Have you noticed sometimes on Facebook
that really fucking thick people don't just make typos, but use completely different words because that's what they obviously think the word is in the particular phrase that they're using. That's (ironically) badly worded so if you don't know what I mean, here's an example I just saw that I can't believe.
A girl posted a Facebook status relating to her having just recently moved house. Someone commented underneath with this:
"where bounce u livin hun."
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OMG
where did you get that playsuit?
I don't get it.
yeah i once saw someones status that said 'on it like carbonit'
instad of on it like a car bonnet. which is a stupid thing to say in the first place, making him doubly stupid.
Perhaps they meant to say "On it like carbonite"
Which to be fair is just as nonsensical
Can you be more pacific?
^ This
I'm chomping at the bit to find out whether you have any more examples.
Aks per lightly them.
Just thought of another one...
'why' instead of 'while'. It's so weird. Do they say these things out loud but no one notices?
Not really related but I don't want to make a new thread...
Absolute Radio's status was asking people what they thought of The XX winning the mercury prize...
ND: Music died in 1995
AA: I think 2005 was the limit, I can categorically say I haven't got any music past 2005, it starts to thin out around 2004.
GC: rubbish music. thats all that is made now a days. fast food music that will be gone tomorrow and not rememberd next year. arctic monkeys are the ONLY band out there doin it.....you only play bands that are "indie" (horrible people)
HORRIBLE INDIE PEOPLE :)
Someone made a thread about an XX advert being on TV last night
so I think this one would be justified.
That's a shame, 2006 was a vintage year for music
"you could of done better"
RAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGERAGE
Aaargh, this is the worst!
People who use 'of' instead of 'have'.
CUNTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHERE BOUNCE!
:D
I have to say, not really.
Sort of linked
The way Scott "twat" Mills says "so and so Of of Somewhere" instead of "from" - what a bellwhiff
"bellwhiff"
:D
Our newspaper style guide says to say "so-and-so, of somewhere" rather than from.
We also have to write email as e-mail, so it's all a little antiquated.
Oh, and the one that causes the most fuss: We have to say something is "in" a road rather than "on" it. Annoying.
That style guide needs some work
All three of those are wrong grammatically. For a newspaper that is pretty shocking
Is the 'of' thing gramatically incorrect?
Even if it technically is, hasn't it slipped into accepted usage now, y'know' like 'Disgusted of Tunbridge Wells'? And like the way it now seems acceptable to say 'try and do...' rather than 'try to do...'?
I think they're a matter of taste rather than gramatically wrong, but I do generally prefer the ones we don't do.
Actually, in or on I'm not fussed about, I just always forget what it's supposed to be so it annoys me.
Same at my newspaper, 'in' rather than 'on'
although a sub once explained why it was grammatically correct to me, although I can't remember what he said now.
We don't have the 'of' thing though, it's open season as far as that's concerned.
The word 'around' (when referring to numbers) is pretty much banned in our style guide, we have to say 'about'.
Yeah, same here, you go around a corner.
Same with "more than" and "over" - you jump over fences, but have more than ten races and so on.
I like that all of your friends are gammatically correct.
Gammatically
Brilliant.
smoke threw a wond
I saw this once and it has always stayed with me:
"If your going to slag me of you could of used proper English"
:D
Reminds me of a Mark Goldberg quote: "Attilio [Lombardo] speaks a lot better English that what people think he does."
reminds me of this :D
Moe: You know what really aggravazes me? It's them immigants. They wants all the benefits of living in Springfield, but they ain't even bother to learn themselves the language.
Homer: Hey, those are exactly my sentimonies.
Barney: [babbles]
Moe: Yeah, you said it Barn.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=55sjaEDJ65k
"Wander" instead of "wonder" and vice versa.
"So-and-so is wandering whether [weather] to go for a walk"
"So-and-so just had a good wonder in the park with the dog"
Spoken rather than written, but still:
eXpresso rather than espresso - especially bad when someone working in a coffee shop does this, they must see the word written down thousands of times every day. Where's the fucking 'x'?
That's possibly the most middle-class complaint anyone has ever made.
I was once with a friend who ordered some herbal tea
and the lady behind the counter asked him if she was supposed to put milk into it.
