on the left: A convicted paedophile who still lives with his mother (must be in her 70s), along with his 40-something brother. They don't even own a car. Once my little brother kicked a football over into their garden, it came back over with a huge slash in it.

on the right: An old lady, she's alright, if you kick a football over in her garden it's always returned within a day in good condition.