Tool Academy UK
Best thing on TV this year.
Lots of women send their boyfriends off to compete for the title of ULTIMATE LAD but oh no. They're not really competing for ULTIMATE LAD, their girlfriends all think they're dicks and want to change them.
One girl has been with her boyfriend for four months. If you were with someone for four months and thought they were a dick.....BREAK UP WITH THEM. Anyway, he boyfriend got caught fingering a girl in a toilet. Brilliant stuff.
Anyone else see this/think its amazing?
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Never seen it
but you're not selling it very well.
sorry
Meet the tools?
http://www.e4.com/toolacademy/meetthetools.html
Don't think it's for me
I find it hard to watch those kinds of programs full of horrible hateful cunts, ie. any reality TV show. It's depressing for me to know these people exist.
Glad you're enjoying it though.
Hahaha!
I used to play football with Chris! What a cock!
Never seen it
but you are selling it very well.
I'm gonna put a stop to this before it becomes a 'thing'
OH WAIT
you said something different.
Its probably on 4od...be warned. Its an hour and 45 minutes of pure LAD and some odd bitchy girls. One girl keeps calling her boyfriend gay infront of everyone and then he cries!
AN HOUR AND 45 MINUTES!
Don't think I'd last more than half an hour before I smashed my TV (if I had a TV, that is)
That'll show her he's not gay
Would be much improved
if it was an academy run by the band Tool
Maynard James Twatface standing in his underpants shouting Lateralus lyrics at some Lads whilst they do the washing up
That's what I thought this thread was about before opening
Fame Academy but with bands vying it out to be the ultimate Tool tribute band.
Zool academy
Bunch of chumps swap their primark tshirts for ninja ant outfits and learn how to platform, to a soundtrack of naff 90s dance music.
http://open.spotify.com/album/5VJuthXU3FydVVRPKxTyEW
So, this is pretty much incredible.
best bit?
after the guy "fingered" the girl in the loo, another LAD saying "let me smell your fingers"
Was that in the first half-hour? I missed that, misguidedly watching Episodes.
I tuned at the time of the 'reveal' to see that angry guy going postal for the first time.
I like that they seem to be kicking off the boring ones first in this programme. That's how you do reality TV. Keep the nutters on board.
I think it was in the first bit
They showed the guys going to a bar/club and one of them kept going "I'm officially single! I'm single now!" and then went off into the loo with a lady.
Yeah. I really like the way they've got rid of the rubbish ones and are keeping the biggest tools in. The angry guy was nuts but I loved it when all the other guys found out he'd "kicked the girls back door in" and they all made him apologise JUST IN CASE he scared their girl.
Lie detector tests next week...I can't wait.
the guy who got kicked off
really did look like a lizard!
Finally started watching this
I thought he looked like the lovechild of Phil Neville and Peter Crouch.
Neville
http://www.evertonfc.com/assets/_files/images/oct_06/efc__1161773558_warm-up.jpg
+
Crouch
http://www2.portsmouthtoday.co.uk/blogs/burtons_banter/uploaded_images/Peter-Crouch-771078.JPG
=
Footballer Tool
http://www.e4.com/images/mb/E4/toolacademy/boys-190/max-190.jpg
Seen the adverts
so many Officer Club t-shirts...
Gonna watch this. And Episodes. Promising looking TV on last night.
Actually despite my initial reservations
this actually sounds so bad it might be good. Still probably won't watch it as I know I'll just get wound up at how odious these fuckers are, which is the point of the show I suppose. Pure hate TV.
I knew I could sell it to you Murky.
I'm nearly sold
The more I read this thread the more I want to watch it, but on the other hand I know I'll hate myself for doing so. Might just go for the middle ground and read the DiS updates.
What channel is this on?
Sounds classic
ah E4
E4
Monday night at 10pm.
E4
It's up there, and possibly beyond, that show a couple of years ago where the guy was physically sick because his face wasn't symmetrical.
what was that one called?
it was something to do with 'true beauty' and was presented by Alexa Chung.
Vanity Lair
more amazing viewing
yes, that's the one!
brilliant.
Vanity Lair
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEH0ASZ3og4
:D
lol that was hilarious
i hate those shows but i found that so funny. what an absolute whab.
It's also repeated on Channel 4 next week,
so it might not yet be up on 4oD.
this. is. incredible.
at least half of them have serious issues. the guy with anger management problems is a genuine psychopath. TERRIFYING.
It's such a good idea. get loads of stupid and or maladjusted people and put them all on tv together, doing group therapy.
The 'gay' one, he's just gay.
I liked the one who was prejudiced against girls from north london.
Its brilliant
I was completely hooked from the start.
The anger one is completely mental but I am also very fond of the one who smoke a lot of weed and talks all slow and is kinda half brain dead already.
Also his girlfriend who doesn't seem to really have a face
seen the US version which is amazing too
will be oDing this tonight for sure...
is it the same house they used for beauty and the geek?
classic show.
I'm pretty certain it is
that one was good, but the boys were generally nicer than the girls. This one is more evenly matched!
Now THAT was a great show.
The US version was terrible by comparison.
ENJOY
http://www.channel4.com/programmes/tool-academy/4od#3151420
To be honest, I think this was a bit of a let-down.
Expected more. Some of them were COMPLETE tools, others not really. The fact that one of them wasn't enough of a lad but was there supposedly for Britain's Best Lad annoyed me.
Also, the girls are just as bad as the blokes.
I'm hoping next week will be a bit juicy with the lie detector tests
The girls were awful. I really liked the dates and that girl who just spent the whole date going "but you don't like that! You don't like that chicken I make you! You won't eat it!"
I like that there was the gay one, the vain one, the arrogant one, etc.
when they were all pretty gay/vain/arrogant/etc. apart from the angry one who was angry and the stoner one who doesn't know where he is. "Ah'm cluckin' for a joint right about now."
Really good.
I also really liked that moment
where they were all sitting in the classroom and the girls were chastising the LADS, and one of the men said to his girlfriend "You keep your fackin' mahf shut" really quietly.
And the gay one's cryface.
And when his girlfriend said "What's your nickname?" and he said "Twinkletoes" and she said "That's a gay nickname!" and he said "...I'm not gay..." all dejected and about to give up on life.
And "The manliest thing I've ever done? [extended shitty breakdancing scene] I think breakdancing is quite manly."
I really recognise the gay one
He must have been on something before. I think he's quite hot.
Maybe he was on Playing It Straight?
I'd forgotten about Playing It Straight.
Best theme tune ever.
I wrote an alternative theme tune for 'Playing it Straight'
It wasn't that good.
But now I can't remember how the original went.
Mariachi bands are great.
He looks a bit like farmer boy from Junior Apprentice
They say
Don't touch a Greek man's car or woman and you'll be alright.
That man needs to fall down more holes.
'Do you wanna go outside?'
'Nah, I wanna sit here and look like a cunt'.
also a big fan of the subtitling.
"I aren't never done no cheating on yer!"
Best moment
[One of the lads is crying]
[really deadpan] "oh look ee's cryyin'....it's cos she's made him look like a dick."
that's it
I have to watch this now
I don't think I should watch this show.
I hate people enough as it is.
