watching it LIKE NOW.

HOW DO ANY OF THESE PEOPLE GET GIRLFRIENDS?!

They should've all been drowned at birth - the boys and the girls I mean.

The whole show is horrendous but I'll keep watching.

Liam is horrid.

I really don't know! I can't imagine them to be charming or nice AT ALL. They just seem like they would be dicks all the time.

but not for very long. I dumped him as he was a tool.

was pretty great. i like the psychotic greek and his woman couple best

what a bunch of dickheads haha

Some of them seem really dislikable, can't believe a girl with any self esteem would put up with that much.

Cheers for the tip-off Meow.

but the more i think about it, the more uneasy i feel about it. i'm not really sure why.

Woulda watched it through in a so-bad-it's-good way, but QT was on. Plenty of TEH LOLZ & SHABS & BANTS & OMGs & WTFs etc, but I've had my fill so I'm not sure if I can be arsed with it again. Can't imagine how they can turn it into a series worth keeping tabs on (or even a full 1hr+ prog for that matter). Felt a bit like a souped up/drawn out Beadle sketch (mega low budget) crossed with some MTV jobber (draaaaaawn out and multi-repeated clips spelling. out. the. 'plot').

Snog Marry Avoid is still my absolute favourite.

Then eventually thought, 'It's been going for a while now. Some kind of interesting discussion not related to toasters must have broken out.'

:(

it should be called "bitch academy". some of the girls are total pricks.

either that, or "relationship problems academy."

shes a fucking nob.

I don't think Relationship Problems Academy has the same ring to it as Tool Academy does.

crap.

Why the fuck is that guy going out with her. He actually seems like a nice guy who would treat his girlfriend well.

In fact...it really, really fucked me off that she spent the whole time saying the reason she entered him is because he's gay and cries too much and is a mummy's boy. And then when it came to the reveal she pulled out some story about him going round to see a female friend when she finishes work or something. WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKING BITCH. So you're boyfriend is either a "gay pussy-boy" or "true playa for real". WHICH IS IT YOU DISGUSTING CUNT BAG?

The other thing that got me was the way they spoke about their boyfriends when they were doing that cat walk. She was all "gay prick" and it wasn't like she said it in a jokey way, you could tell she meant it and it was horrible.

I literally spit venom at the screen when faced with such horrible specimens.

I really, really hope he dumps her by the end of the series.

"We've actually been playing you all. The girls were the tools of this shows title. While all these men have changed their former ways - gay one's manned up, stoner one's laid off the weed, angry one has stopped killing - the girls continue to be malicious harpies who have revealed themselves as such to the nation. Men, you are now free to dump these disgusting broads and, with the new positive changes to your lives, go forth and find new, less horrendous girlfriends."

The one who looks like a bear (Harry?) is my fave.

The gay one's girlfriend is fucking horrible. He should chuck her off a bridge. I'm surprised he hasn't said "well if you think I'm so gay, why don't you fuck off?"

Can't help but thinking Danny Dyer should be presenting this.

...total shite obv. But watchable.

Favourite line:
'It took a lot of courage for him to go out the house and come back in again'

I do it all the time :0)

http://open.spotify.com/album/5VJuthXU3FydVVRPKxTyEW

How long does it last usually?

I can't wait.

I was telling my friends about it last night, they love shows like this.

a bit like Deadliest Warriors.
We all agreed though that the girls were as bad as the boys.

and necking wine. Think she's the one going out with the one who looks like a bear.

Bunch of Shrieking Harvesters.

My cringe gland is set to stun.

:D

I want to see her slap him or something equally dramatic.

Urgh.

Fuck that, we want them to be wired up to a real lie detector that's wired up to an electric shock machine or a gunge tank or something..

I imagine most of the tools would fall for it.

WOAH! He has kids with someone else?!

She's such a knob.

I was at uni with him, he was in the Footlights. Very good friends with the Inbetweeners I seem to remember. And his name is Luke Roberts, not Robert Lucas - maybe he's scared the tools are going to hunt him down.

not sure why, that made me piss myself. :D

She's such an idiothole.

when they get out? Like that jealous guy saying 'if it comes out I've cheated it'll fuck things up' and Liam being caught on camera cheating. ARE THEY TOTALLY STUPID?

Oh my.

If I ever get like that, you all have permission to punch me.

Gah! It makes me so angry.

Followed by the way he speaks, and then his attitude.