Fucking hell
Some people are no better than animals
no i think that would be the 'choreetho' vs 'chorITZO' argument
but i do hate expresso/espresso. also patent/pantent.
patent/pantent
Do what?
That's just pronunciation, though
Innit?
I was in a generally very nice tea shop a couple of months ago
and ordered mate.
After about fifteen minutes, the waiter brought some latte. It seemed a simple mishearing, so I very politely said that I had actually asked for mate, but would drink the latte anyway since it was there.
The waiter didn't move, and instead stood looking at me like I was from another planet, so I showed him in the menu what I had meant. Now speaking as if he were talking to a small child, he said 'Oh! Mate!', pronouncing it to rhyme with gate.
I hate being wrongly corrected. At least I got the mate in the end.
What the fuck is "mate"?
Some sort of poncey coffee isn't it?
Although I think it is properly pronounced without accenting the e, if you see what I meant. People just do that so it doesn't sound like they're asking for a cup of their friend.
OK, it's not not coffee at all
All is explained here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mate_%28beverage%29
I read that and still don't get it.
Is it some poncey tea, like wot ponceys drink?
Pronouncing it with two syllables is correct.
But that doesn't mean it should be written with a diacritic, as the wikipedia article you linked to explains.
Sorry, don't know who you are mate
your username
and this post really don't match up.
You're not alone.
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4266610#r5561953
someone brought me a set of coffee cups for Christmas
and the little ones all say 'expresso' on them. There just small coffee cups to, not even expresso cups. Couldn't of got it more wrong lol.
"of"
^deliberate mistake & i'm claiming my five pounds
but "brought", "There" and "to" are all fine?
For shame, Wza.
Ah. Fuck.
I was rushing out of the office at the time. Carnt believe I missed those.
It's expresso in France
Doesn't make it right of course. I just deemed it a little bizarre.
Here's middle-class for you
I was at a restaurant with a bunch of people for a friend's birthday, and the girl next to me asks in a small-talk way what I was going to order. Here's how it went, phonetically:
Me: Probably the broosketta first, then --
Her (I think involuntarily): BrooSHETTa.
Me: I can't believe you just corrected me, like a child. And actually, SCH is a hard sound in Italian, so it is broosketta.
Well, I didn't really say that. I just went "Er, yeah" and carried on. But still, REALLY
you were right too, i think it is Broosketta
my old housemate is half Italian and she would say broosketta at least once a day
I've got this girl on Facebook who I only have to remind myself how much cleverer than her I am, when I need it the most.
Here is a list of the last 2 weeks' Facebook statuses:
Is thinkin about ma babe
Is alway thinkin about ma gorgous babe
Thinkin about ma babe
Is goin to have a dream about ma babe
Had a gud dream last nite about ma babe
Is alway thinkin about ma babe
I am thinkin about ma babe
Goin to dream about ma gorgous babe and i am thinkin about ma babe
Is always thinkin about ma gorgous babe
Is goin to dream about ma babe and is always thinkin about ma babe
I get the feeling she likes her babe.
who I have only to remind myself...
:( fail
reads like lyrics :D
MA BABE
MA GORGOUS BABE
I like this :D
this is what you get for having a language which such nonsensical pronunciation
as opposed to sounding like you're shouting, always
orsk orsk orsk IKKE orsk orsk INGLIKE orsk IKKE fVORDON TOL og er orsk IKKE
i sound like i'm shouting no matter what language i'm speaking tbf
"chickie in de baskie"
Second only to Samurai Deli Worker as my favourite TV chef.
no
because I don't add retards I went to school with and haven't seen in ten years.
but maybe your friends do and then you still get their shit clogging up your newsfeed
If this is turning in to a thread where we are unreasonable about other people's language errors,
then I want to declare that it annoys me when people use 'err' wrong - i.e. because they think it just means to choose one option. Like, they'll say "which way shall we err?" and then I'll say "why do we have to ERR at all!!" and I END UP LOOKING LIKE A DICK (justified).
The end.
Always err on the side of caution
exactly
It's a weird expression, actually
I presume it means that, if you discover (with hindsight) that the action chosen was a mistake, better that it was the action which had the least damaging consequences.
