Your are viewing a read-only archive of the old DiS boards. Please hit the Community button above to engage with the DiS !
and should i be disheartened someone has said it to me when i'm 22?
"Person I fuck occasionally but it's too complicated or we can't be arsed having a proper relationship or we had a relationship and it didn't work but the sex is good enough that we'll pretend having this kind of thing going on is healthy and liberating and it won't be unutterably gutting when the other person finds somebody else"
If you can't take the sex without the emotional attachment, just don't fucking do it.
"if she's already lying down then give her one". i sort of agree with this, but...
It's probably really really much better if you're NOT friends. How good friends are you? Does she talk about her personal problems with you (obviously a good gauge on this message board) or she pretty relaxed and you have fun, without anything getting stressful.
Also - if the sex turns out to be really bad, you'll forever be remembering the person being naked and awkward
then prepare to smile
I said yes because I thought it meant she's a 'fit friend' and I checked her out a lot.
im not sure if i like you but dont want to lose your friendship if things dont work
i want sex
Its not my style.
then we'll advise properly
Trust me, don't do it. DON'T DO IT!!! It will all end in tears when you will want to snuggle with her i the morning and you wake up after a great night of banging and she's not there and you feel all used and hurt.
...Or you could listen to your gut. If you're questioning it then that's a big sign of noooooooo.
but you know what I man
you raise a strong point.
but on the other hand...
Well then go for it. I don't know many women who has/enjoys a fuck buddy. if she's already lying down then give her one.
for casual sex if casual sex will end up ending it.
If you want a nice covenient stop gap then go for it.
Have you had sex with her or has anything happened yet? How did it come about? Also, do you fancy her?
I mean really, don't dilute the idea and take advice from a messageboard full of people, some of which may have issues of their own from their past experience.
Do what you feel is right. And if doing her feels right then do her.
a terrible idea if not.
the only time i've got benefits from a friend, it got weird/is still weird.
you think you'll be all cool and relaxed and cosmopolitan like off the telly and those films. but it's just a bit...weird. and awkward. awkward and weird. and not very beneficial.
i might be biased though because all my sexual experiences seem to end in shame, embarresment and awkwardness. so it might be better to get a second opinion.
...'and such small portions', *cough*..
If you're not looking for a relationship with her and she's ok with that, then +++ benefits.
Same if you're both open to the possibility at some point down the line, and after many years of spouting women's may type bullshit to the contrary, I think a very carnal approach to a relationship is essential from the outset.
If there's a risk of somebody getting burned because of mismatched intentions, however, then don't do it. Sex is easy to come by and it's not worth upsetting a friend over.
but was distracted (i.e. am lazy). I thought it was fairly universally accepted that sex was on tap for everyone who was willing to compromise on their preconceived standards.
<Doesn't wait around for obvious boyfriend related gag>
pulling people you don't fancy is like taking candy from a baby
you know it's wrong and you feel a bit sick afterwards
that lasts 12 pages. When we do, I'm blaming you.
"I think I might have feelings for you" "dick. gtfo."
and make their own jam, too.
I think Fuck Buddy signifies someone you have casual sex with but don't necessarily have any kind of other relationship with. I imagine a friend with benefits to be someone you hang out with quite a lot.
But what do I know, I'm a serial monogamist.
are fairly interchangable terms.
It's just that one term sounds slightly less sleazy than the other.
If you're having sex with someone you hang out with a lot, you may as well just refer to them as your bf or gf as that's effectively what is going on.
FWB's or FB's aren't really friends (or buddies), just casual shag partners. The main point is that it's to scratch an itch, something occasional, no strings, no emotional ties, no pressure and no sleepovers.
If you want the snuggly times you have to commit to all else that comes with having a regular sexual partner. Otherwise it's gtfo as soon as the sex is finished. It's the only way to keep those boundaries in place.