"aaaah he's crying. probably cos she made him look like a dick, that's why"
"he's got a female friend who he goes round to visit at midnight"
"OH MY GOD THAT IS PROPAAAA. PROPPPPAAA. FAACKED"
i can also never get enough of the phrase "ah mate they're just fucking mugging us off"
I don't think i've heard the word "fucked" so much
Oh.
When that girl said he went to see his female friend at quarter to twelve in the morning, I thought "Nothing wrong with that. It's better to see your pals in the morning, then you'll have the whole day ahead to do stuff."
Yeah, I thought she meant 11.45am
Grab a spot of lunch, all very civilised :)
It's too early for adultery at that time.
Indeed
It would be great if he turned round and said, "I'm definitely not gay - I've been pumping you AND this other girl for ages!"
Then did a little victory breakdance. And a cry.
"I'm sorry, baby.
It was the only way I could prove my worth as the ULTIMATE LAD so that I could win this competition. Which, as it all transpires, isn't even a real competition at all, but an intervention to prevent me being a tool because I've been philandering with some other floozey, which I did to become the ULTIMATE LAD... Oh! What a horrible vortex of emotional pain I exist in! I'm torn! I'm on a downward spiral and there's no prevention for my ultimate doom!"
"DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"someone who goes to councilling is a mental cunt"
"and I'm not fackin' mental"
"I'm greek"
I wonder if they'll up their security at the house by the next episode
The presenter guy looked like he was crapping his pants when they all started getting angry about being labelled tools :')
WHAT IS THIS, THEY'RE PROPA MUGGIN US OFF, MAKIN US LOOK LIKE DICKS
also
when 'vain tool' walked off in a huff because a professional footballer was better at football than him :D
AND
his intro bit where he does a front flip and then falls over but tries to pretend he means it
:'''D
Vain Tool was then shown having the hump with a nail file!
:'D
Absolutely brilliant
laugh out loud reality TV. Apart from the presenter. Still brilliant though, I'm hooked.
the only good thing he said was that the guy looked like a lizard.
Also ALSO
The psychologist actually trying to help these people, and bringing these issues to the fore in a tv series, but visibly cringing as she finishes off her advice with "..here at Tool Academy."
there's nothing so important as ethics to a psychologist.
Frasier taught me.
he was a psychiatrist
Top Psychologists
1. Big Brother Psychologist
2. Tool Academy psychologist
3. Clinical Psychologist
4. Forensic Psychologist
5. Educational Psychologist
6. Health Psychologist
138. Occupational Psychologist
I'm going to have to watch this now because it sounds hilariously bad.
4OD's a bit shit isn't it?
it's not really important
but what the hell is the criteria for expulsion?
Not being mental.
I don't think it matters really
their first task whats commitment and the guy who cheated on his bird passed!
It's like they're keeping the more tool-ish tools in, so that the winner is the ULTIMATE TOOL
the two that got expelled both seemed alright, really..
So what does the ULTIMATE TOOL win?
Hopefully it's one of those rubbish CDs with a recording of an interview of the prog metal band Tool.
Like £25,000!
Imagine what they'd spend it on though!
My guess would be buying enough of those letters which footballers have on their shirts to put their name on the back of every single item of clothing they own.
no way
the ian wright one was a complete arsecrack.
but the lizard man seemed relatively ok.
Poor Twinkle Tool
His girlfriend seems to have put him in here to make him more of a tool.
"Jake smashed the girls' back doors in."
My favourite bit was after the Geezer Tool's woman walked out, and he was eventually going to follow her
The gay one piped up, "Harry, I'm not gay."
Great timing, lad.
Or at the club...
"Are we allowed to have a touch?"
This show is golden
"Oh, he's getting a right bitch slap now!"
Twinkletoes to victory!
Girl: "To be sexually expressive takes a lot of effort" (think that's what she said anyway!)
Tool: "If she wants me to lick her arse I will"
GOLD. Was overlong, and far too many "coming up" and "earlier" montages when you watch it on demand. But yea, excellent. Will definately tune in for the lie detector!!
I thought that's what he said, but I honestly couldn't believe my ears
:'''')
need to watch this
watched this last night
Was entertained and appalled in equal measure.
Twinkletoes' girlfriend is a repulsive human being, he seems like a decent bloke and she is just awful, truly awful.
Quite liked the condescending put-downs from the presenter when they were trying to decide who was to go, ha ha ha.
^
despite myself, I watched this on catch up the other night as there was absolutely fuck all else on.
Your post sums up pretty much my sentiments... also adding that the girlfriend who went through her boyfriend's phone was teeth-grindingly stupid and shallow. I hope he bins her.
Its just mad
These people quite clearly should not be together yet they're clinging on for dear life even though they're being treated badly, the girlfriends AND the boyfriends.
I think the girls are the types that like the DRAMA.
definitely shouldn't be together
I can't wait till about halfway through the series when everyone suddenly realises that the girls are the ones who are as equally fucked up and in need of help, the girl who checked her lads phone gave us a brief glimpse of that, heh.
I thought one of them was normal....
Don't remember names, but she had MASSIVE chebs. But she seemed really articulate and well spoken.
However, the more she went on crying and saying "I JUST WANT YOU TOP BE HAPPY" I thought to myself...'hang on, there's something not quite right'.
Then they showed her pinning a large glass of wine and asking for another and pulling some genuinely frightening faces.
They are all brain damaged.
A lot of them had massive chebs didn't they?
I found that quite distracting.
I know the one you're talking about though, she looked mental at one point. My girlfriend said, "She looks like she's got really saggy boobs..."
Classic.
the chebs were another definate highlight
I hope there is going to be a big reveal to the girlfriend of the one who was fingering in the toilets. That'll be amazing. Should be next week in the Trust ep i hope
Stop talking about the chebs, guys
or you'll all be on the next season of Tool Academy.
I know which one you're talking about Darcy. She was pulling some scary faces.
i'd love to go on. To win 20 grand,
you have to win at awful tasks such as going out on a date with your girlfriend and talk to her!
Not trying to brag, or put myself forward as boyfriend of the year or owt.............but I think I could manage that fairly easily, especially if I stood to win 20 grand!
Ha, likewise. Compared to those goons I felt like a competent boyfriend.
Though most of the girls on there looked like high-maintenance types who would get annoyed at someone spending 4 nights a week doing band stuff.
I've been out with a Stoner Tool before
but not for very long. I dumped him as he was a tool.
If your bf was such a tool they'd have to enrol on 'tool academy'...
.. why not just ditch them and be single? There was one blonde girl who looked close to tears so much of the time? What's the point in being in a relationship if it makes you so unhappy.
As someone pointed out somewhere up there ^^^
they love the DRAMAZ. That and they get to make their boyfriends and themselves look like complete dickfarts on national TV.
Is this similar to Don't Tell the Bride
Obviously not in content but in terms of utter crapness but still brilliant to watch? If so, I'm totally watching it LIKE NOW.
Ok, I'm watching this now
HOW DO ANY OF THESE PEOPLE GET GIRLFRIENDS?!
HOW DO THOSE GIRLS GET BOYFRIENDS?
They should've all been drowned at birth - the boys and the girls I mean.
Yeah, they're pretty bad too
The whole show is horrendous but I'll keep watching.
Liam is horrid.
:D
I really don't know! I can't imagine them to be charming or nice AT ALL. They just seem like they would be dicks all the time.
A couple of them don't seem too bad compared to the others.
