The Scottish -
"Q - How was the Padirac Cave dug?
A- At first there was just a rabbit hole, then a scottish tourist dropped a penny down it"
The English -
A housewife bothers her husband who is sitting quietly in his armchair reading the newspaper:
"Harry, get up. Let me sweep there so it will be clean for when the maid comes"
The Irish -
"My poor friend," the doctor said, "I regret to inform you that you will be paralysed completely down your left side. There can have only been one cause of this: alcohol"
"But doctor, it can't be!" responded the irishman, "I always hold my glass in my right hand!"
There. Take that britain. Its not nice now the shoes on the other foot, is it? You can go on about frogs legs and surrender all you like, but I would bow down yourselves in the face of such biting satire.