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Went to the dentist

ehwhat [Edit] [Delete] 50 replies 12:35 May 14th, 2010

He said "Say 'Ah'"
I said "Why?"
He said "My dog's died"

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ehwhat | 14 May '10, 12:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
you monster

foppyish | 14 May '10, 12:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
Went to the Chinese Dentist at half past two.

He wasn't amused by my semi-racist chuckling. Turns out he's Korean! Stupid dentist.

thewarn | 14 May '10, 12:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
- if i ever notice it's 2.30, wherever i am, whoever i'm with
  
  i always ask "what time is it?"
  
  "2.30"
  
  "oh, you should go the dentist"
  
  maybe my favourite joke
  
  CrispinAlexander @thewarn | 23 Jun '10, 11:34 | X | ^ This | Reply
Does your dog bite

no
ouch, you said your dog doesn't bite
that's not my dog

Balonz | 14 May '10, 12:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
- This happened at the dentist
  
  Balonz @Balonz | 14 May '10, 13:15 | X | ^ This | Reply
  
  DaveMK and ethricdouble this'd this
  - yeah, I hear ya.
    
    I've got a dentist
    
    (not a dog though)
    
    thewarn @Balonz | 14 May '10, 13:16 | X | ^ This | Reply
My dog's got no nose

How does he smell?
Stop making fun of my stammer. My dog's got no-no-nose ache.
Oh. How does he smell?
fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck off

thewarn | 14 May '10, 12:40 | X | ^ This | Reply

JohnM this'd this
- wonderful
  
  mac_daddy @thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:23 | X | ^ This | Reply
  
  Lucien this'd this
- Still brilliant
  
  JohnM @thewarn | 23 Jun '10, 11:12 | X | ^ This | Reply
  
  JohnM this'd this
  - agreed
    
    mac_daddy @JohnM | 12 Oct '11, 15:28 | X | ^ This | Reply
Took my dog to the vet, he picked her up to inspect her.

The vet said "I'm going to have to put her down"
I said "Why? What's wrong with her?"
He said "She's really heavy."

I don't even have a dog.

deadonthestairs | 14 May '10, 12:44 | X | ^ This | Reply

meowington, Lucien, and urbanfox this'd this
Went to the dentist yesterday, asked the secretary for the bill

Here we are. £45 - check-up, £15 - plaque
What is the charge for ‘Plaque’? The dentist said I had an admirable mouth.
It is to be hung in the lobby to commemorate our boys who have been massacred in the theatre of war

Lucien | 14 May '10, 12:59 | X | ^ This | Reply
Good thread.

Would read again.

TheWza | 14 May '10, 13:00 | X | ^ This | Reply
Went to the dentist with my dog.

What do you think you're doing? Enquired the man
'Sausages' replied dog
SICK BURN I screamed
*Exit*

I don't have a dog.

thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:00 | X | ^ This | Reply
- took my dog to the dentist.
  
  "sorry no dogs", said the dentist.
  "walls", said the dog
  
  i dont have a dog.
  
  meths @thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:02 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - still fascinated by this post
    
    _TheBeautifulOnes_ @meths | 27 Feb '13, 15:24 | X | ^ This | Reply
- hang on wait,
  
  your dog can talk?
  
  meths @thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:03 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - might start a thread on that
    
    thewarn @meths | 14 May '10, 13:15 | X | ^ This | Reply
I went to my Dog

"My Dentist has no nose" I told him.
"how does he smell?" enquired my dog.
"Bugger me! You can talk" I screamed.

I have a cat.

terminus_est | 14 May '10, 13:03 | X | ^ This | Reply
- can your cat talk?
  
  meths @terminus_est | 14 May '10, 13:04 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - there is a core of semantic content to his miaow
    
    terminus_est @meths | 14 May '10, 14:34 | X | ^ This | Reply
i took my dog to the dentist yesterday

i said "can you look at my dog's teeth? because every time he barks he sounds like jimi hendrix"
the dentist said "it's probably his chihuahua pedal"

colon_closed_bracket | 14 May '10, 13:05 | X | ^ This | Reply

this'd this
I visited my doctor two weeks ago

He laid me down on the bed and said sombrely:
You need to stop smoking.
So I put down my pipe and let him continue with the exam.

The exam revealed only two minor medical issues.

