It's like the guy gets his five year old kids to come up with a joke and just goes along with it.
There can't be anyone out there who checks it and goes "Heh. He's nailed it again." Can there? A: Yes. In a world where Michael McIntyre exists, everything is funny.
(I would've posted this in the heavy handed satire thread, but it's not even satire, is it?)
So yeah, The Metro. Utter shite, but I've slipped into the habit of flicking through it, after giving it a wide berth for a while.
On the upside, look at this cheeky fella: http://www.flickr.com/photos/khosla/5166622309