As Rhyl get buffooned 4-0 by Partizan Belgrade in the early European rounds, not much else is happening.

Why not?

Perhaps we should speculate wildly for a change.

And as BBC isn't working for me, where better to start than Falseball365?

Mark Hughes has made a public plea for 'stale' John Terry to join Man City.

Craig Bellamy is being linked with a move to Sunderland.

Will the lad Chamakh makh the switch to Arsenal to replace Adebayor?

Joe Kinnear is likely to return as Newcastle boss, relegation odds likely to tumble.

Bernard Mendy wants to leave Hull. I hope Sam Ricketts joins Pompey. I know his cousin.

Blackburn Rovers will give Christian Vieri time over a move to the North West. He's got to be past it now. Surely.

C'mon.