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http://sadtrombone.com

www.fmylife.com

:D

Well played sir, well played.

:D

i was on the phone when i opened that and i had to excuse myself whilst i rofled.

Took me a sec, but very good :D

i'm gonna make this a sticky thread and everything

http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=%22small+white%2C+petite+thing%2C+cooks+for+me%22&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-GB:official&client=firefox-a

Come on!

http://sadtrombone.com

Genius.

But, I am extremely immature.

Well done, that man !

Well, naturally.

and they sat reading it for about a half hour before turning round and asking me why I'd tell them my girlfriend was shagging my dad. Not one of them got it, dumb fucks.

This: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=26F5wwl8k9E

The joke only worked until half way down. Why would your dad ask you how your sandwich press (whatever it is...gf?)

Total fail.

haven't seen that button before.

I get it now George Foreman grill. I'm a vegetarian...maybe that makes no difference. I don't cook.

Still not funny...

no offence. obviously a lot of effort was put in, so well done!

fine ok THAT JOKE WAS SHIT
there are you happy?

months ago, absolutely hammered, blubbering and asking why no one loved me. at least that was funny.

of fence?

no biggie

do you want to join my band, Sonoluminescence? its the new DiS super group

have you amnesia?

it will absorb davy and his tin whistle army tho, you cool with that?

garagey, noisey, heavy, dubby, electro-ish, KRUNK, with emphasis on the bass and drums

what direction will you take our fledging super grouping?

or they could like be our roadies

and the sound of the Replacements covering the Cure. and some lazy rhythm guitar.

err... so far, me, you, cowcow, and someone who doesnt even post anymore

EVEN OAKS START OFF AS ACORNS, OR SOME SHIT

im working on song titles;

stripey cardigan love

broken hornrim blues

/neither

that I took a look at the pic.

ETI

copied and pasted from other message boards :P

and GF means George Forman grill! oh you.

I must be thick, but finally got it....

Tweeted!

Absolute gold

Okay, this is how it goes. You get an orangutan. I’m not talking a little monkey or some dancing chimp bullshit, I mean a fucking orangutan. Don’t ask me how you’re gonna get a fucking orangutan, because that’s not my problem.
So the orangutan’s name is Clyde. This is non-negotiable; all orangutans are named Clyde. I don’t know why that is, it’s just how the world works. So you and Clyde become man (and ape) about town. You’re seen everywhere together, you make the scene. You and friends go out in big groups. You talk loud, you laugh louder. Every time you say something witty, you high-five the orangutan. The town begins to buzz. It gets back to here. “Did you know the guy with the orangutan?”, “You use to date the guy with the orangutan?”, “Why would you break up with a guy with an orangutan?”. Next thing you know she’s calling.

“I’m hoping we can still be friends. Wanna hang out sometime?”
“Geez, I dunno; me and Clyde were going to a monster truck race tonight (orangutans love monster trucks). In fact, the whole social calendar seems kinda full. I tell you what, I’ll make a little note (what was your name again?) and maybe I can squeeze you in. Oh, well, you know my number so don’t be a str-- Hey, look at the time! I gotta skate, Clyde’s making Mojitoes.”

At this point the upper hand is yours. You can let her twist the wind, you can draw her back into your life at the pace you decide. Whatever, it’s your life. But if you’re a smart man? You slowly phase her back in. You’re IM-ing. You’re talking on Live. You get invited to family functions. You bring Clyde, he becomes like one of the family. You’re one big Brady Bunch.

over 85,000 people have looked at this thread since it was posted.

Nice work for something that basically came from one of those 'hilarious' circular e-mails middle managers send to each other.

Top Peter Kay one-liners

until I realized that GF meant "George Foreman" as in, 'George Foreman grill' I knew something was amiss before I clicked the link though because it didn't make sense for him to include a pic unless it was a picture of them in the act--which he wouldn't likely have had time to take.

http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/4190118#r5151409

But who?

what do i win?
http://i48.tinypic.com/2q00vte.jpg

quality bump

you sir just made my day. i was feeling really bad for you for a second until i opened that photo link. i had to open it twice before i understood. fantastic

It was bad enough the first time round.

George Foreman would never allow himself to be connected to anything this tacky... is what I said the first time I heard about the concept of a 'George Foreman' steak grilling machine.

P.S. A welcome return for DiS' worst ever thread!

I'm in bad mood and your story really made me laugh a lot ha ha ha. Thank you so much ^_^

sounds like a perfect opportunity to ask for somehting expensive.

i feel ashamed.

HAHAHA

can complain about that type of site traffic.

who has the most viewed profile?

Do a thread. Go on.

:D

:D

had over 100k hits this week?!

it may end up being what funds the redesign, for sure.
anyone want to start a few threads like this in order to fund DiS?

It's no SOAWJO that's for sure.

and most of all the writers of that episode of the Simpsons with the film festival and the football in the groin and Krusty saying the loud part quiet and the QUIET PART LOUD. You taught me all I know about comedy. *weeps*

Have I saved the forum?

http://tinyurl.com/3opr8qk (screencap)

(She just texted me to say thanks for the mum's day amazon vouchers.)

but it's still brilliant.

1. LeeNewell
2. jtown
3. this guy

You gaggle of cunts!