What the actual fuck? He's fucking odious. He's a moron and he looks like a sad cliff. What tragedy happened in her life to give her such low self esteem that she relies on a pricked like him?

This programme is actually putting me off women a little bit.

prison for gbh or he'll get the crap kicked out of him for losing his temper with the wrong person. Tool.

only it's putting me off people a little bit

FOUR MONTHS! Anyone with half a brain would break up if you're arguing and have a load of issues after just four months!

ahahahaha amazing

Why wouldn't they leave someone after such a massive breach of trust? Having a kid is a pretty major thing to keep from a partner..

I thought it'd be OD by now. Bit sad.

hahaaha :D

and the guy presenting constantly takes the piss.

He's got issues

JOE WAS THE NICEST GUY IN THERE

FIX

he was alright

HE ONLY LACKED CONFIDENCE BECAUSE OF HIS BITCH OF A GIRLFRIEND. FUCK.

His was confidence and a whiny cow of a girlfriend, not down to him. So there wasn't much they could do with him.

He needs to ditch her.

Did you see Toni hit Liam? :D

I bet she still doesn't leave him as she said - I really just wanna leave him. I BET SHE WONT, THE TART.

I know that girl wont leave Liam :(

Pete - looks like David Bentley. TOOL.

What a great show!

He totally passed the trust test though... it wasn't a confidence test.

He should still be i with a chance of winning the money imo.

So the guys who refused to take the lie detector test pass for 'trust', yet the guy whose crime is to lack confidence because his girlfriend is an absolute bitch to him has to leave?

Surely a better prize when leaving would be getting to split up with your horrible partner?

100%

then I realised I was overthinking the formatting of Tool Academy.

How the fuck did that bald troglodyte pass and Joe failed?

Actually surprised at how angry I am.

Invest yourself. Commit to it.

I think they're just making it up as they're going along. Surely the ones who stay in are "just tools", ergo having to continue their residence at the academy to stop being tools. Joe should've gone home in the first episode for being so completely un-tooly.

Fuck sake.

Otherwise we'll just have madness and chaos and messy houses.

that the presenter essentially seems to choose who goes out. None of your public voting or shitty celebrity panels on Tool Academy.

They are basically going to keep in the most entertaining Tools for us to laugh at, which can only be a good thing.

(I wish the this button was working)

I shouldn't be this pleased!

I am!

Liam is a massive shitbin.

Did you not see that coming though? Imagine if they just whittled away all the tools to start with and leave all the nice guys. It would be extremely dull. Its complete trash TV....you have to take these things on the chin really.

Basically, you don't even have to do the tasks and you'll get through. Just do a bit of shouting, be a knobface and you'll pass.

Temper Tool = such a little drama queen.

Liam = is the scar on his head to show where they removed his brain and replaced it with a Dirty Berty doll?

We've already had the TV moment of the year.

'Do you have children with another woman?'
'Yes'

Fuckin BANG.

other peoples problem relationships are quite boring.

doesn't it make you realize you're not a tool or a toolette?

She looks a bit like Jordan and I like the way she talks.

:(

its the nutty women and the dickhead men that make me think "eh, i'm not too bad"

If that's your motivation for watching then I find that very sad :(

Oooooohh burn.

But oh boy will it not be the last.

I like it when Tipsy Tool gives us an account of what has happened with all the eloquence of Coleridge on smack

didnt like that bit at the end where presenter bloke told off the guy who was kicked out. i bet he's a perfect boyfriend...

Of course not. It was a joke. Its car crash TV. What other reason would you have for watching this show? Its not for educational purposes, its not because you're hoping the tools will change, its just a crap tv show thats so bad, its good.

Just chained him to a radiator or something.

like stoner tool. He seems nice but he's had too much weed and can't really talk at a normal rate. He seems sweet and wants to marry her and stuff. There are some others who aren't really tools, they're just a bit lazy but thats normal, isn't it?

Horizon confused the shit out of me last night.

like Teabag in Prison Break.

And Joe was lovely!

Becky and Peter- brilliant.

Stoner tool & Mrs Stoner <3

Sex Pest Tool- Indisputable Cunt Tool

That angry guy is angry. "You're lucky that table isn't over your head right now."
Also, what did that shaven-headed guy get angry about when he was trying to leave and was saying "I can't believe you said that on TV and embarrassed me" to his 'girlfriend'?

I'm thinking when Liam's girlfriend *hopefully* sees the footage of him saying "I just fingered her in the toilets"....could be pretty, prettyyyyy awesome.