The way the expression is phrased, though, suggests that at the time of making the decision you should deliberately be making an error. Bizarre.
If that makes sense...
'Then' instead of 'than', 'brought' instead of 'bought'.
Horrific.
On a related note, people who insist on typing in their accent, to the point of ridiculous exaggeration. I'm always seeing the likes of 'the night' instead of 'tonight' from the proles* in my area.
*Not intended seriously
'the marra'
The worst is when..
people who type in the accent associated with where they live, but don't /actually/ talk in that accent because they're posh.
Just seems really mocking, you know?
what i want to know is
how on earth have you ended up with these people as your facebook friends in the first place?
when people type 'looser'
instead of loser.
I did this recently enough.
I have never been so ashamed of myself.
'James is ON ROUTE to the airport lol.'
No, James. You're EN ROUTE to the airport. And it's not fucking funny.
:D
yeah someone said this the other day
it seems to have become acceptable to use "lol" instead of a full stop (lol)
Top marketing skills:
http://tinyurl.com/2wcwy5q
HU DO U FINK U ARE COMMING IN DIS THRED N MAKIN FUN OV R HEROS
DEY R DIEING 4 R FREEDUM
I know someone who is in all other parts of English
perfectly correct with grammar etc. but seems to have a blindess with one particular word. Instead of writing 'being' he always writes 'been', as in "I know I'm been an idiot", bizarre and highly annoying!
DiS really is consensual intellectual S&M
That is all.
There's no wrong words there, just abbreviation en masse
Couldn't care less about grammar or spelling errors. It's when you see people using a completely different word that it's amazing because they obviously use it when they're speaking as well, just no one notices. where bounce u livin hun.
i saw a good ad on gumtree this morning that was full of stuff like this, such as "5 mints walk from..."
:'DDDD
I presume they meant you can devour exactly 5 polos in the time it takes to walk the distance
a pretty standard measure I think you'll find.
GRIPPING UPDATE BUMP:
So there i was, minding my own business, reading another DiS thread, getting linked to a Will Hutton article, not knowing exactly what solicism means when he used it, looking it up on Wikipedia, getting distracted by a chain of related articles on language, ending up on an article about 'eggcorns', being reminded of this thread.
Turns out the OP example isn't an 'eggcorn' at all (although I think there are some in the thread). Which is a shame, cos eggcorns are quite cute/logical - e.g. the original inspiration for the term (using "egg corn for the word acorn) or "old-timers' disease" for "Alzheimer's disease".
Apparently, the formal term to describe "where bounce u livin hun." thing in the OP is malapropism. And the dialogue for Officer Crabtree in 'Allo 'Allo was wall to wall with 'em.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eggcorn
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malapropism
LEAVING CONFERENCE
this is not exactly relevant, but i have this girl who spells EVERYTHING phonetically
recent examples: "gorjus", "preshur", "furnicher", "cuple", "pensil" and, most wonderfully, "flat wormin"
I saw Best Coast wrote "all the sudden" instead of "all of a sudden" on Twitter today.
Stupid cunt.
Speaking of stupid "n't"s
I can't help wincing when USians say 'I could care less' instead of 'I couldn't care less'. It's just fucking stupid and I can't see how removing the vital "n't", i.e. not, bit. It's worse than a double negative. It's a frikkin' non-negative negative.
Another one is the 'Do you got ___?' instead of 'Do you have ___?' or 'Have you got ___?' thing. And the awful matching answer of 'We don't got it' instead of 'We haven't got it' or 'We don't have it'. I, er, don't get it.
We're actually saying that we could care less, but we're not going to bother to, because that's how much we don't care.
So I guess the joke's on you.
Irregardless, it's an illogicialism.
Behave.
As I just said to theShipment, I'm not the type to get their knickers in a twist/panties in a bunch about UK-US differences like pissed off/pissed or the -ised/-iZed thing (the OED prefers Z for a start, so that one's not even a simple US-UK thing at all)...
...but you're seriously suggesting that "I could care less" is a shortening of "I could care less, but I'm not going to bother" (resulting in a phrase in complete contradiction to what it's supposed to mean) rather than just a straight up omission of the "n't" for no good reason?
