The genius PraxisTent thread got me to thinking about this message I received a few days back on myspace which I literally can't make head nor tail of.

I've put on gigs in the past where not everything has run completely smoothly, or I have made mistakes as part of a learning curve, or due to not really knowing exactly what standard procedure was, and certainly played a few gigs where this has been the case to varying levels, but this literally doesn't even make sense, and it is impossible to see how it could. Here is the message exactly how it was received :

Subject:

gig offerS

Body:

"Hey guys you want to do a gig at the following dates...

We are idealy only looking for local supports for the following dates or for bands who have a great following at the venues. Reason being is we need to get a good crowd for the two touring bands. Bands will need to be willing to help with pre sales with tickets and confident they can get a fan base to the venues. We will heavily promote gigs also and if these events go well this will guarentee future events with us.

It will be good fun and the aim as always is to get plenty of exposure.

So the REMAINING dates in august are

3 Kingston - fighting cocks

your from brighton whats ur fanbase like there?

let me know if your interested

BTW I see your booking agent is alex dutton i dont particularly want to deal with him he owes me money as it is so if you want to do a show with us then feel free to reply ;)

thanks

vincent"

Bear in mind the following :

- We are from Brighton, not Kingston, he even recognises this.

- My band, while not being widely known in terms of being a household name, is far beyond the level of "local band", even if we were from Kingston.

- I don't have a clue who Alex Dutton is, he is certainly not our booking agent. And that final sentence makes less sense than anything else he has written before it.

Can anyone even attempt to explain this? Why is this guy even bothering?

Does anyone have any experiences with unbelievably inept promoters they would like to share? Must be a few good stories out there!