Some of them seem really dislikable, can't believe a girl with any self esteem would put up with that much.
i watched this
was pretty great. i like the psychotic greek and his woman couple best
also they were genuinely there for britain's ultimate lad
what a bunch of dickheads haha
I have to watch this it sounds amazing.
Cheers for the tip-off Meow.
Enjoy!
i watched this the other day and had a good laugh
but the more i think about it, the more uneasy i feel about it. i'm not really sure why.
Just watched it earlier and got as far as the reveal.
Woulda watched it through in a so-bad-it's-good way, but QT was on. Plenty of TEH LOLZ & SHABS & BANTS & OMGs & WTFs etc, but I've had my fill so I'm not sure if I can be arsed with it again. Can't imagine how they can turn it into a series worth keeping tabs on (or even a full 1hr+ prog for that matter). Felt a bit like a souped up/drawn out Beadle sketch (mega low budget) crossed with some MTV jobber (draaaaaawn out and multi-repeated clips spelling. out. the. 'plot').
Snog Marry Avoid is still my absolute favourite.
I kept ignoring this thread
Then eventually thought, 'It's been going for a while now. Some kind of interesting discussion not related to toasters must have broken out.'
:(
ok, watched it.
it should be called "bitch academy". some of the girls are total pricks.
either that, or "relationship problems academy."
the worst one was the slag that keeps calling her boyfriend "gay" in front of everyone.
shes a fucking nob.
I'm glad you watched it
I don't think Relationship Problems Academy has the same ring to it as Tool Academy does.
"my boyfriends a tool because the spark has gone in our relationship"
crap.
Yeah but its probably because he's banging other girls.
Absolutely.
Why the fuck is that guy going out with her. He actually seems like a nice guy who would treat his girlfriend well.
In fact...it really, really fucked me off that she spent the whole time saying the reason she entered him is because he's gay and cries too much and is a mummy's boy. And then when it came to the reveal she pulled out some story about him going round to see a female friend when she finishes work or something. WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKING BITCH. So you're boyfriend is either a "gay pussy-boy" or "true playa for real". WHICH IS IT YOU DISGUSTING CUNT BAG?
gosh, you're really getting into this.
The other thing that got me was the way they spoke about their boyfriends when they were doing that cat walk. She was all "gay prick" and it wasn't like she said it in a jokey way, you could tell she meant it and it was horrible.
This is why I shouldn't watch shows like this...
I literally spit venom at the screen when faced with such horrible specimens.
I really, really hope he dumps her by the end of the series.
Wouldn't it be great if at the end, the presenter said,
"We've actually been playing you all. The girls were the tools of this shows title. While all these men have changed their former ways - gay one's manned up, stoner one's laid off the weed, angry one has stopped killing - the girls continue to be malicious harpies who have revealed themselves as such to the nation. Men, you are now free to dump these disgusting broads and, with the new positive changes to your lives, go forth and find new, less horrendous girlfriends."
:-D
Watched this last night, good stuff.
The one who looks like a bear (Harry?) is my fave.
The gay one's girlfriend is fucking horrible. He should chuck her off a bridge. I'm surprised he hasn't said "well if you think I'm so gay, why don't you fuck off?"
Can't help but thinking Danny Dyer should be presenting this.
But he would've walked off when he found out it wasn't actually
Britain's Ultimate Lad.
Finally watched this, this morning...
...total shite obv. But watchable.
Favourite line:
'It took a lot of courage for him to go out the house and come back in again'
I do it all the time :0)
Tonight - E4 - 10pm
Yesss
How long does it last usually?
Only an hour
I can't wait.
Excellent
I was telling my friends about it last night, they love shows like this.
We were talking about it on Saturday, I think it's terribleness may give it cult status
a bit like Deadliest Warriors.
We all agreed though that the girls were as bad as the boys.
agreed - some of them are quite scary, especially the one who kept crying
and necking wine. Think she's the one going out with the one who looks like a bear.
Bunch of Shrieking Harvesters.
15 MINUTES
Bring it on.
My cringe gland is set to stun.
eeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkk!!!
:D
I hope Jamie gets busted for fingering that girl now
me too
I want to see her slap him or something equally dramatic.
That is going to be painful viewing
Becky, Pete's girlfriend.
Urgh.
What? Not even a real lie detector? Boooo!
Fuck that, we want them to be wired up to a real lie detector that's wired up to an electric shock machine or a gunge tank or something..
They should do them on a photo-copier like in The Wire.
Strangely enough, that's what I was thinking of.
I imagine most of the tools would fall for it.
Mrs. Twinkle Tool is a massive fucking bitch and I think she realises it.
Jeeze. Her saying he needs to man up when she undermines him..
She's such a knob.
Why the fuck was she crying so much?
She's such an idiothole.
Because she realised she's the big wanky tool instead of him.
.
WOAH! He has kids with someone else?!
How could you not tell someone that??
I know the lie detector guy.
I was at uni with him, he was in the Footlights. Very good friends with the Inbetweeners I seem to remember. And his name is Luke Roberts, not Robert Lucas - maybe he's scared the tools are going to hunt him down.
maybe he's scared the tools are going to hunt him down.
not sure why, that made me piss myself. :D
Do these people not realise they can watch all this back on TV
when they get out? Like that jealous guy saying 'if it comes out I've cheated it'll fuck things up' and Liam being caught on camera cheating. ARE THEY TOTALLY STUPID?
AND ALL THE GIRLS LAUGHING AND SAYING THEY WONT LEAVE THEM ANYWAY
Gah! It makes me so angry.
It's absolute madness.
Why wouldn't they leave someone after such a massive breach of trust? Having a kid is a pretty major thing to keep from a partner..
These girls.
Oh my.
If I ever get like that, you all have permission to punch me.
they're all toolettes!
They most certainly are.
*toilets
The thing I hate most about Temper Tool is his wardrobe.
Followed by the way he speaks, and then his attitude.
I reckon one of two things will happen to him in life...
prison for gbh or he'll get the crap kicked out of him for losing his temper with the wrong person. Tool.
What the fuck does Toni see in Liam?
What the actual fuck? He's fucking odious. He's a moron and he looks like a sad cliff. What tragedy happened in her life to give her such low self esteem that she relies on a pricked like him?
This programme is actually putting me off women a little bit.
^ this
only it's putting me off people a little bit
^
They've only been together 4 months!
FOUR MONTHS! Anyone with half a brain would break up if you're arguing and have a load of issues after just four months!
he looks like a sad cliff?!
ahahahaha amazing
^this
hahaaha :D
Maybe she's attracted to head disfigurations on shaven-headed men?
Ohhhhhh
I thought it'd be OD by now. Bit sad.
I love how the psychologist takes it really seriously
and the guy presenting constantly takes the piss.
is he not just a tool still?
He's got issues
this website is hating on quote marks today.
DANNY DIDN'T EVEN TAKE THE LIE DETECTOR TEST
JOE WAS THE NICEST GUY IN THERE
FIX
I feel quite sad.
HE WASNT A FUCKING TOOL
TOOL!
literally no clue what constitutes winning in this
he was alright
yeah, I think it's the ones who don't really have that many issues
His was confidence and a whiny cow of a girlfriend, not down to him. So there wasn't much they could do with him.
He needs to ditch her.
Hmmmm
He totally passed the trust test though... it wasn't a confidence test.
