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me-in a library. right now.
but I kind of squeaked and ran away.
i guess the library incident could have been awkward to though.
and I thought he was just trying to be polite, and he even said that that he liked to talk to people in steam rooms to make the time go faster. BUT his opening line was 'do you come here often?' and although I couldn't see him for the steam, I imagine that he looked rapey.
And even if the intentions were completely platonic, wtf are you doing man, trying to talk to me when I'm trying to steam?!
ie. if it was at the beach it would be ok right? :S
than being half-naked and alone in a 6x6 metre marble steamy room with a man I can't see.
I been going swimming alot recently and striking up convos in the steam and suna rooms quite easily..hopefully its not seen as inappropriate by everyone :)
me with bright purple putrid face and sweat and snot everywhere. I am pertty convinced he couldn't see me either!
this will not end well.
Sub thread: fittest mum you have banged at a birthday party?
Mine was your ma
you ran with it, friend.
Emptied...like 100%...in the end all that was coming out was hot air...hurt a bit actually
at Bolton Baths every Saturday when I was at high school. It was horribly uncomfortable as you knew their little willy was floating just below the surface and there was no where to run without standing up and climbing over and thus shoving your bum in their faces.
she did have a fit bod though.
but I went to jump about in the wave machine and play 'name that tune' underwater
of course I did, it was awesome :)
My mates liked hanging out in the sleazy bit, I only went in with them so I didn't get called frigid. I'm so glad I'm not 14 anymore.
Apologies for my finding your adolescent squirming amusing.
I remember one guy just trying to snog me anyway in front of some old biddies.
Now THAT'S being creepy.
Yup. Any small thoughts? :-/
This was on weekdays, though, and it was mostly girls at my school.
100% failure rate, too.
was very tall. If I find out it was you IMAKILLYOU.
^awful sentence of the day.
or I am a massive one?
Can it mean neither please? :(
"do you want to come home with me?"
"this is my girlfriend"
"so...*shrugs*...do you want to or not?"
it was a wedding tho, so i'm guessing she may have had a few ales.
I'd be more confident in building a nuclear reactor than chatting a girl up I reckon. I've literally got no idea how to do it.
Although the jaccuzzi room at Bolton Baths could be a good start...
It was brilliant, though. You had to walk outside barefoot in your swimming trunks to get to the stairs that took you to the top of the big slide.
Paedo's paradise, it was.
and this guy sitting a few tables in front of me, walked over and dropped a napkin on my table which read:
'How are you finding the book?'
With a box labelled 'Good' and another 'Bad'. I didn't respond. he then dropped another one on my table which read: 'Did you know that besides Burroughs being on drugs when he wrote it, but the publisher actually accidentally mixed the chapters up'
Tbh it may not have been a chat up attempt, but it was the weirdest thing to happen to me in a Starbucks.
I bet he leaves passive agressive notes on his fridge for his housemates, and sighs a lot.
Leaving a quirky little note asking about a shared interest in a busy chain coffee shop in the middle of the day. So many creeps around these days. The worst feeling in the world is "a bit uncomfortable" and that is how they make me feel. Its awful to meet new people.
Probably a serial killer
that would have been brilliant. I have an unhealthy fascination with them.
if he was super hot. I'm guessing he wasn't because a super hot boy would never go to such (/any) effort.
Your defence of my post was all that mattered
‘Affected,’ more like.
but if you don't get a response, take the hint.
To be honest, the worst thing about this anecdote is that he's got the publication history of Naked Lunch COMPLETELY ass-backwards, and clearly doesn't understand the cut-up principles involved. What a doofus.
Its so difficult being an attractive woman.
walking into the lower classes of a primary school, sitting down and proudly pulling the bookmark out of a copy of The Davinci Code.
You're basically inviting a ten year old from one of the higher classes to walk over and say "i've read that I thought it was overrated".
but no one ever does. They just look a bit creepy and like they're gonna approach me, then they just walk off.
he sounds great.
If I couldn't be bothered or didn't like the look of him I'd have at least given him a quick nod to say "yeah thanks I'm alright though" instead of completely ignoring him like a baby.
it clearly was you writing the notes wasn't it?
Tickboxguy: What are going to have as starter?
Msmonipenni: I was thinking maybe just the sou.....
Tickboxguy: No.....in the box
Msmonipenni: *ticks the box*
Tickboxguy: She’ll have the soup, thanks.
He thought I was gay. She whispered into my ear "do you want to go home with my friend?" and pointed forward. I couldn't see his face because the whole time he was sitting about 10m in front of me but watching what was happening in a mirror in front of him. He still didn't turn around but stuck up a hand like an Indian Chieftain would wave. I shook my head and she kissed me on the cheek. I lied and told my puzzled friends who were watching the whole exchange but couldn't hear because of the loud Bon Jovi music that SHE had asked if I wanted to go home with her and I'd said no. Great, great times.
Well I never.
that a gay person would think "no hetero man could ever look that lost surrounded by so many grinding fannies"
I refuse to go to strip clubs, so I went under huge duress. I sat in the corner drinking Bud and watching SSN. On mute.
