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The Hurt Locker

orsonwellesrabbit [Edit] [Delete] 02:15, 20 December '09

Ten minutes in and I'm wondering if film critics have gone insane. This is one of the best films of the year? Seriously?

Plot summary: Soldiers defuse bombs in Iraq. To do this, they must first engage in some manly half-assed banter which we don't care about. Camera shakes a lot. Lame attempts at character development are made. Inexplicably, Sarge describes what he's about to do by way of defusing the bomb to his men, who sort of already know what he's about to do since they do the same job. Imagine a fireman saying to a colleague outside a burning house: "Alright, mate, I'm going to plug this hose into this hydrant and then squirt water at the fire until it is extinguished." Sarge gets killed. Camera shakes a lot. Soldiers get new Sarge who is a loon. Soldiers and new Sarge engage in some half-assed banter. Surly black guy, we realize, should be the real Sarge. Camera shakes a lot. Someone in a turban looks suspicious. Because they are wearing a turban, I guess. New Sarge and soldiers can rest easy - it ain't nothin'. Sarge and soldiers defuse bombs one after the other, each bomb more bomb-ier than the last. Camera shakes a lot. The End.


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