I was thinking about this. Great big set up?

thats my TV highlight of 2011

For now though, I'll just remember the sound of my jaw crashing to the floor at the parental reveal.

Astounding television. Any not watching Tool Academy is a dong.

He got the massive hump with his girlfriend because basically he's a massive prick who fingered some other girl in the first episode of the show (in a pub toilet no less).

He freaked out because he thought he was gonna get caught out - so turned on his girlfriend saying that she was embarrassing him on national TV etc.

It was all like, "Am I the best girlfriend>" and "Do you love me?" and "Do you have a child with anyone else?" WHOA. WHAT?! SHIT!

http://twitter.com/#!/Jake_TemperTool

I hope so, I really do.

I felt a bit sick before at the thought of the poor girl finding out. But she is a complete plank and I don't care anymore. The more times they show her going "I know my man loves me etc" I just want her to SHUT UP. The editors of this programme need to win an oscar.

huge role reversal in those last two posts!

But then she IS a complete bell herself- seriously, when he was going off at her for saying she wasn't going home ON NATIONAL TELEVISION why was she apologising?!

I love how they try and make their little tantrums legitimate.
I say I love it, it actually terrifies me.
I'm gonna have to 4od this

secret kid tool's girlfriend is like something out of a horror movie

please take one of these blindfolds, put it on and stand over there by that wall.

cheers.

http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276095#r5819923

the guy is an utter, utter prick of the highest order. I'M GREEK, YEAH? SO I HAVE A TEMPER INNIT!

Fuck off pal. Being Greek is not an excuse to have a huge chip on your shoulder.

"Dont bover a greek mans car or woman!" .......Tool.

However you do seem to be hammering home the fact that they're horrible people as a reason for watching the show. I used to watch Big Brother back in the day, mostly cos of the hateful people. I'm bored of that 'reality' shit now though. It's a bit like that Liz Jones article on the lovely girl who is now a thumbnail and how a machine will only accept the correct change but not protect us from murders. Pure car crash trash that's only there to pull in the viewers and make us go - "God that person is awful!"

You and Chintzy are dead to me!

The one with the massive mams who looks like Jordan 2.0 or the blonde one who looks completely drained off all colour?

http://twitter.com/#!/Bita_norooz

the one who is so completely stupid that she doesn't actually even know how to get upset properly.

http://twitter.com/#!/ToolAcademyJade

http://twitter.com/#!/TheTrudgeon

http://twitter.com/#!/KirstyToolette

She even called herself a Toolette! SCENES!

@Jake_TemperTool when is it that I'm supposed to call u gay or a pussy? Cos I want u 2 chin hus when it proves he was lyin

ANTICIPATION!

that the priorities for elimination appear to be those more attractive than the presenter

so cliff face is probably going to win

Becky is just off shopping. http://twitter.com/#!/Becky_TOOLETTE_

Ok, ok. That's my last post in this thread today.

all fake accounts?

That profile picture. Everything about that picture. Her face in that picture. Nearing tears here. The picture.

Not to mention: Fianc'e of Tool Pete. Glamour model, singer and beauty therapist...

Her face in the picture. Fianc'e. PICTURE.

Actually weeping.

I love her.

-Hus and Liam as identical testical-heads.
-The insane expulsion process - if a guy hit his girlfriend then he'd probably be kept in because of his attempts to build trust. a great boyfriend would be out in week one.
-The girlfriend who roundly assassinated the 'gay' one's confidence.
-The fact I have a friend who acts and looks identical to the lie detector guy
-Jake

http://a0.twimg.com/profile_images/1135414494/Pete.x.jpg

Just when I think a programme can't get any better: ALONG COMES TWITTER.

I fucking LOVE the 21st Century.

And that picture *weeps again*

http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276734

Maybe you could join in with the debate about class prejudice. You could add an interesting new angle.

Well I am glad that the only thing I've had said is that I am drained of colour :-)

God bless the internet.

Orrrr have you just filled out your interests?

but i don't want jealous tool to come and find me, especially if he still hangs around with temper tool.

Dunno if you can do that without having access to the twitter account, but if it's been done properly then it's gotta be real.

beckymaslen Becky Maslen
@Becky_TOOLETTE_ I've signed up and put a post on it! Here's the thread about you http://bit.ly/gAGfzM xx

Don't talk to her directly or jealous tool will MURDER you!

and the drinking ability of Tipsy Tool. I'd have a great time.

Where is Liam a bouncer?

