I did a trial shift in a bar where I was called Heather all night, I'm not Heather. The manager gave me some homemade cocount cake that some old lady in a car outside had given him. It was nice.
A guy came in and gave me a kiss and some Polish delicacy. It wasn't nice, it was fibre glass, crushed wafers, polyfiller and shit. I think. It was called Chewla or something and I advise you stay away.
I got some falafel on the way home whereupon the guy serving gave me loads of extras but did tell all the other staff that I was Daisy and I like falafel. I'm not Daisy. But I do like falafel.
Then I come home to face three major falafel related problems....
- There's no yoghurt. I resolved this with some of my own.
- All the extras and all the salad is jam packed with onions. I'm talking a full onion in this thing, raw. But I didn't realise for a long time because there so many others things going on in there too. I am allergic to onions. I will now be ill for circa 48 hours.
- One stealthy little falafel hid itself away and so when I discovered it the falafel to pitta/salad/condiment ratio was totally fucked.
Are you all still awake after that?!