He should still be i with a chance of winning the money imo.
the metro speculated this morning
that the priorities for elimination appear to be those more attractive than the presenter
so cliff face is probably going to win
BULLSHIT
HE ONLY LACKED CONFIDENCE BECAUSE OF HIS BITCH OF A GIRLFRIEND. FUCK.
He should've asked her "Do I want to leave here with you? Don't be stupid, idiot."
OMG
Did you see Toni hit Liam? :D
I bet she still doesn't leave him as she said - I really just wanna leave him. I BET SHE WONT, THE TART.
I want to see next weeks now, but the wedding thing is a bit creepy.
I know that girl wont leave Liam :(
Joe - nicest guy ever.
Pete - looks like David Bentley. TOOL.
What a great show!
Is anyone else confused about the format? It seems a bit flawed....
So the guys who refused to take the lie detector test pass for 'trust', yet the guy whose crime is to lack confidence because his girlfriend is an absolute bitch to him has to leave?
Surely a better prize when leaving would be getting to split up with your horrible partner?
^
100%
I thought this
then I realised I was overthinking the formatting of Tool Academy.
:D
Invest yourself. Commit to it.
I like the fact
that the presenter essentially seems to choose who goes out. None of your public voting or shitty celebrity panels on Tool Academy.
Yeah
They are basically going to keep in the most entertaining Tools for us to laugh at, which can only be a good thing.
I like this too
(I wish the this button was working)
HOW DID YOU DO THAT?
:D
This is SRS BSNSS!
WELL IF E4 IS NOT GOING TO SOMEONE MUST.
Otherwise we'll just have madness and chaos and messy houses.
Most definitely.
I think they're just making it up as they're going along. Surely the ones who stay in are "just tools", ergo having to continue their residence at the academy to stop being tools. Joe should've gone home in the first episode for being so completely un-tooly.
Fuck sake.
He was the most honest one in there, what the fuck are they talking about
How the fuck did that bald troglodyte pass and Joe failed?
Actually surprised at how angry I am.
Yeah....the format is completely flawed.
Did you not see that coming though? Imagine if they just whittled away all the tools to start with and leave all the nice guys. It would be extremely dull. Its complete trash TV....you have to take these things on the chin really.
It's on OD!
I shouldn't be this pleased!
I am!
Oh I just love Joe.
Liam is a massive shitbin.
Don't really get that.
Basically, you don't even have to do the tasks and you'll get through. Just do a bit of shouting, be a knobface and you'll pass.
Temper Tool = such a little drama queen.
Liam = is the scar on his head to show where they removed his brain and replaced it with a Dirty Berty doll?
Close the voting, shut down the nominations lists, go to sleep for another 340odd days.
We've already had the TV moment of the year.
'Do you have children with another woman?'
'Yes'
Fuckin BANG.
I dunno B-man
I'm thinking when Liam's girlfriend *hopefully* sees the footage of him saying "I just fingered her in the toilets"....could be pretty, prettyyyyy awesome.
Hi Darcy!
I was thinking about this. Great big set up?
Hi Chintzy!
I hope so, I really do.
I felt a bit sick before at the thought of the poor girl finding out. But she is a complete plank and I don't care anymore. The more times they show her going "I know my man loves me etc" I just want her to SHUT UP. The editors of this programme need to win an oscar.
I still feel sorry for her
But then she IS a complete bell herself- seriously, when he was going off at her for saying she wasn't going home ON NATIONAL TELEVISION why was she apologising?!
I liked it when the other guy asked to smell his fingers
thats my TV highlight of 2011
:'D
^this
I await that eagerly.
For now though, I'll just remember the sound of my jaw crashing to the floor at the parental reveal.
Astounding television. Any not watching Tool Academy is a dong.
Yeah I was actually slack jawed at that revelation...
It was all like, "Am I the best girlfriend>" and "Do you love me?" and "Do you have a child with anyone else?" WHOA. WHAT?! SHIT!
probably seen enough of this show now.
other peoples problem relationships are quite boring.
^ massively not this
yeah but doesn't it make you feel good about yourself?
doesn't it make you realize you're not a tool or a toolette?
other people arguing surely doenst make anyone happy does it?
Its not the arguing that makes me happy
its the nutty women and the dickhead men that make me think "eh, i'm not too bad"
fair enough.
didnt like that bit at the end where presenter bloke told off the guy who was kicked out. i bet he's a perfect boyfriend...
I do feel a bit sorry for some of them
like stoner tool. He seems nice but he's had too much weed and can't really talk at a normal rate. He seems sweet and wants to marry her and stuff. There are some others who aren't really tools, they're just a bit lazy but thats normal, isn't it?
welcome to reality.
don't talk to me about reality
Horizon confused the shit out of me last night.
and the subject was?
what is reality?
^
huge role reversal in those last two posts!
Hus seems a nice chap
And Joe was lovely!
Becky and Peter- brilliant.
Stoner tool & Mrs Stoner <3
Sex Pest Tool- Indisputable Cunt Tool
I think you forgot who you are talking to
:(
Are you suggesting he's a tool?
Oooooohh burn.
I know I'm not a tool without having to watch a program full of them
If that's your motivation for watching then I find that very sad :(
Oh my goodness.
Of course not. It was a joke. Its car crash TV. What other reason would you have for watching this show? Its not for educational purposes, its not because you're hoping the tools will change, its just a crap tv show thats so bad, its good.
Haha, I'm just winding you up mostly
However you do seem to be hammering home the fact that they're horrible people as a reason for watching the show. I used to watch Big Brother back in the day, mostly cos of the hateful people. I'm bored of that 'reality' shit now though. It's a bit like that Liz Jones article on the lovely girl who is now a thumbnail and how a machine will only accept the correct change but not protect us from murders. Pure car crash trash that's only there to pull in the viewers and make us go - "God that person is awful!"
They shouldn't have let angry tool leave
Just chained him to a radiator or something.
He probably would have chopped his own hand off
like Teabag in Prison Break.
I think Becky is my favourite one
She looks a bit like Jordan and I like the way she talks.
New to tool academy last night
But oh boy will it not be the last.
I like it when Tipsy Tool gives us an account of what has happened with all the eloquence of Coleridge on smack
I caught about 15mins of this.
That angry guy is angry. "You're lucky that table isn't over your head right now."
Also, what did that shaven-headed guy get angry about when he was trying to leave and was saying "I can't believe you said that on TV and embarrassed me" to his 'girlfriend'?
All the guys had to take a lie detector test.
He got the massive hump with his girlfriend because basically he's a massive prick who fingered some other girl in the first episode of the show (in a pub toilet no less).
He freaked out because he thought he was gonna get caught out - so turned on his girlfriend saying that she was embarrassing him on national TV etc.
excellent stuff
I love how they try and make their little tantrums legitimate.
I say I love it, it actually terrifies me.
I'm gonna have to 4od this
Temper Tool's on Twitter
http://twitter.com/#!/Jake_TemperTool
AHAHAHA
whats with all the numbers?
I'm actually a nice guy lol
^
the guy is an utter, utter prick of the highest order. I'M GREEK, YEAH? SO I HAVE A TEMPER INNIT!
Fuck off pal. Being Greek is not an excuse to have a huge chip on your shoulder.
"Dont bover a greek mans car or woman!" .......Tool.