I don't think he would murder anyone hahah - he's changed since being in Tool Academy......or has he??

I think delerium has set in.

I love a happy ending.

Dan is on speaking terms with him - I am team Toni!

is that, as a newcomer, Becky has managed to use the reply system properly straightaway. Well done Becky!

Now I'm routing for you guys.

Did you win? It's ok, we won't tell anyone!

In this post: http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276734#r5825369

I'm not sure what he's on about, to be honest. Are you?

loooool xx.

(Only jkin huni.)

Thanks - I was (before Tool Academy) a website admin for Leeds United and they used to have a forum that we would keep checks on. Everyone know how to use the interwebs these days.

Do you still talk to the Toolettes?

Anyway, hope Jealous Tool sorted himself out and has started treating you right!

I talk to a few generally quite a lot - Lyndsey (Massive Tool gf), Kirsty (Stoner Tool gf), Toni (Randy Tool ex-gf) and Jade (Lazy Tool gf) the others I talk to occasionally over twitter or when we have photo days etc...

When the tools are 'evicted' and all the toolettes have to stand and wait for the evictool to appear through the door, did any of you in the second row ever worry about falling off backwards?

http://tiny.cc/cxwd3

:')

Becky and Danny to win!

My name is bamos, I'm crying with laughter, joy and happiness and I have to leave now.

p.s. Happy Birthday

http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4200275#r4936310

"evictool" love it!! No because that was in the class room so the back row had to fit a set of those school chair things in it! Hahaha but someone did fall of the back when it was the reveal - can't remember who its was....maybe Toni?

I thought he looked like the lovechild of Phil Neville and Peter Crouch.

Neville
http://www.evertonfc.com/assets/_files/images/oct_06/efc__1161773558_warm-up.jpg

+

Crouch
http://www2.portsmouthtoday.co.uk/blogs/burtons_banter/uploaded_images/Peter-Crouch-771078.JPG

=

Footballer Tool
http://www.e4.com/images/mb/E4/toolacademy/boys-190/max-190.jpg

but can bamos be wished a happy birthday by every Toolette today? Becky, can you help on this front?

Toni always looked like a 'faller'.

I'm racking up the birthday wishes from the Toolettes. Next stop Bita. Imma take down Temper Tool, just you watch me.

Is the editing representative of what REALLY happens in Tool Academy? Is there lots of sitting round in a classroom listening to that woman who looks a bit like Nobby Solano?

Becky C tweeted about drownedinsound
Chintzy messaged Becky C to wish Bamos a happy birthday
Becky C retweeted a few other things from DiSers
Becky M saw the thread, signed up, started posting
Becky M and Becky C are now watching us
HI GIRLIES.

and you'll be fine.

Becky, I assume this show has already been filmed yonks ago, but you should definitely try and sneak the words 'drowned in sound' into an interview or something. For example, 'Everyone was shocked at the nightclub footage, but to be fair, the film was drowned in sound and it was impossible to make out what might have been said.'

We'll make sure meowington scans all your interviews. It'll probably make a lot of pale, twenty-something, anti-social music geeks very happy.

Oh and HI!

Pssst, automatik - don't talk about people being pale. Becky is drained of colour!

yesterday. They put a tweet "I am going to see if I can get temper tool to loose his temper with me" then about 2 hours later he put "erm well that backfired I am now friends with temper tool".....Dan and me found that pretty funny.

I will definitely say it - don't know if they may edit it out?

And I'm not pale. Chump.

Becky should totes become a regular poster. I think we all need to know what amusing things she's shouted during sex, whether she's any good at haxball, and in what order she rates the Weezer albums.

BURRRRRRRRN!

But this is no time to ruin a perfectly good stereotype.

collision of "real world" and DiS!

Becky - do you like any of the music featured on DiS? If you don't - you don't need to worry too much. We're a mix of elitists, anti-elitists and indifferents on the social board.

Becky Maslen says, "its an awesome website - I am bookmarking it on my laptop!xx" via Twitter.

Whilst Becky Constantinou opines, "Hahha luvvin drownedinsound!! Shout out to u guys!! Xxx" and "awww bless these guys r cute!! Xx"

There will be a new full-time developer on DiS within the month at this rate.

Bet none of editors have smashed a girls back door in.

you're definitely my favourite now.

Did you/the others like TwinkleTool? We didn't think he was a tool at all, we felt sorry for him.

Ima hurt you, D-dawg.

BECKYYYYYYYYY do you know where the Windmill is?

reality TV fan site, we can look back and say this was the day things changed.