I can kinda see the scope for it working when used sarcastically (like Tell me about it, when you don't want to be told about it), but any sarcastic element /really/ doesn't work well when written down.
Yeah that's right, I'm seriously suggesting it.
You can tell I'm totally serious.
Dead serious.
'kay.
I thought you were being serious.
Sarcasm doesn't come over too well over the intertrons.
OKAAAAAI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om7O0MFkmpw
Isn't it ok tho,
if you know you're doing it wrong?
And for the record, I prefer "I ain't got it."
Well I ain't convinced that all "don't got"-ters are doing it wrongly with intention.
And "ain't got it" isn't what I'm on about. Ain't stems from a verbal shortening. There's a logic to the spoken (and therefore the resultant written) corruption that's going on.
It's "I don't got" that rankles. It's just a straight up use of the wrong word for no (apparent) logical reason. And it seems to kinda mess up tenses too.
I'm not hung up about corruptions where they introduce some sort of logical 'improvement' (i.e. much rationalized* USian spelling) and I'm sure there's a long backstory of usage that makes it "valid", but it just sounds wrong to my ears.
I think Im just desensitized towards
what is right or wrong anymore. Too many viewings of The Wire/Treme/Menace 2 Society etc. and too much hip-hop has forever corrupted my knowledge of proper speech. Then you throw in the "schooling" I "got" in California, and the ragtag group of asians/blacks/mexicans/white trash group of friends I grew up with, and you have whatever mutt language I decide on for the hour.
Awww man.
Now I just feel bad for ever mentioning it.
Can this be the part of the show where we both break down in tears, have massive bearhug, and start telling each other what a 'journey' the whole thing's been?
Don't feel bad, I'm comfortable with my quarks.
Bro-hugs all around.
Having initially been non-plussed by the "I could give a shit" business I've decided that they are saying it ironically.
If you think of it being said more in terms of "as if I care about that" then it does actually make sense.
Logged in this morning to be greeted with this beauty:
K**** N*****: haha just seen d***** w******'s status's at least take me off block so i can see them durr spaz...U WILL NEVER EVER SEE MY DAUGHTER AGAIN URE A NUT JOB N U LICK STRONGBOW OFF SMACK EDS BEER MATS ...oh n dont threaten 2 get me done in..i know a lot of ppl...even ure bro n son ave sed keep u away from my girl u lowlife lying piece of shit...injuction already pending u got no chance...ROT IN PIECES BITCH :-) !!!
I can never understand people who do this.
Oh God, oh dear God
If there's ever a better phrase uttered anywhere at any time in the future, in BRILLIANT BLOCK CAPITALS than "U LICK STRONGBOW OFF SMACK EDS BEER MATS", then I will have had a very, very good life.
Almost crying.
What is really bothering me about facebook at the moment is all the Inbetweeners status'
the same people all day on a monday update with "INBETWEENERS TONITE LOL". Then afterwards the same people start with the quotes and the funny bits and urgh it just irritates me. I'm sure I've put a quote or two on my facebook but the same people are creaming their pants over the inbetweeners.
^ This
Fuckwits.
"Chillin wid lil man2day on sofa avin lots of huggles n watchin films,love u joshy lots n lots!!cein ma gorges bby lata n cookin dinna:-)x x"
And that's someone I'm related to!
Your goal of what now?
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4268322#r5597626
Have you noticed sometimes on Facebook
This thread pops up in your feed?
people who
don't know the different between 'of' and 'have'
or 'of' and 'off'
fucking idiots
i think the of/have thing
is more to do with people typing the way they talk, in some places its pretty common to replace have with of at least for speaking purposes haha i wouldnt do it typing though but i certainly say it a lot
yeah I find those mind blowing
came across some real crackers.
I love this that I saw posted on another forum
http://desmond.yfrog.com/Himg266/scaled.php?tn=0&server=266&filename=rosemarybeads.jpg&xsize=640&ysize=640
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
IGNORANT DOES NOT MEAN YOU'RE IGNORING SOMETHING YOU IGNORANT TREYBOYS
Fuck whether they're using "ignorant" properly.