Excellent.
And his woman
http://twitter.com/#!/Bita_norooz
And Jade
http://twitter.com/#!/ToolAcademyJade
And David
http://twitter.com/#!/TheTrudgeon
And Kirsty
http://twitter.com/#!/KirstyToolette
She even called herself a Toolette! SCENES!
Aren't these
all fake accounts?
how many times can people write "lol" in one day?
@Jake_TemperTool when is it that I'm supposed to call u gay or a pussy? Cos I want u 2 chin hus when it proves he was lyin
I want to know why he and Karen are in The Sun on Friday!!
ANTICIPATION!
glad we got confirmation that at least a few of the girls are far bigger tools than most of the men
secret kid tool's girlfriend is like something out of a horror movie
Anyone who likes Becky...
please take one of these blindfolds, put it on and stand over there by that wall.
cheers.
:'(
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276095#r5819923
I know!
You and Chintzy are dead to me!
which becky?
The one with the massive mams who looks like Jordan 2.0 or the blonde one who looks completely drained off all colour?
Pete's Becky...
the one who is so completely stupid that she doesn't actually even know how to get upset properly.
Guys!
Becky is just off shopping. http://twitter.com/#!/Becky_TOOLETTE_
Ok, ok. That's my last post in this thread today.
Hahahahahahahaha
That profile picture. Everything about that picture. Her face in that picture. Nearing tears here. The picture.
Not to mention: Fianc'e of Tool Pete. Glamour model, singer and beauty therapist...
Her face in the picture. Fianc'e. PICTURE.
Actually weeping.
:''''D
I love her.
Look at her Fianc'e
http://a0.twimg.com/profile_images/1135414494/Pete.x.jpg
He's in the loo!
Oh. My. Word.
Just when I think a programme can't get any better: ALONG COMES TWITTER.
I fucking LOVE the 21st Century.
And that picture *weeps again*
This is all kinds of good
-Hus and Liam as identical testical-heads.
-The insane expulsion process - if a guy hit his girlfriend then he'd probably be kept in because of his attempts to build trust. a great boyfriend would be out in week one.
-The girlfriend who roundly assassinated the 'gay' one's confidence.
-The fact I have a friend who acts and looks identical to the lie detector guy
-Jake
Becky, if you're still reading this, you might want to look at this thread too
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276734
Maybe you could join in with the debate about class prejudice. You could add an interesting new angle.
Wowzers
Well I am glad that the only thing I've had said is that I am drained of colour :-)
:D
:D :D :D
God bless the internet.
she looks like my ex girlfriends sister.
I look like your ex girlfriends sister?
exactly.
meths!
Don't talk to her directly or jealous tool will MURDER you!
Hahah
I don't think he would murder anyone hahah - he's changed since being in Tool Academy......or has he??
I hope so.
I love a happy ending.
:''''')
I wanted Joe to win...
Now I'm routing for you guys.
Did you win? It's ok, we won't tell anyone!
Laughing hard at this
I think delerium has set in.
Still....BEST DAY EVER
I would've said that you're my favourite
but i don't want jealous tool to come and find me, especially if he still hangs around with temper tool.
:D
Imagine if they could combine, power-rangers style, to form Multi-Tool..
I would take the smoking ability of Stoner Tool
and the drinking ability of Tipsy Tool. I'd have a great time.
Amazing scenes.
Hi CG!
Not just me, then?!
Twitter's been linked
Dunno if you can do that without having access to the twitter account, but if it's been done properly then it's gotta be real.
Have any of your family ever worked in a shoe factory?
Who said that their family worked in a shoe factory??
An angry user in the other Tool Academy thread on here.
In this post: http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276734#r5825369
I'm not sure what he's on about, to be honest. Are you?
:D
Were you already on DiS?
Orrrr have you just filled out your interests?
Its genuinely her!
beckymaslen Becky Maslen
@Becky_TOOLETTE_ I've signed up and put a post on it! Here's the thread about you http://bit.ly/gAGfzM xx
Oh, I've got a question!
Where is Liam a bouncer?
Club toilets
Somewhere around Manchester
Dan is on speaking terms with him - I am team Toni!
Mt Rushmore?
fix. loooooool. xx.
E4SMASH
My favourite part of all this
is that, as a newcomer, Becky has managed to use the reply system properly straightaway. Well done Becky!
Toolette > marylin
loooool xx.
(Only jkin huni.)
:-)
Thanks - I was (before Tool Academy) a website admin for Leeds United and they used to have a forum that we would keep checks on. Everyone know how to use the interwebs these days.
Hey Becky,
Do you still talk to the Toolettes?
hmm....
I talk to a few generally quite a lot - Lyndsey (Massive Tool gf), Kirsty (Stoner Tool gf), Toni (Randy Tool ex-gf) and Jade (Lazy Tool gf) the others I talk to occasionally over twitter or when we have photo days etc...
In my head that question sounds like you're interviewing Diana Ross after the Supremes split up.
hahahahah
:D
You'd think so, wouldn't you
Anyway, hope Jealous Tool sorted himself out and has started treating you right!
Hi Becky!
When the tools are 'evicted' and all the toolettes have to stand and wait for the evictool to appear through the door, did any of you in the second row ever worry about falling off backwards?
:D
The point at which my birthday peaked: the word 'evictool'.
My name is bamos, I'm crying with laughter, joy and happiness and I have to leave now.
Glad to be of service!
p.s. Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday!
That's two now
but can bamos be wished a happy birthday by every Toolette today? Becky, can you help on this front?
Thanks Becky M!
I'm racking up the birthday wishes from the Toolettes. Next stop Bita. Imma take down Temper Tool, just you watch me.
don't touch his woman or his car
and you'll be fine.
I think someone tried doing that on Twitter...
yesterday. They put a tweet "I am going to see if I can get temper tool to loose his temper with me" then about 2 hours later he put "erm well that backfired I am now friends with temper tool".....Dan and me found that pretty funny.
hahahaha
"evictool" love it!! No because that was in the class room so the back row had to fit a set of those school chair things in it! Hahaha but someone did fall of the back when it was the reveal - can't remember who its was....maybe Toni?
I knew it!
Toni always looked like a 'faller'.
Maybe that will make its way onto the 'out-takes'.
Is the editing representative of what REALLY happens in Tool Academy? Is there lots of sitting round in a classroom listening to that woman who looks a bit like Nobby Solano?
This thread just went to another level
.
http://tiny.cc/cxwd3
:')
Becky and Danny to win!
Oh wow
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4200275#r4936310
I wunder what happened to Josh's soopaband. loooool xx.
what the fuck is going on in here?
DAD IS HOME! QUICK, HIDE THE TOP-SHELF!
:D
:D
Becky C saw the thread
Becky C tweeted about drownedinsound
Chintzy messaged Becky C to wish Bamos a happy birthday
Becky C retweeted a few other things from DiSers
Becky M saw the thread, signed up, started posting
Becky M and Becky C are now watching us
HI GIRLIES.
bye.
I think it's worth reiterating: incredible scenes.
Becky, I assume this show has already been filmed yonks ago, but you should definitely try and sneak the words 'drowned in sound' into an interview or something. For example, 'Everyone was shocked at the nightclub footage, but to be fair, the film was drowned in sound and it was impossible to make out what might have been said.'
