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Man tries to cure constipation using hammers
"He said he had a few drinks to dull the pain and then came up with the idea of poking a hammerhead up his backside in the hope of sorting out the constipation.
But the hammerhead got stuck and then he came up with the idea of using a second hammerhead in order to try and get out the first - but then he lost the second one as well."
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2549237/Drunk-man-got-two-hammered.html