"Rosemary beads" are solid gold.
no word of a lie, someone said
"in liten me"
:D
^ this one's amazing
aint my thought
Do you think when he's watching tennis he thinks they keep shouting out THOUGHT after an illegal serve?
No, because they shout 'OUT' not 'FAULT'.
They shout "fault" if it's a foot fault though.
cheers.
I fort they shouted "THOUGHT!"
"aint my thought"
fuck. king. hell.
On a YouTube comment once
"He wuld eat u up for brickfast"
That's not bad spelling , that was probably just a New Zealander
Mocking the recently bereaved: a new low for stanstubbs?
But REALLY now:
http://www.metro.co.uk/news/844639-british-backpacker-dies-in-four-floor-fall
His friend, James Jeavons, wrote on Facebook: ‘R I P bro * will be mist by all and * will never be out of ower mines 2 day has been the worest day 4 a long time.’
I've just spotted this one:
"The worst 2 words ever evented"
I saw a second instance of this today
from a more intelligent person. "If cloning is evented"
EVENTED. FUCK SAKE.
"where BANTS u livin hun."
"Rite off t z bank we go see if its good/bad/medioka news"
This reminds me of my step-brother
Who was only recently informed (by me) that the phrase is 'I can't be arsed' and not, as he'd thought, 'I can't be asked.'
Apparently he used to say it to his teachers and everything. Douche.
Can't be asked is almost an Eggcorn.
(see upthread)
I'm not sure whether I'm excusing them or not.
And vaguely logical in a way.
And therefore an Eggcorn candidate.
hmm, quite.
XXX XXX could quiet possibly be one of the happiest ladies on the planet at the moment =) xx
jury's out
could be a typo
"Lmao seee I'm physic :p xXx"
...
typo
variant spelling
XXXX XXXX oooooooooh politics ....... should be left to people with 2 arseholes , no morrels , arf a brain and a tendencie for oranges in the gob ! music has the power ! xx
EGSACLY !
EGG-SACK-LEE
(exactly)
"that was obismol!"
:<
Beccy H**** Wat u expect bein up since 6am wiv my child lol im guna lay dwn afta dina on the bk seats lol x
The guys in the stockroom at work spelling 'excess' as 'access', or even just giving up and putting 'xs'
ultimate winner on a daily mail online comment today
re Emma Watson:
She seems nice in interviews but that's because it's on tv or she's talking with people for a magazine interview, that's doesn't mean she's always nice. There just real people don't put them on pedal tools.
- Karen, London, 29/10/2010 7:16
pedal tools.
pedal. tools.
pedalol
pedal foo'
From the world of Twitter tonight
@emm_jack94
Emily Jackson
Im LOVING #hollyoakslater and its only been the first episode!! :D cant wait to see whats install for the rest of the week, eeeeeek!
You're a typo
No it isn't.
It could easily be an auto-correct nightmare, however.
It's probably an Eggcorn.
Kinda like a verbal typo, I guess, cos there's a vague level of plausibility in the use of install instead of in store. Although, for a typo to be a typo, does the person making the error have to know the coreect version? Or is it just ignorance if they don't know what the correct version is supposed to be? Either way, I'm going for Eggcorn.
coreect: a correction that has to be eked out.
Or just autocorrect on an HTC/iPhone.
Just to be all Occam's on your ass. Their systems are nightmare.
(Though they would still have had to make an 'instore'/'in store' fail.)
Not sure I understand you.
Are you saying that HTC phones do grammar check autocorrect, which has messed it up (along with messing up/not correcting a bunch of other stuff in that sentence)?
Cos, as you say, 'instore' and 'in store' are both correct in terms of spelling. So it's a simple (plausible, but wrong) word substitution thing (aka an eggcorn).
You're stabbing at the screen
and the problem is that if you're going quickly you can miss what it's going to auto-correct your typing to. I guess iPhone must have a similarly odd way of doing it as people fuck up on them too all the time.
If you tried to type 'instore' and fluffed it badly enough I can imagine 'install' could well pop up.
If autocorrect was indeed on
it would have corrected Im to I'm, cant to can't, whats to what's and probably its to it's. I think the person is just thick.
Essentially the whole thread is about eggcorns.
But yeah you have to know the correct version for something to be a typo.