We'll make sure meowington scans all your interviews. It'll probably make a lot of pale, twenty-something, anti-social music geeks very happy.
Oh and HI!
^ so much this.
Pssst, automatik - don't talk about people being pale. Becky is drained of colour!
No wonder she seems to fit in so well!
Becky should totes become a regular poster. I think we all need to know what amusing things she's shouted during sex, whether she's any good at haxball, and in what order she rates the Weezer albums.
When we next go for interviews...
I will definitely say it - don't know if they may edit it out?
You're my new favourite, Becky.
:-D
Excellent.
I think we could be friends Becky M.
hi Becky
you're definitely my favourite now.
Did you/the others like TwinkleTool? We didn't think he was a tool at all, we felt sorry for him.
Good question!
I'd like to know if TwinkleTool is doing okay.
It's ironic that he was the best of the bunch and the least confident.
Twinkle Tool
and his girlfriend are both doing well. She was made out on the show to be horrible - when really she is lovely. They both have Twitters - @Twinkletool and @F12ABY
^thisthisthisthis
And I'm not pale. Chump.
You are under all that fake tan!
BURRRRRRRRN!
If this is a threadsmash
Ima hurt you, D-dawg.
IT WAS.
BECKYYYYYYYYY do you know where the Windmill is?
she said she wants to come!
As she LOOOVVVEEEEESS Birthday parties! :D
And I'm not anti-social
But this is no time to ruin a perfectly good stereotype.
Me too.
^This
Previous "celeb" appearances on DiS have been pretty understandable (editors, los camp etc) but this has to be the strangest
collision of "real world" and DiS!
Becky - do you like any of the music featured on DiS? If you don't - you don't need to worry too much. We're a mix of elitists, anti-elitists and indifferents on the social board.
*best collision of 'real world' and DiS.
Bet none of editors have smashed a girls back door in.
this is barely a euphemism
Euphemism?
It's a reference to angry tool in the first episode.
ahhhh
To be fair, if I was the one doing Edith Bowman...
that would be my preferred point of entry.
Kieronononon
I think my brother mentioned his band had been reviewed on this website....
Google describes them as "brutal techno punk"
can't find their review on here, though!
i'll see if the music board can provide any recommendations; brb.
.
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/music/4276757
we have a few replies
i fucking love the music board :D
Not sure how techno they are..
erm.. i have no idea what to make of them. I think they might be fucking brilliant.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiBqaZb09to
Yep Brutal Techno Punk....
that is my brothers band - no one really knows what to make of them?? - I like the one about fresh prince of bel air....
You should go on the music board and see what people think
they didn't re-record the theme to the fresh prince did they?!
actually, i'd love to hear a techno-punk version of this.
i've actually managed to get you some proper recommendations! click on the link up there to the music board thread.
i'm going to have to watch tool academy now to put this very odd day in context :)
YES - check the review....
http://hangout.altsounds.com/reviews/108102-kieronononon-the-primrose-pub-leeds-live.html
I can't find a youtube video of them doing that song - I'll ask him!
And yeah you should watch Tool Academy - I think it's on the 4oD website so you can just stream it.x
http://brutaltechnopunk.com/
is your brother goatboy, floatstarpx or orta?
just out of interest.
orta
from the horses mouth
:D
not only do we have a toolette posting on DiS, but also a toolette's brother.
amazing scenes
ORTA!
do you like Cardiacs?
Your band are mental and remind me of Cardiacs.
Cardiacs
They sound like something like my guitarist would love, so yeah I wouldnt be surprised to hear he likes them. TBH, I've just thrown some into my spotify playlist to hear more of them.
my internet is pretty crap at home
but i will try to watch the next episode when it comes out! (and also check out your brother's band)
They remind me a bit of The Cardiacs.
Ask you brother if he likes The Cardiacs, cheers.
A new quote for the next Drowned in Sound press release
Becky Maslen says, "its an awesome website - I am bookmarking it on my laptop!xx" via Twitter.
Whilst Becky Constantinou opines, "Hahha luvvin drownedinsound!! Shout out to u guys!! Xxx" and "awww bless these guys r cute!! Xx"
There will be a new full-time developer on DiS within the month at this rate.
In the future, when drowned in Sound is a multimillion pound
reality TV fan site, we can look back and say this was the day things changed.
In seriousness, Sean, forget about so called "band" takeovers - there is no reason why the two beckys can't do a takeover...
That would be awesome and slightly weird at the same time.
Incredible. Truly incredible.
^this
I'm rather pleased with how this has gone.
"my work here is done*
*meowington disappears through office doors into cloud of dry ice
Rebuild Tool
Becky; what do you think of the band TooL?
Becky M, what's your favourite Pavement album?
Also, what do you think the prospects are for a Jawbreaker reunion?
The public must know!
Seriosuly Becky, I demand an answer.
Until she answers i think it is safe to say she is too indie for Pavement.
..........
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pavement_(band) - well it would be the one that sounds like tower of the terror...Terror Twilight! I don't know who this band is but its worth a listen with that name.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jawbreaker_(band) - by the sounds of it one of the band members - Blake - doesn't seem ready enough to be back in the band - maybe they could replace him??
For Pavement start with the album Slanted & Enchanted.
That is all.
You just can't replace Blake, he's the main dude!
Concise and accurate analysis of the likelihood of a reunion though, I fear it will never happen. :(
I'm just posting to say I was here.
Watching this now
seriously incredible viewing. Today has been great.
i feel like the last person to have broadband connected
what the utter hell is going on? i seem to have missed this years "Showgirls" thread.
however, there appears to be a USA version
that i need get on.
and these guise must be pissed
http://www.thetoolacademy.com/
:D
amazing
i've not watched it yet but I want Becky Maslen to win already.
seriously going to enjoy the rest of Tool Academy cheering on Becky and Danny!
Thank you!
To be honest I wanted Joe to win as he seemed like the nicest
and his girlfriend seemed like the most unkind....I know you've said she is lovely, but she did CONSTANTLY call him "gay" and batter his confidence.
Anyways, he's gone so you guys FTW.
I know you can't tell me if you won the competition...but have you come into a large sum of money recently? Say in the region of £25, 000 ;)
Becky!
What proportion of the chumps/chimps on here would you say are sufficiently toolish enough for academy status?
Tbf the girls arent nearly as bad as i thought they'd be
most of them are normal. A fair amount of them are genuinely fit. Becky M looks a bit like meowington and they should probably be friends. The guys are all fucking weird. That's all i've got for my review really.
She looks nothing like me!
I HAVE COLOUR.
errr
you're not black meo.
nah you look similar
probably
We don't.
Tool Academy takes over DiS
please oh please make it so
Abby getting a bit of grief on Twitter!
http://twitter.com/#!/F12ABY
she hasnt started following me has she?
I'm gonna tell her to now.
='D
there's so many levels to this
someone talk to Angry Tool about Greek women and carts please
fannies
I can't believe I missed all this.
I miss becky.
hello people of the future.
make yourself comfortable.
what an amazing time to be alive.
TOOLSPOT:
I got an excited text from a mate, apparently he works with one of the tools and his toolette in the admin section of a poorly performaing finance company.
They were kicked off in the first week though, which makes them quite low in the tool heirarchy. Max and Kim, which I think is vain tool? Anyway, apparently his knowledge of power tools is rubbish.
.....
