i) there's a massive one outside my window. I watched it building it's web earlier, it must be at least a foot across, and it's currently wrapping up a fully grown wasp. pretty amazing.
ii) does your gran use the word spiders as a subsitute for the expletive 'shit!'? Mine does.
iii) look at this - I'm not quite sure what's going on here, but I never ever ever want to go to war in Iraq. http://www.camelspiders.net/large-camel-spider.jpg