Hmm
Lee Young 'geting a sexy girl is like geting shit from a roaking horse xxx'
Nicola Jayne Rees Don't take grants statements and make them your own Pmsl xx
about an hour ago · Like
Lee Young we was talking about the weekend so fck u 2 lol x
about an hour ago · Like
Paul Prosser I don't have tha problem m8 my rockin horse shits evrywhere haha
about an hour ago · Like
Lee Young lol mad
about an hour ago · Like
Nicola Jayne Rees What you tried to get shit from a rocking horse on the weekend?!? You said you was pissed but come on Pmsl xx
about an hour ago · Like
Lee Young no i was looking 4 a sexy girl
about an hour ago · Like
Nicola Jayne Rees Or trying to get shit out of a rocking horse?!? Pmsl
about an hour ago · Like
Lee Young yes i was wanker the rocking horse off
about an hour ago · Like
Nicola Jayne Rees There's no shame in admitting you was trying to get a rocking horse to shit Lee x
about an hour ago · Like
Lee Young u can av fun on a rocking horse sum girls do not like 2 rock x
about an hour ago · Like
Nicola Jayne Rees Oooo look who's biting xx
about an hour ago · Like · 1 person
Kirstie Powell Ha ha funny as fp x
She has 1145 friends eh?
are you kitten me her body is perfect bro
That was in quotes ^^
I didnt say that
Cringe when I read the top of this thread 'really fucking thick people' I sound like a bellend
i went to a facebook i knew would have some on it, here is what i found;
Amm everithing that goes on that job centre jst go on that and send ur cv till everithing
everithing
Ya boyfriend still looking for a job then?
:P
we both are, its not off his facebook. I have one person who types like this on my friends list, and they dont really type like that, its her friends who do. I remember reading through her comments one day amazed at the wonderful words some of them were inventing.
really though, it drives me nuts.
I know these are ten-a-penny
And most of them aren't funny, and are just typos rather than what we're looking for, but there's a good on on here
http://www.happyplace.com/3645/the-best-obnoxious-responses-to-misspellings-on-facebook
The one where some former students are bitching about their old teacher and then she joins the group.
This is pretty good
For all intensive purpose
ARGH
It's beggars' belief
There was some loan advert on the tube recently talking about money to 'tie' you over.
And Natwest cashpoints request you put in your PIN number.
^^^ These two are examples of more heinous failure than any quick FB update.
Theo Theo Theo
I was once patronised by a man in HMV when I asked him to put in his "PIN number". He was buying Naruto, two wrestling DVD's and a bowling for soup and Dido album. I now assume that was you. Good work
I have no idea what most of those things are, ducky.
But rest assured I would never tell someone serving me that it should just be 'PIN' instead of 'PIN number'. Speech is speech, as are quick FB updates; text you put up on your cashpoint/advertising hoarding that should have gone past editors and various checks needs to be right.
That said, given the tone of your post I'm on the side of the man in HMV in this case.
;-)
If you say "PUT IN YOUR PIN" it sounds really angry
If you say "put in your pin number" it sounds playful, like a shoal of teddies bouncing around a meadow. You'd never have made it in the nightmare world of retail
It was too cushy, that's why.
I did my time sorting maggot-infested laundry and answering calls from irate customers, attempting to convince them I wasn't lying when I said we'd get another van out to fulfil their short order of chef's whites and tea towels.
:D
also pretty surprised Theo didn't point out the unneeded apostrophe in "DVD's" there
i came into this thread with low expectations
they were met
this made me laugh:
I thought i was going to die last night on my way home, crash in to a car(brakes failes), in a doggie as fuck area, where peopel are looking in the car, and 2 phones got taken next to the car. Need my own car now.
I've read this so many times
and still don't understand it.
DOGGIE AS FUCK :D
Love this
http://i1231.photobucket.com/albums/ee502/gringo7755/314311_254126611294605_137949319579002_791710_1184969045_n.jpg
Someone on facebook just wrote
"buffy food cuming long now :)"
I hope they have a cake shaped like Giles
:)
Not a typo/misuse of words, but...