Max and Kim - he is Football Tool. :-) I didn't see much of Max but Kimberley is lovely.
I can't remember them that much, other than football tool made vain tool sulk because he lost in the football.
Must suck getting kicked off in the first round.
Football tool was the one the presenter said
looked like a lizard! He did look like a lizard, but wasn't that much of a tool. The less toolish are getting kicked off first.
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4276095#r5825905
Maslen!
I look forward to welcoming you and your Tool into my lounge this evening. I may actually make a bowl of popcorn for the occasion.
Popcorn- good call!
I'm going to celebrate with some out of date aero yoghurts.
I'm on a health kick now so I will be treating myself to a peach.
CAN'T WAIT.
I think I may now know who has just started following me on Twitter.
Hi!
I'm one of the few whose twitter and username have no link.
you're on twitter?
AND YOU NEVA TELT ME?
DO YOU HAVE A CHILD WITH ANOTHER WOMAN?
:(
I think I may now know who has just started following me on Twitter.
BRILLIANT!
I am going for doritos and salsa dip for tonight! Hope you enjoy the show - I'll be sat shaking, hoping I (or Dan) haven't done anything too bad!! I'll check back tomorrow :-)
Bumped in anticipation..
I've got a feeling today is going to be the first time firearms make an appearance..
I'm not going to make it to the end of tonights episode as my eyes are already dropping
:(
Coffee, or gin!
Get to it, or you'll feel like an ill informed chump tomorrow!
I am trying
but its difficult. I can catch up in work in the morning if I miss anything!
I haven't heard of this.
TIME. CHANNEL.
E4 NOW
(It's also in HD, but I'd only recommend that for experienced toolwatchers.)
thank you!
Amazing, the wedding vows sound like kids reading out their lines in a school play.
It's like William
Shatner is read
Ing out his lines
From an Auto
Cue that he's never read
Before
:D
Also, the autocue has been programmed by a drunk horse.
YAY!
I 'ope she wears sumfin fackin nice!
Maslen!
Look but don't touch, yeah?!
I get why some of the guys fancy their partners
BUT HOW THE FUCK DO ANY OF THE GIRLS... MINDBLOWN.
WOOP THERE IT IS!
Sad cliff, you wrong'un.
sad cliff :D
still the best
whenever I see him I think of that, and the cool runnings joke about drawing a line on someones head so they look like a butt.
This is brilliant :')
Makes us all look like the most charming bastards in the world.
^This so much!
dinner/shagintheloo?
Oh you!
I'd better wear something fackin' nice.
Wotevas gonna keep yer ankles warm darhlin
Legwarmers?!
Why did they cut the bit out where he admits to fingering her
WHY??? She needs to see that! He's lying his way out of it, the wease.
*l
*slipping her a didge
I can't watch tonight's episode until it goes up on 4OD as I have no TV
but can I just say that Temper Tool's girlfriend was:
a) super filthy hot
b) incredible: "I MISS YOU ALREADY, YOU LITTLE SHIT!"
I was crying with laughter.
I reckon he's the most improved
there should be quotes on that.
Oh my! I'm excited about the fingering!
I think Scout has just won at Twitter.
:(
It really made me laugh if that helps.
Maslen!
You are a steak not a burger! :D
:D
I do like venturing outside my indie-ghetto into the world of mainstream entertainment once a week.
Is this what real people are like?
I think so
I'm scared of the outside world
This programme definitely isn't helping with that
she's staying with the sad cliff
lol wut?
Nah, she won't. Look at the body language in the cab.
(Also what Becky M said somewhere..)
I don't think she did when the camera's stopped rolling...
IHopefully Maslen can clear that up for us...
yeah
Becky definitely said Toni was his ex-girlfriend. GOOD.
Defo - NOT together anymore
.....Liam and Toni that is!
I think I was quite drained of colour BUT we won the TASK wooooooooo.
Glad Liam and Toni left??
yep
he was beyond redeeming, and she hadn't been with him that long, so it didn't seem worth the effort to fix his toolishness.
Well done your tool on winning the task! I would have liked to have heard longer clips of the songs.
Me Too!! Danny was....
awesome - you can download the mp3s on the E4.com website however you don't see the actual performance which is annoying.
Danny WAS awesome.
Peter's song: brilliant.
I genuinely hope you won it, by far the best couple.
I do have a lot of love for stoner tool, though.
I also like Lazy Tool...
He seems to be really committing to the experience and wants to improve things with his girlfriend. He's a big cuddly bear!
That's what got me about them...all of those issues after just 4 months
Christ, that's the 'honeymoon period', what would the relationship have been like later on?
FOUR
Shit, thought they said fourteen. Why would you bother? Christ.
Indeed...
I kinda think Toni has trust issues and was hoping that would be something it would help her get over.
Unfortunately, she was absolutely right to have trust issues with sad cliff.
This is what I said in the OP
Ridiculous! You could never have a good relationship if after four months you're like that.
I only managed to the first ad break, then i needed to get some sleep
what's the one called who looks a bit like the Lurch character from Hot Fuzz? He made me chuckle.
Nice to put a face to a Drowned In Sound ID as well, Becky Maslen!
Dave, Massive Tool
ahh that's who he reminds me of. Hope he says "yarp" at some point.
I enjoyed last nights episode
The highlight of my night was scouts tweet.
^This, ^This
A thousand times ^This.
So, I went to school with Geezer Tool
Can't believe I've only just realised this after it was pointed out to me by somebody else
What was he like?
Doesn't seem bad to me at all.
Yeah bit of a cheeky chappy
Exactly like he appears in the show really
Geezer Tool isn't all that bad thinking about it...
In fact I don't think I really dislike any of the blokes left in now. I mean, some of them would probably be annoying to hang around with irl, but they've all grown on my a bit - especially as they all seem willing to send themselves up a bit etc.
Hus comes out with some absolutely pearls, Like when he was trying to console Liam a bit, but was just saying things like 'You're lucky you only got hit a couple of times....I'll be honest I felt for the girl....you fackin arshole ahaha'
I thought the show lost it last night,
just wasn't that good. More could have been made of the fingering etc, I wanted LOADS of tears and madness. She didn't seem that arsed in the end, and fair enough she split with him after - but that should have happened on it.
meh, my brief delve into tv like that is now more than likely over.......unless Becky convinces me to stick with it of course!?
Next weeks episode
I'm pretty sure I heard the teaser correctly.
'how can I make it good, up the bum?'. Not sure which toolette this was. I mean, I know this is channel 4, but that's a bit near the mark right?
I'm still going to watch it obvs.
think it was Tipsy Tool's missus
Yep, heard that too
and something along the lines of "you have to tell her about her vagina"
This is the bloke who played the fake vicar:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tim_FitzHigham
also
How on earth could they think it was a real marriage?
What sort of crazy TV show would say 'yep, you guys have real relationship issues, so we're going to marry you'?
Tool Academy obviously!
oh crap, i know that guy!
i worked with him two summers ago. He's in Flanders and Swann tribute act, fact fans. Pretty odd guy.
I haven't seen the F&S tribute, but I've seen his standup a couple of times.
I think he's brilliant.
I initially dismissed this as standard E4 fluff.
but considering the amount of love it's getting here (and some of the quotes) I'm starting to feel like I should watch this.
Nah, its standard E4.