In seriousness, Sean, forget about so called "band" takeovers - there is no reason why the two beckys can't do a takeover...

It's a reference to angry tool in the first episode.

As she LOOOVVVEEEEESS Birthday parties! :D

I'd like to know if TwinkleTool is doing okay.

It's ironic that he was the best of the bunch and the least confident.

*meowington disappears through office doors into cloud of dry ice

I think my brother mentioned his band had been reviewed on this website....

and his girlfriend are both doing well. She was made out on the show to be horrible - when really she is lovely. They both have Twitters - @Twinkletool and @F12ABY

Also, what do you think the prospects are for a Jawbreaker reunion?

The public must know!

can't find their review on here, though!

i'll see if the music board can provide any recommendations; brb.

that would be my preferred point of entry.

http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/music/4276757

seriously incredible viewing. Today has been great.

erm.. i have no idea what to make of them. I think they might be fucking brilliant.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiBqaZb09to

i fucking love the music board :D

that is my brothers band - no one really knows what to make of them?? - I like the one about fresh prince of bel air....

actually, i'd love to hear a techno-punk version of this.

i've actually managed to get you some proper recommendations! click on the link up there to the music board thread.

i'm going to have to watch tool academy now to put this very odd day in context :)

what the utter hell is going on? i seem to have missed this years "Showgirls" thread.

that i need get on.

http://www.thetoolacademy.com/

Ask you brother if he likes The Cardiacs, cheers.

i've not watched it yet but I want Becky Maslen to win already.

http://hangout.altsounds.com/reviews/108102-kieronononon-the-primrose-pub-leeds-live.html

I can't find a youtube video of them doing that song - I'll ask him!
And yeah you should watch Tool Academy - I think it's on the 4oD website so you can just stream it.x

What proportion of the chumps/chimps on here would you say are sufficiently toolish enough for academy status?

http://brutaltechnopunk.com/

just out of interest.

and his girlfriend seemed like the most unkind....I know you've said she is lovely, but she did CONSTANTLY call him "gay" and batter his confidence.

Anyways, he's gone so you guys FTW.

I know you can't tell me if you won the competition...but have you come into a large sum of money recently? Say in the region of £25, 000 ;)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pavement_(band) - well it would be the one that sounds like tower of the terror...Terror Twilight! I don't know who this band is but its worth a listen with that name.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jawbreaker_(band) - by the sounds of it one of the band members - Blake - doesn't seem ready enough to be back in the band - maybe they could replace him??

most of them are normal. A fair amount of them are genuinely fit. Becky M looks a bit like meowington and they should probably be friends. The guys are all fucking weird. That's all i've got for my review really.

That is all.

please oh please make it so

but i will try to watch the next episode when it comes out! (and also check out your brother's band)

from the horses mouth

http://twitter.com/#!/F12ABY

I HAVE COLOUR.

you're not black meo.

probably

not only do we have a toolette posting on DiS, but also a toolette's brother.

amazing scenes

do you like Cardiacs?

Your band are mental and remind me of Cardiacs.

They sound like something like my guitarist would love, so yeah I wouldnt be surprised to hear he likes them. TBH, I've just thrown some into my spotify playlist to hear more of them.

someone talk to Angry Tool about Greek women and carts please

Concise and accurate analysis of the likelihood of a reunion though, I fear it will never happen. :(

I miss becky.

make yourself comfortable.

I got an excited text from a mate, apparently he works with one of the tools and his toolette in the admin section of a poorly performaing finance company.
They were kicked off in the first week though, which makes them quite low in the tool heirarchy. Max and Kim, which I think is vain tool? Anyway, apparently his knowledge of power tools is rubbish.

Max and Kim - he is Football Tool. :-) I didn't see much of Max but Kimberley is lovely.

Must suck getting kicked off in the first round.

looked like a lizard! He did look like a lizard, but wasn't that much of a tool. The less toolish are getting kicked off first.

http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276095#r5825905

Britain's Ultimate Lad.

I look forward to welcoming you and your Tool into my lounge this evening. I may actually make a bowl of popcorn for the occasion.

I'm going to celebrate with some out of date aero yoghurts.

CAN'T WAIT.

I'm one of the few whose twitter and username have no link.

I am going for doritos and salsa dip for tonight! Hope you enjoy the show - I'll be sat shaking, hoping I (or Dan) haven't done anything too bad!! I'll check back tomorrow :-)

I've got a feeling today is going to be the first time firearms make an appearance..