...I've 'friended' a girl I work with, who's lovely and has not a bad bone in her body, but I can't bring myself to read any of her status updates because She's Got A Really Annoying Habit Of Capitalising Every Single Word In Her Updates, As If She's Constantly Typing With Her Little Finger On The Shift Key At All Times.
Vague acquaintance I have as a friend who was enjoying the Superbowl:
What a finish we're install for!!!!!!! Come on!
It's spreading then D:
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4266817#r6265161
a friend on Facebook, not stupid (most times), but can't really spell
wrote "Dolphin-Wah potatoes" when describing what he ate for dinner that day.
:D
Mazing.
perhaps they were served with tuna
Wot is it a grab
on a picture of a hermit crab thas has homed itself inside a glass shell. unsure if it's a typo, a joke, or complete stupidity.
A GRAB I BE
jfc
sounds like an eggcorn, seeing as crabs grab, it sounds the same, and g isn't quite close enough to c on the keyboard.
amazing.
eggcorn?
ctrl+f
ah i had missed that
quite interesting actually.
they tread a fine line between endearing and ridiculous
It is like a new language
Person A - What guy?
Person N - U bein serious?!
Person A - Yeah mate I don't know, what's happening?
Person L - Copper outside mine sed itz awe safe nw n mattrz bn dealt wi..ach well smhing to talk about eh lol..
Person N - Some nut went mentooo in scumbenauld. He's mento hav taken some1 hostage in the polis station. Read fb since bout 9 the nite. Most folk hav had something 2 say on it
Person N - Exactly L u manage 2 get outside then :-) lol x
Person A - Just read your last post with the picture. I'm going to steal it and see if anybody else knows anything.
Person L - Aye lol..fkn tesco wizny evn shut lol..he wiz meant t hav went tesco n bfeater n blokbuster then polis n handed himsel in ..but prob a fkn water pistol n a wein lol x
Person N - Batter in mate. Its aw dun noo anyway, Scumby's bak 2 bein as pish as b4!!!! :-)
Person N - Aye prob L or Mibi if somebody had told him the town centre had SHUT at 5 on a sunday he wouldnt hav went mentooooo an went on a **ahem** "gun rampage" lol x
Person L - Ach itl b fk awe fk it lol..aye pizza hut ran oot or smhing dafft twat he wiz ..am jst shokd the polis did anyhing tbh..x
Person N - Well they couldnae really avoid it this time if the guy really did hold up the station!!!! Lol x
Person L - Stil widny shok me hahhah..thy prob awe pulled straws to c who was gonny get up n go tae the desk lol x
Person N - Aye exactly............. "who's this prick, its a sunday night for fuks sake!!!! Naw, u go!!! Fuk me........... A SHOTGUN?!!!!!!!!" hahahaha earnd ure money thr nite didnt ya lol x
Person L - Hahaha aye..ma neighbour foned thm wkz ago coz her hubby gt jumped n attakd..thy r still w8n ffs!!...x
Person N - Dear god in govan!! An they wonder why they get no respect!! Lazy, fat arseholes!!! x
Person L - A know eh..wiz tkn wee dug a walk 8pm n wi hiz wee boy n gt jumped..nice eh..n polis stil no bn 4 a statement tht wiz wkz ago nw..fkn terribl..h8 thm!!!!xactly n thy want respected..nvr..x
Person N - Dont kno who's worse. The fukkrs jumpn an innocent dad, in front of his son or the supposed police, who r paid 2 serve an protect the community!!!!!! BULLSHIT!! Country's fukkd man! Hope the dude's awryte an gets his revenge x
Person L - Aye hez gd n thy wer weinz..a knw itz mad innit itz both shokin tbh..no real eh x
blokbuster
It's bad enough when people do it in English...
I fucking hope and pray these posts came from phones
the thought of someone actually typing this gibberish on a keyboard gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Person
A
N
A
L
Mind blown
you're the alan moore of DiS
:)
MENTO
Person 1: [Comment about a certain topic, inviting input on said topic]
1st reply: [relevant response]
2nd reply: [different relevant response]
Person 1 again: [Thanks for responses...but how about...if I try this...]