Nothing remotely productive about it. But its good trashy, stupid TV.
the stoner one practising song ahahaha
fidelity.... fidelity....
and the bit where he's asked his girlfriends name and takes about 8 seconds to answer :'D
I hope Becky M is getting paid for driving up Tool Academy ratings
especially now the best* one has gone.
*best as in the one who will draw in most viewers.
I love this thread
and website :)
Are we still committed to this?
I am. Even if Sad cliff is gone.
I AM
hip_y_g reminded me....thank goodness for him.
my housemate is out for the next two episodes
not sure i can face watching it alone. will miss the BANTS.
TATTOOS?
Fuck.
Pete didn't get one because of his "modelling".
Yeah, alright mate.
poof
I would've respected him if he'd just said,
dude I am NOT getting the fucking Tool Academy logo tattooed on me
HE HAS BECKY'S NAME NOW.
IT'S OKAY.
Maybe he should've won the romance task after all, eh?
:D
that drop of johnny cash's "hurt" there is the best use of music on a tv show ever!
Danny about Becky C
''she's doing my head in'' hahaha too right.
Fucking hell. Now she's crying.
i want a 2nd tattoo
thread to follow
My god, that Pete and Becky segment was long, tedious and miserable.
Might as well kill themselves.
She is vile.
He's alright though.
He needs to get over himself.
She needs to take a flying fuck very far away.
OH MY FUCKING BUM
DID YOU DOUBLE DIP THAT DICK?
NEVER double dip.
You dipped the dick...
AND THEN YOU DIPPED IT AGAIN
Anal Sex demo
Arrrrrraahahahaha THE SPITTING
:'D
the thoughtful pause when asked if she'd do ass to mouth :D
just when i thought i wouldnt want to watch this anymore. THAT ^^^^ happened.
amazing stuff.
Yeah
to be honest the first half or two thirds was a bit dull last night. But the sex therapy was well worth the wait.
Next week there are mock funerals as one of the tasks. I'm salivating.
i only saw the sex part. an hour and half is way too long for any progrmame.
especially one where after every break you get 5 mins of the last 15 summarised. boring.
An hour and a half?
It's on from 10-11pm meths. Think about about it.
whatever trevor.
half of it is repeated during the show anyway. its probably only about 23 mins long.
this is so awful
:D
this is me
makes the doll wank itself. Amazing.
This is worse than a DiS sex thread.
I love pussy
I'm a freak
Oh God!
Tasty pussies
I really wish I'd finished my dinner before watching Hus spit on a puppet's arsehole.
JFC.
:D
Oh Christ
:'D
Just realised Harry looks a bit like a geezer Simon Cowell.
DANNY!
phew
I like Hus though :(
AHAHHAH
Mock funerals next week!
bit harsh, bit brilliant
Funeral task?
HEAVIER THAN A DEATH IN THE FAMILY.
Brilliant stuff last night.
Felt a bit sorry for Pete - when she kept asking him 'why are you talking like that? That's not my Pete etc' when he was acting like a gentleman I kept thinking 'but you put him up for this programme to help him change his ways, and he's making the effort?' strange.
The mock funeral thing next week looks Chris Morris-worthy.
Poor Pete
really think his Toolette should be kicked out.
She really is a rancid douche-bag,
with the intellect of a pre-school child. It seems to me like she uses 90% of he brain power trying to make the muscles on her face work.
Danny and Becky M made love! Awwww.
I'd happily kick Pete's missus right in the cunt
I've only just watched this
It was great. I cried when Hus spat on the puppets bottom.
I LOVE Becky C. I really do however I am worried as when she was making the shelf thing, she reminding me of myself. She's not from Essex, is she?
she is excrutiating
*literally* unbearable. and i've only seen her on tv.
Don't get me wrong
I only love her because she's unbearable. I don't think I'd like to see more than 30 minutes of her.
Cool
So you love her for entertainment value, right?
Wouldn't piss on her is she was on fire though?!
Fake deaths tonight!
I am so staying up for tonights one
can't wait !
Also this thread is kinda long
I'm pretty knackered today...
am going to try and stay up for it though. Not sure I can face missing the mock funerals.
15 MINUTES!!
Shall I start a new thread????????
No!
Certainly not young lady! This one is perfect
takes so fucking long to load
i'll leave it though
ITS ON
ITS ON
ITS ON!!!
I'm very jet lagged, I think this one is going to have to be 4OD'd.
no it's not
Tools and their Twags
Something new every week with this show.
becky looks propa rouggh ennet
poor Danny
I feel his pain
Becky C doing something
this is gonna end in tears.
so not looking forward to the eulogy round
THIS HAS ONLY STARTED AND ITS ALREADY HEAVY
DDDDD:
Christ on a bike.
This is truly horrendous. Everybody involved should hang their heads in shame.
fucking hell that was awful
Bobby to win though. That guy is amazing.
when that fat one fell in the water
:'''')
I want to fuck you
What a romantic girl :D
^ this.
course i am i wanna fuck you!
Excellent episode
Naturally I'm gutted that Becky C and Pete are gone. She was my favourite person ever to appear on TV (other than JWOWW)
I think Iove Hawke.
He's a whole lot of man.
Wasn't he on Dirty Sanchez when they did that world tour?
If i remember rightly he was equally brilliant on that.
well that was pretty black humour with the fake funeral/coffin huh.
Great episode though. Hawke! What a guy; I reckon he should have been there every week whipping them into shape.
Lee just leaving his 'girlfriend' by a tree. :D
I'd like Bobby or Harry to win I think.
Apparently they wanted to put the girls in the coffins.
They said no.
SEMI FINAL TONIGHT
Geezer Tool
Stoner Tool
Massive Tool
Jealous Tool
Chuffin' Hell!
Danny to win.
I caught up with last week's episode yesterday. Brilliant stuff - I actually got a bit upset in the mock funerals!
Seems like Lee is pissing everyone off now - hope he goes tonight.
I saw ep 1 of series 3 of US Tool Academy yesterday
Amazingly, a guy who wants to be a pro wrestler got beaten in a wresting match by a lesbian, prompting him to quit the show.
The people on the US show are a bit special. The majority actually admitted to camera that they cheated on their partners often. They have girl tools too, but the partners are a bit less mental than on the UK version.
Heh, I spotted my parents in the finale preview!
ITS THE TOOL ACADEMY FINAL
*excited*
Danny and Becky have blatantly won and she was just keeping it quiet. She tweeted that she forgot her password a little while ago but I bet she'll remember it when they win and she comes on bragging about how her boyfriend is really sexy and...yeah. He's pretty hot actually.
Yeah, he is
It's not as good now
That there are only likeable/non-dickhead people left.
they should win
not just because she's our DiS-friend, they're also the best.
I think you're right,
although I'd be happy to see Massive Tool win as well. He seems a pretty decent bloke.
yeah danny - totally would
I'm excited by the dinners
WHAT AN ENDING!
To my shame, I was grinning from ear to ear. Well done Danny and Becky... *wipes a tear from his eye*
ALSO: It said at the start that Danny is 6ft1. So how tall is Rick? He was a whole head taller than him. He's some kind of giant.
I'm so glad Danny won
And that Becky kept it all a secret from us. U had goosebumps and I cried a little. I'm not ashamed. It was a truly brilliant TV series.
u had?
I had.
u had?
I had.