Lucien | 14 May '10, 13:11 | X | ^ This | Reply
- was one of them with regard to your pipes?
  
  thewarn @Lucien | 14 May '10, 13:16 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - Didn't you read his post?
    
    They did everything they could but I'm afraid his pipe had to be put down.
    
    sadpunk @thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:18 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - I don't know whether to feel sorry for him,
      
      or express outrage that he proclaims such a sad event 'a minor medical issue'
      
      thewarn @sadpunk | 14 May '10, 13:20 | X | ^ This | Reply
I had a job as a template

I was NOT cut out for it.

PreludesNocturnes | 14 May '10, 13:19 | X | ^ This | Reply
My dentist leaned over and whispered
"I see a lot of decay"
"Around my gums?"
"No, in society"
"How did you get a medical licence? You’re a dog"
"Shut up or I'll smash your pipe"

Lucien | 14 May '10, 13:21 | X | ^ This | Reply
- ...and I'm gone
  
  thewarn @Lucien | 14 May '10, 13:23 | X | ^ This | Reply
  
  sadpunk, mac_daddy, deadonthestairs, Scout, and Antpocalypsenow this'd this
I noticed my local dentist (Peter Kay-Nine) emerging from my

imaginary dog's kennel.
'What is this!' I exclaimed in surprise.
'Not really a dentist anyway! And my names shit!' He rasped whilst running out my garden.

thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:19 | X | ^ This | Reply
- You think you've got it bad?
  
  Think of Peter's wife!
  
  thewarn @TheBeautifulOnes | 14 May '10, 13:23 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - (she hasn't even got a dog)
    
    thewarn @thewarn | 14 May '10, 13:24 | X | ^ This | Reply
- i went to the dentist
  
  "not seen you in ages man"
  "yeah i've not been"
  "yeah, makes sense."
  "anyway, how's tricks?"
  "so so, too many polish people... don't know what to say to them"
  "yeah, do they speak english?"
  "nope, not all of them"
  "that must be difficult"
  "hmm, it can be"
  "what do they ask for?"
  "nothing - they just come in and that, point at their teeth... dentistry's quite universal, you know?"
  "yeah suppose"
  "what about you?"
  "yeah things are good."
  "and any problems?"
  "nope, not really."
  "cool well I'll give them a clean and a polish and get you on your way"
  "thanks"
  
  justanothersheeldz | 14 May '10, 13:26 | X | ^ This | Reply
- PIPESMASH
  
  mac_daddy | 14 May '10, 13:27 | X | ^ This | Reply
- question: Should I take my dog to see the dentist?
  
  Answer: http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/53400
  
  meths | 14 May '10, 13:27 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - p.s. i havent read the answer.
    
    meths @meths | 14 May '10, 13:29 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - copy/paste
      
      "Yes, a veterinarian isn't always highly skilled in pet dentistry much like your family doctor isn't specialized in dentistry."
      
      meths @TheBeautifulOnes | 14 May '10, 13:31 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - In Prison Break a vet sewed T-Bag's severed hand back on
        
        it didn't take so I see where you are coming from.
        
        Balonz @meths | 14 May '10, 13:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        the guys in prison break look like their massive necks/heads
        
        have been attached to their bodies by a dentist.
        
        none of them have a dog as far as i'm aware.
        
        meths @Balonz | 14 May '10, 13:39 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - WENTIST.
      
      TheSoundofBastards | 14 May '10, 13:41 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - WENT TO SEE THE WEE NURSE TODAY,
      
      SHE SAID "YOU GOTTA STOP MASTURBATING."
      
      I SAID "WHY DOLL?"
      
      SHE SAID "COZ AM TRYING TO EXAMINE YOU."
      
      ALAN_MCGEE_WEE_MAN | 14 May '10, 13:49 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - I got fired from my job in the juice factory
        
        :(
        
        They said I couldn't concentrate.
        
        terminus_est | 14 May '10, 14:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - Doesn't make sense in print, only when spoken.
        
        My dog has no nose
        How does he smell?
        He doesn't, that's one of his no-nos
        
        ehwhat | 14 May '10, 15:11 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - Mr Ben's really aged since he became an Uncle.
        
        PreludesNocturnes | 14 May '10, 18:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - went to the dentist
        
        said 'ah aogs aot o ose'
        totally ignored me
        
        ethricdouble | 27 Feb '13, 15:34 | X | ^ This | Reply

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