Some fucking dustbin of a person: Hi hun!! - not seen u for years..what's going on with Dave? u still in Nottingham, drinks soon yeh?xo"
some fucking dustbin of a person
:-D
dunno if this counts
but i've seen this a lot:
I LOVE YPOU
I LV YUPO
I LUV YOPU
I LOVE PYOU
in fact i was in the light in leeds the other night, and as i walked past this store window they had a lot of valentine's hearts stuck to the glass on which various members of the public had WRITTEN, not typed, but WRITTEN WITH A FELT TIP PEN the word "YPOU".
i would like to think they are being ironic, like when people say "pwn". i don't think they are, though.
a recent one:
Y ARE MEN??
deep
``Good knowledge! Very eyebrow...``
y'know what
this has made me laugh muchly. a very good bump.
I had to delete someone for this mess the other day:
http://tinypic.com/r/2cd78yx/6
She was the worst culprit for doing exactly what she 'appears' to be saying here.
Constant 'my son watchin telly loll!!!1' or 'ioning well borin innit xoxo'.
She's 33 by the way.
ioning
WHERE BOUNCE U LIVIN HUN
`how did an 11yr old boy manage to travelle from manchester airport to rome on his own without a passport or a boarding pass. no wonder the countrys full of iiligelle imigrents.`
hahahahaha
amazing
You know what really aggravazes me? It's them immigants. They wants all the benefits of living in Springfield, but they ain't even bother to learn themselves the language.
*sigh*
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4266817#r5566272
The tin transfers some taist where as glass doesnt same reason a pint taists better from a glass then a plastic xx
Bit mean mate, c_r'll probably see this
That is funny, but he actually probably will see that posted on FB!
You have an interesting relationship with racism, don't you?
It's on your mind a lot.
got one
sat out bloody hospital in serious pain and its a 4 hour waiting list losing my patents with some people in here honestly love not everyone wants to no your private life so shut up
just read the whole thread
& not one mention of seen instead of seems
for shame
One of my friends called someone else a Pre Madonna
bump
What happened to the proud Home of the British Army that Aldershot used to be?! Yes it has always had its floors but at least we still had a bit of pride!!
:D
:D
Oops.
That comment is wrong on so many levels
I don't have such friends
thank fuck
Bookmarks > Add to Reading List
Aquatences- that word always reminds me of Paul Lefevre lol. "Your not friends, your aquatences" xxx
just seen "well gel"
it's brilliant
hapy new year 2 u to m8
I love this thread
Thought it was just me.39 and all...l
Fault I'd show the wife how I doit ! ;)
i think of this thread every time i say the word mental
Just read this on a customer review:
"Enjoyed my first visit, disses pointed with showers and lockers"
You're going to have to give us some pacific examples.
Mind due was willing Chelsea to go the same way!!
Someone talking about Mrs Brown's Boys
"I ad 1st 2 series on dvd bout 2 yr ago, no1 ad even erd bout it then. Best fing is wen they dnt keep t script n freestyle. Shit hot!"
And I wonder why I should avoid that show...
This isn't really the same as everything else on here but I have literally no idea why I just read it all. From a crushingly dull, militant atheist type
A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx.
"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being that the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ"
At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.
"How old is this rock?"
The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian"
"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it, If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real.... then it should be an animal now."
The Professor was visibly shaken and dropped his copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.
The students applauded and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk board. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.
smirked quite Jewishly
:'DDD
What does this even MEAN
If you watched Baywatch followed by Gladiators followed by Blind Date on a Saturday evening, started school with singing in the main hall, played in the woods, always rode your bike, a game was Kiss Chase or Bulldog with not a computer in sight (!), had to be in before dark, got grounded if you were late, not even the home phone was mobile... vandalism was scratching the school desk with a compass, you recorded the top 40 off the radio on tape, got 10 sweets in a 10p mix and you turned out ok, then re-post, THIS IS WHEN BRITAIN WAS GREAT BRITAIN!!!
Hate this thread getting bumped
Leave it be
you need to up the antie
* auntie
Scotland greedy politions, how much scotish peoples injoing free prescription, no tetution fee, free education, it shoun'd be.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-21828424?postId=115696317#comment_115696317
wo
Y?
Y U DO DIS?
Y U BUMP THREAD??!?!!?
THREAD DEAD!!!
Except my friend request :L