This stripper KEPT on coming up to me asking if I wanted a dance, and I kept on rejecting her. More and more awkwardly each time. Eventually she sat down next to me and held my hand and said "Come one, my darling, why don't you want a dance". Impatiently, I replied:
"Because I've got a girlfriend at home, who I love, and who I don't have to pay £30 to see naked"
She walked off, crying.
I left soon after.
I honest to fuck tried to let her down gently but it came out all wrong...
to pay for medicine for her sickly child you heartless bastard.
Were you wearing your cowboy boots at the time?
I did not do the chatting up
Talking about a dead guy and how he was crushed to bits in a car crash is not the way to seduce me.
seems reasonable to me
You're welcome to her. I'll let you know the next time someone I know dies, you could find your soulmate?
I hope she didn't want you to "lick her foofoo" whilst she was cremating someone.
Nah, I think even she had a semblance of dignity. She did ask if she could stay over as "she didn't want to be alone tonight, we could all die tomorrow" - sexy stuff
I'm not sure why you turned her down.
I hope this doesn't affect us :'(
No one wants to date someone who misquotes them.
But he chatted up a girl on another table in a pub quiz leaving notes on their sheet when they sent it over for marking
Did it work?
But reported back that she was "intolerably stupid"
Not the sort of lass you'd expect at a pub quiz.
If I ever have to try this in future I'll add a 'Dead Wood' disclaimer...
He's like practically a genius or something so he has high standards
(i don't have much to add to this thread other than making stuff appear in the right place)
I thought this was one of those 'point and laugh at other people' threads.
i didnt use a punchline or owt. i was sat next to a girl and it turns out we are doing a similar course, and she asked if she could have a look at one of the books i'd gotten to read. we ended up talking a bit and she seemed really nice (and pretty) so i gave her my number when she left.
with reference to this:
After a car accident at the side of the Motorway.
i had the same though, but thats another story for another thread
She just happened to be using a men's toilet at the time.
Thinking back she had a beard, Adam's apple and very hairy hands...
In that case the boy's a damn good fuck.
he said "you want to come round?" I said "nah". That was it.
you've been chatted up a lot.
now, any stories where you have been the chatter, and not chattee, would be welcomed.
although my situation was a lot less forced/awkward then i probably made it sound like
Not anywhere strange, it was at a gig, but it seemed noteworthy and slightly flattering. She was somewhat butch, which I'm taking to mean that I am all feminine.
That can't be right. Have I? No. I don't know. No. Hmm.
By a woman who was off her tits on coke. she pinned me up against the wall. my god if i was a lesbian i'd be getting so much action.
THAT WASN'T ME </shifty>
She asked me what I was doing after and I said "Going on Colossus" and left it at that.
I was 16/17
What do I win?
when I am in "transient" places like motorway services and airports. I think it's because if I embarrass myself then the chances are they will live in the other end of the country anyway, so nothing to lose. If I could just find a way to have the same game in nightclubs as I do at Watford Gap sevices.
Chatting up at gigs is to be expected, but this was near the front and as you'll know if you've been at the front for a gig populated by Kerrang-reading, Avenged Sevenfold-listening, relentless-drinking fuckwits and Taylor Swift fans there is barely any breathing space.
There was literally 5cm between our faces. I was very glad of the fact I chewed a lot of gum while queuing for the gig that evening.
in an extremely bizarre manner. i'm on a computer and the guy opposite me whispered something and i couldn't hear him and he had to repeat it about five times and it turned out to be "you're going to need a holiday with all that work you're doing!" and i say uh yeah i guess so [nervous laugh], and go back to typing. then 5 minutes later he asks if i am from london. and i say no, and go back to typing. and then he gets up, takes about 15 minutes to get his stuff together and put on a coat, then walks round the long way to go by my computer and - HERE IS THE WEIRDEST PART - comes up to me, says "well it was nice to meet you, here are some earphones if you want them" - gives me a pair of earphones and then leaves. weirdest library experience ever.
in conclusion, no, jordan_229_2, i do not want to go out with you
i'm so deeply baffled. were they his earphones? were they just some earphones he found in the library and thought hey this will make a really great gift for some girl i've never met? why would you just give someone a pair of earphones?
I reckon he's in bed now with the pillow scrunched around his head 'Headph..FUCKING..what the FUCK were you thinking FUCKING HEADPHO-FUCK!'
although i like his style.
isn't "here are some earphones if you want them?" a Morrisey b-side?
we decided to watch We Are Scientists at Leeds Met in a sudden desire for 2005 nostalgia. As soon as I'd heard GReat Escape I came out and sat in the bar waiting for the others. A 7/10 Aussie girl comes and sits across from me and we start laughing together at this line of boys at the bar whose arses are hanging out their jeans, and bonding over old we are scientists songs that we like. Then she's like "just waiting for my boyfriend he's in the toilet. we're on a break though but he's kinda trying to get it going again. i'm not so sure myself."
weird. then he comes back and she's like "we were just talking about you!". if i wasn't a bit drunk it'd have been a bit uncomfortable. i soon shot off when da boiz got out. but yeah. leeds met. shit hole.