AND YOU NEVA TELT ME?

DO YOU HAVE A CHILD WITH ANOTHER WOMAN?

:(

:(

Get to it, or you'll feel like an ill informed chump tomorrow!

but its difficult. I can catch up in work in the morning if I miss anything!

TIME. CHANNEL.

(It's also in HD, but I'd only recommend that for experienced toolwatchers.)

It's like William

Shatner is read

Ing out his lines

From an Auto

Cue that he's never read

Before

I 'ope she wears sumfin fackin nice!

Also, the autocue has been programmed by a drunk horse.

Look but don't touch, yeah?!

BUT HOW THE FUCK DO ANY OF THE GIRLS... MINDBLOWN.

Sad cliff, you wrong'un.

Makes us all look like the most charming bastards in the world.

WHY??? She needs to see that! He's lying his way out of it, the wease.

still the best

whenever I see him I think of that, and the cool runnings joke about drawing a line on someones head so they look like a butt.

but can I just say that Temper Tool's girlfriend was:

a) super filthy hot
b) incredible: "I MISS YOU ALREADY, YOU LITTLE SHIT!"

I was crying with laughter.

I'd better wear something fackin' nice.

I think Scout has just won at Twitter.

You are a steak not a burger! :D

Is this what real people are like?

lol wut?

(Also what Becky M said somewhere..)

IHopefully Maslen can clear that up for us...

I'm scared of the outside world

This programme definitely isn't helping with that

Becky definitely said Toni was his ex-girlfriend. GOOD.

.....Liam and Toni that is!
I think I was quite drained of colour BUT we won the TASK wooooooooo.
Glad Liam and Toni left??

he was beyond redeeming, and she hadn't been with him that long, so it didn't seem worth the effort to fix his toolishness.

Well done your tool on winning the task! I would have liked to have heard longer clips of the songs.

awesome - you can download the mp3s on the E4.com website however you don't see the actual performance which is annoying.

Christ, that's the 'honeymoon period', what would the relationship have been like later on?

Shit, thought they said fourteen. Why would you bother? Christ.

what's the one called who looks a bit like the Lurch character from Hot Fuzz? He made me chuckle.

Nice to put a face to a Drowned In Sound ID as well, Becky Maslen!

Peter's song: brilliant.

I genuinely hope you won it, by far the best couple.

I do have a lot of love for stoner tool, though.

He seems to be really committing to the experience and wants to improve things with his girlfriend. He's a big cuddly bear!

The highlight of my night was scouts tweet.

Can't believe I've only just realised this after it was pointed out to me by somebody else

I kinda think Toni has trust issues and was hoping that would be something it would help her get over.

Unfortunately, she was absolutely right to have trust issues with sad cliff.

Ridiculous! You could never have a good relationship if after four months you're like that.

In fact I don't think I really dislike any of the blokes left in now. I mean, some of them would probably be annoying to hang around with irl, but they've all grown on my a bit - especially as they all seem willing to send themselves up a bit etc.

Hus comes out with some absolutely pearls, Like when he was trying to console Liam a bit, but was just saying things like 'You're lucky you only got hit a couple of times....I'll be honest I felt for the girl....you fackin arshole ahaha'

just wasn't that good. More could have been made of the fingering etc, I wanted LOADS of tears and madness. She didn't seem that arsed in the end, and fair enough she split with him after - but that should have happened on it.

meh, my brief delve into tv like that is now more than likely over.......unless Becky convinces me to stick with it of course!?

A thousand times ^This.

ahh that's who he reminds me of. Hope he says "yarp" at some point.

I'm pretty sure I heard the teaser correctly.
'how can I make it good, up the bum?'. Not sure which toolette this was. I mean, I know this is channel 4, but that's a bit near the mark right?
I'm still going to watch it obvs.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_FitzHigham

How on earth could they think it was a real marriage?
What sort of crazy TV show would say 'yep, you guys have real relationship issues, so we're going to marry you'?

and something along the lines of "you have to tell her about her vagina"

but considering the amount of love it's getting here (and some of the quotes) I'm starting to feel like I should watch this.

Nothing remotely productive about it. But its good trashy, stupid TV.

fidelity.... fidelity....

and the bit where he's asked his girlfriends name and takes about 8 seconds to answer :'D

especially now the best* one has gone.

*best as in the one who will draw in most viewers.

Doesn't seem bad to me at all.

and website :)

I am. Even if Sad cliff is gone.